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Should he love her before college? Or 4 years are too much?



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Fri Jan 21, 2011 8:28 pm
Gheala says...



Here is the thing: My protagonist just returned to his homeland, after he's lived in USA for most of his life. It's a romantic-thriller, but never mind the crime part now because my problem is with the romantic half.

Now, he's back to his homeland when he was eighteen years old and the girl he'll love is seventeen years old. They both finished high school and are going to college, but here is the problem: They were going to fall in love in that age, but then does that mean they'll get married during college?

I don't want them to get married during college, but being engaged or in love for four years is too much and almost boring. So, how am I to solve this? He's going to meet her before going to college, because he knows her father somehow, but should I delay the love? Does that mean I have to use the 'Two years later' phrases?

Do you have any suggestions? Any thoughts? I’m kind of going out of my mind.
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Fri Jan 21, 2011 8:50 pm
Tigersprite says...



Four years, in my opinion, is perfect. I say this because as you've mentioned, it may get boring. That is a very good opportunity to add some realism to your story, and present the strain of the relationship on both your protagonist and his fiancee. How has she fared while he's been away? Has she been tempted to cheat? Has she watched her friends marry or enter into fulfilling relationships while the most contact she's had with the love of her life is a phone call or quick letter? Do her parents (assuming they're a traditional sort who care who their daughter marries) chide her for being foolish enough to get engaged so young, and do her siblings and those aforementioned friends mock her because of the loneliness she's brought upon herself? Can you also apply these ideas and questions to your protagonist and show his reactions? What is it like to maintain a long-distance relationship?

If you could write about all of that (and without making it all angsty) then most certainly, being engaged/in love for four years wouldn't be a boring thing to write about. Hope that helps.

Tiger
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Fri Jan 21, 2011 8:59 pm
Elinor says...



Why not? A lot of couples are together for that period of time, some much longer, before they get engaged! I don't think it's boring at all. In fact, I think it says something about their relationship and how much they really love each other if they're able to stay together for so long. You'll have to include conflict and troubles like any relationship has, of course (refer to Tiger's advice). Maybe they can even split up for a time, get back together, and get married then.

What this depends on though, is how far you want to take their relationship with the story and how all of this is proportional the events of the novel. How long do his college years last? Are they over in a paragraph, or do they last for the entire novel? If it's the former I think you'll find it easy to keep them together; if it's the latter you can refer to the above. I would also consider how important to the novel that the marriage of these two characters will be. Is it at absolutely essential, or is it an afterthought toward the ending? Does the marriage seem to flow well with the plot? I was going through something similar where I was trying to work a marriage in of two characters from my novel, but then I realized it wasn't all that important and it didn't fit anywhere so I just cut it out -- your situation may be different, though.

Hope this helps!

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Sat Jan 22, 2011 9:50 pm
Lauren2010 says...



In my experience, when people go to college their high school relationships don't last very long. That's not to say that people who really love each other won't stay together, but maybe that would be something fun to play with? Relationships aren't perfect, are they're definitely hard, so some "time apart" could end up working well into your story (though I don't know, you're the one writing it after all ;)). Their love could be further cemented by coming back to each other, but of course that would work best in the situation that your novel focuses a lot on their college years. If college is a short part or barely mentioned, it may be better to just keep them together like Elinor said.

Hope I've helped!
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