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Which Summary is the Best?



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Tue Jul 04, 2017 3:12 pm
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Dest says...



Idk if this is the right place to put this but oh well

I wrote a story called Dreaded Dinner Party, and I wanted to know which summary/description sounds the most interesting.

@BlueAfrica @BiscuitsLeGuin (sorry to bother you guys! but since you two have read a bunch of the story I thought I'd tag you and get your opinions)

1. Aucuria "Curi" Andrews has struggled through too many of her parents' parties, and it looks as if it will stay that way unless someone makes trouble!

2. Aucuria “Curi” Andrews is a homeschooled girl who’s tired of her dinner party-throwing parents. Nothing seems set to change this latest dinner party until her parents’ reputation is challenged.

3. Aucuria “Curi” is the daughter of the well-known dinner party couple, the Andrews. For their latest party, they have invited most of the city including the mischievous Wolfeman, friendly Toki, and somewhat annoying but lovable Cooleo. Which would be fine, if the (their frenemies) Digi couple didn’t exist.

4. “So… Your mom and dad are throwing a dinner party…” Curi Andrews’s parents are self-defined party animals, but the arrival of a certain guest brings more trouble than usual.

5. Aucuria “Curi” Andrews is a homeschooled girl who’s tired of her dinner party-throwing parents. Nothing is set to change this latest party until a sabotage attempt and her parents’ reputation is challenged by a cartoonish nasty couple. It’s up to Curi to put a stop to the slander, meet some new faces along the way, such as the mischievous traveler Mister Wolfeman or ambitious Ophelia, and of course, eat some delicious food.
Last edited by Dest on Tue Jul 17, 2018 11:06 pm, edited 5 times in total.
  





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Tue Jul 04, 2017 5:10 pm
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Mageheart says...



Three and four sound the most interesting to me!
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Tue Jul 04, 2017 7:42 pm
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BluesClues says...



I think 2 sets up Curi's current life and the upcoming basic plot/plot problem nicely. 4 does pretty well, too, but I'd cut out the line of dialogue in it. And it's more vague, I think, so 2 is probably a bit better.
  





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Tue Jul 04, 2017 7:56 pm
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Virgil says...



I have to agree with BlueAfrica here on the choices. 2 and 4 are the strongest pitches here. The dialogue makes the fourth feel more awkward, so I enjoyed the second the most. This introduces the character's life currently and how it's going to change in the future, so I'm going to say 2.

1 is weak because of the wording and it isn't very descriptive with 'parents' parties' and 3 isn't all that strong because it feels the need to introduce all the main characters and it's too descriptive. 2 is that balance for me, so yes, I like 2 the best.

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Tue Jul 04, 2017 9:23 pm
Dest says...



Thanks guys for your explanations! So far, 2 seems to be the best choice
  





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Thu Jul 06, 2017 7:01 am
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Redbox275 says...



Hi there,

Mind if I weigh in?

Aucuria "Curi" Andrews has struggled through too many of her parents' parties, and it looks as if it will stay that way unless someone makes trouble!
.

I kind of like how this eludes to wacky fun adventures and how short it is. I would say, though, that "it looks as if it will stay that way" like is a little wordy.

2. Aucuria “Curi” Andrews is a homeschooled girl who’s tired of her dinner party-throwing parents. Nothing seems set to change this latest dinner party until her parents’ reputation is challenged.


I think this may be the weakest one because from what I read Curi's homeschool status on isn't a core appeal. I only read two chapters, so I don't know how much ring hoemschool has an affect on the story. Also, "dinner party" is a little repetitive and the passive tense in the second sentence makes the sentence awkward. The wording is the weakest part, but I like this structure of this is the MC's life and this is how it changed.

3. Aucuria “Curi” is the daughter of the well-known dinner party couple, the Andrews. For their latest party, they have invited most of the city including the mischievous Wolfeman, friendly Toki, and somewhat annoying but lovable Cooleo. Which would be fine, if the (their frenemies) Digi couple didn’t exist.


I like this one. The little character descriptions were cute. I may change the adjective "friendly" into something more compelling, but hey, I could be wrong. Then it implies at the end that despite the colorful characters there is trouble with the Digi couple.

4. “So… Your mom and dad are throwing a dinner party…” Curi Andrews’s parents are self-defined party animals, but the arrival of a certain guest brings more trouble than usual.


Hmm, the dialogue snippet isn't really that interesting. it doesn't spark curiosity. It's a little too vague. You don't want to give too much away, but I feel like you did better sparking interest in the previous summaries.

Advice I would give for making a summary is find the most unique and appealing element and lead with that. I also advice more concise summariess as well.

I would say my favorite is the third but consider combining the strength of your other summaries into one really strong one.
  





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Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:24 pm
Dest says...



@Redbox275 thanks for giving me your thoughts! It helps a lot
  








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