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The Vyper's Den II



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876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Wed Feb 07, 2018 1:59 am
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ShadowVyper says...



Welcome to the Vyper's Den!

Come on in, make yourself comfortable. I'm glad you're here!

Clearly, since you're reading this, you've written something that you'd like feedback on. So I'll give you some general expectations for what you'll be getting if you request one from me!

My Style

My style tends to be making comments about anything that stands out to me as I'm reading. That means I'll point out specific phrases/bits of dialogue/descriptions that I really liked and thought you did a great job with -- as well as awkward bits that you can improve upon. I try to give specific, concrete examples of what I'm talking about, taken directly from your own work.

I will then give you a general overview of my thoughts about your piece as a whole. This is generally where you'll get critiques on pacing, flow, characters, plot, etc. The stuff that relates to your story as a whole.

I'm not great at self-promotion, but I generally look at reviewers' past work before I request a review from them, so feel free to do the same and check out my past reviews if you want to see the sort of review you'll be getting.

I try to give fairly comprehensive reviews, but if you have a specific concern you'd like me to comment on specifically (characterization/description/imagery/whatever) I can certainly try to zero in my attention on whatever you'd like the most help with! Just mention it in your request!

My Preferences

I write action/adventure and fantasy and I read sci-fi so those are what I'm most comfortable with and are what I will probably be able to give you the best feedback on. However, I'm open to other genres as well. It's just possible that I won't be able to provide quite as thorough as feedback on them.

I'm willing to review novel chapters, poems, or short stories. I've only reviewed a handful of lyrics/scripts, but I'm willing to give them a try if you want me to! For novel chapters, I'd appreciate if you could give me a brief synopsis of what happened in previous chapters when you link me to the chapter you'd like reviewed. I'm happy to jump into a novel late to review, but I likely won't have time to read the previous chapters, so a summary helps!


What I Won't Review

I retain the right to refuse any review for any reason -- but in general there's not much that I'm not willing to review. I'm a bit squeamish so overly graphic horror (especially supernatural!) I will likely not be able to get through, but feel free to request it, and I'll see if it's too grisly for me to stomach.

I won't review actively anti-religious pieces either, but with a caveat. I am a Christian and I don't enjoy reading pieces that are just talking about how stupid/wrong/etc. Christians are for their beliefs. However, if you take the time to write a thoughtful essay on the matter and you're looking for feedback on how a Christian would answer your arguments, I'm totally down for that. Here is an example of when I did just that.

Bring on the requests!
Last edited by ShadowVyper on Fri Jan 18, 2019 5:28 am, edited 2 times in total.
  





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876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Thu Jan 03, 2019 7:17 am
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ShadowVyper says...



Does anyone want to feed my Rampage? :D
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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75 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2709
Reviews: 75
Tue Jan 15, 2019 2:17 am
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AlyTheBookworm says...



Hi Shadow!

Could you review Luminous: Cicadas (Prologue) ?

It's a 2,500 word prologue for a fantasy novel I'm writing. I'm mostly looking for feedback on story, characters, and pacing, but any suggestions or constructive criticism would be appreciated if you'd like to check it out. :)
  





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876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Tue Jan 15, 2019 4:38 am
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ShadowVyper says...



Will do! I’m traveling now but I’ll try to get it done on Thursday! :) @AlyTheBookworm
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





User avatar
876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Fri Jan 18, 2019 5:29 am
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ShadowVyper says...



Done!
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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121 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 310
Reviews: 121
Sun Feb 10, 2019 4:57 pm
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manilla says...



Heya! Would you mind reading this? You don't need any knowledge of the fandom to understand what's going on.

La pluie de l'aprés-midi (Miraculous Ladybug - 1)
Pronouns: she/they

From the wild manila folder of YWS's office.

When the last tree has fallen
And the rivers are poisoned
You cannot eat money


I do reviews: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=188&t=108365
  





User avatar
876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Sat Feb 16, 2019 5:12 am
ShadowVyper says...



Done! Anyone else? :D
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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103 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 297
Reviews: 103
Mon Feb 25, 2019 2:10 am
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Samhain says...



Hey Shady! Care to review my latest post, Thorne (1) ? I don't know if this is a genre you are open to reading (you didn't specify otherwise). It's the first installment of a horror story.
2 Legit, 2 Legit 2 Quit
  





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61 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 4338
Reviews: 61
Mon Mar 04, 2019 3:46 am
OofOof1 says...



Hello


I'm just here to stop by to say hi.
listen here, you don't need to post your food on social media in order to eat it. :pirate3:
  





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876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Wed Mar 06, 2019 12:23 am
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ShadowVyper says...



Hey @OofOof1!

Thanks for dropping by to say hello! But just so you know, this is my thread in Will Review For Food, which means that this is the place where you can leave a link to one of your literary works to ask me specifically to review it for you. That way if you have a specific person you'd like to review a specific work, then you have a place to ask them to do that.

If you're just looking for some chit-chat, then going to someone's personal profile and writing on their wall is a great option for that (just click on a person's username by their avatar) or you could even send them a personal message using the banner at the top of thte screen. You can also check out The Lounge or Randomosity if you're looking for some casual chatting grounds with other users! :)
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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188 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 6366
Reviews: 188
Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:51 am
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LadyBug says...



Hi! I wrote an action/fantasy story. It is my life's work and I would love if you reviewed it to help make my writing better. It is called Abnormals (Part One).

Thank you!
-Jade
:pirate3:
  





User avatar
876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Fri Mar 08, 2019 12:44 am
ShadowVyper says...



All done! Anyone else?
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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121 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 310
Reviews: 121
Fri Mar 29, 2019 9:42 pm
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manilla says...



Hello! I am back again - Could you review part of this working prologue for a possible new story?

Thanks!

work/manilla/Argent--Prologue-11-143807#c668362
Pronouns: she/they

From the wild manila folder of YWS's office.

When the last tree has fallen
And the rivers are poisoned
You cannot eat money


I do reviews: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=188&t=108365
  





User avatar
876 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 24733
Reviews: 876
Fri Mar 29, 2019 10:12 pm
ShadowVyper says...



I'd be happy to, @manilla! Looks like that work is set to private, though :/ Could you make it public first? :D
"ur already a big kid scientist in my eyes" - veersies
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Tuck
"The chaos quad is here" - FireEyes

[she/they]
  





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164 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1451
Reviews: 164
Wed Apr 03, 2019 3:46 pm
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4revgreen says...



Hey, don't know if you are still accepting but my BONETAKER story currently only has 1 review so I would love some feedback on it! It's marked as Horror but there is nothing graphic save for the mention of a little bit of blood, but if that's not your cup of tea don't worry :-) It does mention religion but it's not my own view and one character is a christian themselves :-)
I also have some poetry I'd love reviewed- Solider, movement or monster, If you don't want to review the story.
Thanks so much for your time :-)
“The sight of one's own heart is degrading; people are not meant to look inward--that's why they've been give bodies, to hide their souls.”


― Shirley Jackson, The Sundial
  








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