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My story plot (sort of)



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Sun Apr 12, 2009 3:27 am
Tinkerballs says...



Hello,
Ive been thinking lately about an idea the formed in my head the other day. I've played around with it in my head a bit, but unfortunately I'm rubbish at forming plot ideas. Whenever I think up an idea it wither sounds too cliche to me or too boring. Here's what I have so far...

Setting
A war racked twilight-world that is always cold. Most of the time there is large amounts of snow. The cities are like huge eco-domes, but most of the population lives in extreme poverty. The cities are actually ruled by a race of God-Like Beings (GLB=God-Like Being, their name is undecided) the GLBs stage huge battles out in the tundra for entertainment. A translucent dome forms, then the army spawns inside it, then the two forces charge each other, and the battle goes on until everyone is dead. The GLBs also take part in the killing, but it is only a game to them and they prefer to watch. Also, each city that is ruled by a GLB has a shepherd, someone who is in charge of rounding up people to fight the battles.

Plot (so far)
The MC is having a hard time after her best friend goes missing after having a fight with her. It presumed suicide, and the MC feels extremely guilty. At this point I was thinking of her turning to drink or drugs, is that plausible? She often retreats to her favourite place, a hideaway near a level crossing (guess what happens next). One day (surprise surprise) she is hit by a train, and wakes up in another world (cliché, I know)! She is wearing boring grey clothes and has a pouch of her favourite food on her (I haven’t thought of what food it is yet). To her terror the MC witnesses a battle between two of the god like beings’ armies, which is over in an obscenely short amount of time. After the battle is over the two beings converse as if it was only a game. She wanders for an undecided period of time, and is stopped by a group of children around her age. They are all tall and beautiful with blonde hair and call themselves the Chosen. The MC notices that they have a pinkish aura (later she finds that things that are controlled by the GLBs have pinkish auras). They are the servants of the GLBs and came from different universes. Some came from the MCs world. She manages to escape them after they attack her, and she finds a city. From the distance it is a large dome that glows with an aqua marine aura. There she is almost caught by a shepherd and his troops, but is saved by a gang of people who call themselves the troggs. That’s kind of it. There is going to be something to do with them finding a city ruled by a huge renegade GLB. Also one character that comes from the real world falls in with a shepherd.

Sorry for the vague plotline :S

If anyone can help me think of a middle and ending, please do :) Also can anyone think of a more convincing way for her to die/reach the other world?

Thank you :)
  





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Wed Apr 22, 2009 6:57 pm
siobhan says...



You could have her meet someone from that world while she's wandering. Perhaps a deserter from one of the armies? He could be a boy if you wanted romance. Or a girl, I suppose, if she's a lesbian. Whatever. :)

If she's from a warm climate, especially, it could be hard for her to survive in the cold.

Perhaps her friend didn't kill herself - maybe she was kidnapped/recruited/whatever to be one of the beautiful servant girls, and she looks like a totally different person and doesn't remember the MC. It could open up a reason with what the girl wants to do in the world - to free her bestie from the GLB she serves. She could get in way over her head, perhaps meeting the Troggs again, if they're rebels, and falling in with them.

Or perhaps the MC herself was kidnapped to be a slave girl, and she has to escape before she's controlled?

I can't really figure out any other way for her to get there, other than dying. The way she dies is a little implausible, though. If she's strung out on drugs, she might not see the train coming, but if not, I feel like she would get out of the way.
You could do something a little Narnia inspired - she's at the crossing, or perhaps in her friend's room cleaning or reminiscing, and she finds an object or something that she picks up. She notices it seems strange, takes it home with her. If it's jewelry, she could put it on before going to sleep. And when she wakes up, she could be in the other world.
  








And on the pedestal these words appear:/'My name is Ozymandias, king of kings;/Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!'/Nothing beside remains.
— Percy Bysshe Shelley