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Young Writers Society


I'm two chapters in and already want to rewrite?!?!?!



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Sat Apr 18, 2015 3:41 am
TheArchon says...



I hate the way my main character talks and thinks in the first chapter! I know it's just Pokemon fanfiction, but seriously?! His responses and thoughts are so cliche. For example, in a flashback to when his father is murdered, Thomas instantly makes it his duty to find his father's murder and kill him. This is him as a nine year old.

Thomas accepts Neo, another main character, upon first meeting him. He doesn't think to himself "Perhaps this guy shouldn't be trusted so quickly. I better pass on his offer to travel with me..."
He just says "Sure. Why not? The more the marrier!"

Thomas seems to have no flaws and pisses me off! It's my fault, though. I feel so bad for writing his character like this. He's amazing in my mind, but I don't know how to write characters at all.

Should I rewrite part of the first chapter? Last year, I rewrote the first chapter so much that I hated it! It's a year later, but I don't want to suck out the fun again. I don't want to continue with this bad of a character. I started writing the story two years ago, but when 9th grade came along everything went downhill. Any advice?
Wibbly wobbley time-wimey stuff
  





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Sat Apr 18, 2015 3:51 am
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Vervain says...



Advice: Change the character, if you're so sick of him.

The simple facts are, you are the writer. Yes, there is a degree to which your characters are human, etc. etc., but there's also a huge degree where you can sit down and say "no, you shouldn't act like that, that's not in your characterization, you'll respond like this instead". You are the one holding the pen, and you're ultimately the one who decides what goes on the paper.

If you don't like how Thomas reacts to his father's murder, then change it. If you don't like how he reacts to Neo, change it. Give him a different reaction, see how it fits him, tweak his characterization a bit to see if it still fits.

If you don't like how his inner narration sounds, change it. This might be a little more difficult, because it ties into writing style, but there are a lot of opportunities for you to mess around with your writing style and find ways of writing that work for you.

You don't "have" to write any particular way, but if you don't like your writing style, work to change it and find a way that suits you better.

As for Thomas not having any flaws, you just pointed out two really big character flaws in the issues you're having with him: He's obviously stubborn and dedicated to finding the person who killed his father, and he's trusting of strangers, which can both definitely get him into a tight spot. The first one can manifest as stubbornness, as single-mindedness, as tunnel vision, as any number of things where all roads lead to "I must find that person"; the second can literally get him killed, depending on who he trusts so blindly.
stay off the faerie paths
  





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Sat Apr 18, 2015 4:14 am
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Pretzelstick says...



I know how it feels to hate your character. I think that you just need to get into his head and just think how he thinks and feel like he feels. Then you have to express that characterization on paper.
Just like the PP @Arkhaion suggested that you change him. I just wanted to add that IRL people change all the time, and even sometimes in the middle of their life. You could either rewrite this whole character or have something change him [like a traumatic experience, a persons wise words, or really anything]
If you feel like you need to rewrite it, then do so, but remember to learn from your previous mistakes. Do not suck the fun out of it, just make it fun, by maybe comparing how much Thomas changed.

Anyways that's my advice and I hope it helps!
A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. The man who never reads only lives once
~George R. Martin

Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about recreating yourself. ~George B. Shaw

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