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So I have never told my mom that I want to be a writer...



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Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:07 am
TheArchon says...



I have never told my mom that I want to be a writer. I've never even brought up writing fiction at all! I'm scared to tell her, and I need advice on how to.

My plans for the future differ from my mon's very much. She wants me to go to college in Texas, and her plans for me are not very big. However, ever since last summer, I want to do things out of the ordinary. I want to attend an out-of-state college with a reputable creative writing program. There are so many things I want to do, but I'm afraid that my mom doesn't give much thought to them. I'm even considering attending a summer program for young writers (but might not due to cost). How am I supposed to do all these things, though, when my mom doesn't even know that I want to be a fiction writer?!

I'm scared to tell her and don't know how to, but I know that I will have to soon. How should I tell her that I want to be a writer?
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:22 am
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Rosendorn says...



One thing I will say: you don't need a creative writing degree to be a fiction writer, and in fact it could be helpful to not get a creative writing degree if you want to be a fiction writer. Don't discount other programs because you think they won't help— they will. They'll teach you about things that will make it into your writing and generally give you a broader base to work from. Creative writing teaches you how to write creatively, yes, but it's a very small pool of information to pull from.

If you're scared about it, start off slow. You can bring up the idea of summer plans and saying you saw this interesting opportunity as something "different". She doesn't have to know you've been writing fiction for awhile.

Depending on how she reacts to the idea of you attending a creative writing program, you can judge how well she'll take the idea of you being a writer.

There's also a certain amount of unfortunate reality: writing fiction is hard to make a living off of. This is another reason I suggested not to get a creative writing degree: you can use the degree to both richen your writing and support yourself while you establish yourself as a writer.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:47 am
Apricity says...



My circumstance is very similar to yours, except my parents know I want to be a writer but circumstances won't allow it. So, I'm going after Med after high school. Though here's something I've learnt along the way. Adding onto what Rosey said, you don't need to attend so call creative writing classes or even major in English to become a writer. A lot of authors such as Haruki Murakami all actually have jobs outside of writing, only when their books earn an income that's enough to sustain them do they go into professional writing.

What makes every writer different to each other? It won't be the classes they attend or how to structure a plot or how to develope characters. It will be their experience in life that shapes their voice and story. I'm not saying that going to a creative writing based college is a bad idea, but I think you should also think about broadening your horizons a little. You can always write, no one will stop you from that and maybe one day, who knows you might get published and become a full time writer.

As for your mother, I would drop hints here and there slowly. Don't just rush in and go wham, 'Mum, I wanna be a writer and I'm gonna ditch everything else'. Bring up the idea in a questioning tone, preferably when she's in a good mood and ask her opinion on the prospect of being a writer. It won't hurt to show her some of your work, my mother relented a bit when she realized how passionate I am with my writing and my mothe is as strict as you can get.

When you do tell her, tell us how it goes, and if there's a problem, we will try and help you. ^ ^

Best of luck!
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 1:11 am
TheArchon says...



Thank you so much Rosendorn and Flite for replying!!!!! I forgot to mention that I'm also interested in gettin a PhD in Literature and teaching at the university level. It will be pretty hard, considering the fact that my reading and writing skills are rubbish.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 1:58 am
Rosendorn says...



Ahhh, being a university teacher does change things! I would still suggest to get a minor in something else and to really research your possibilities, because you don't need a really expensive program to get an awesome education. In fact, you can get a better education through smaller universities because you have more one on one time with the profs.
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

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Sat Jan 17, 2015 3:46 am
TheArchon says...



But then again, aren't the best smaller universities private ones? Private universities tend to be more expensive.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 4:03 am
Vervain says...



Actually -- to interject -- the university I'm looking to transfer to (a public university inside of my home state) is smaller than the private universities I was looking at in my senior year of high school. There are plenty of small state universities.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 4:30 am
TheArchon says...



Arkhaion wrote:Actually -- to interject -- the university I'm looking to transfer to (a public university inside of my home state) is smaller than the private universities I was looking at in my senior year of high school. There are plenty of small state universities.

Which university are you transferring to, if I may ask?
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 4:32 am
TheArchon says...



Rosendorn wrote:Ahhh, being a university teacher does change things! I would still suggest to get a minor in something else and to really research your possibilities, because you don't need a really expensive program to get an awesome education. In fact, you can get a better education through smaller universities because you have more one on one time with the profs.

As for what to minor in, should I minor in another field that interests me? My main other interests are psychology and philosophy. I also like history, but I wouldn't want to minor it.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 4:44 am
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RacheDrache says...



I agree with those before me! But, I have the added advantage of having been in your position once upon a time, so what I have to add is based on practical experience.

Like you, I wanted (and still want) to be a writer for a living. I also wanted to attend a writing camp, and I was set on studying Creative Writing at one of the many private little colleges. Despite my parents wishes, I also wanted to go out and away for college. Wherever had the program I liked best.

I ended up staying in state because of finances and some complicated family things. I've long since graduated from that college, and while I'm happy with the education I got, I regret that I didn't go out of state. I don't think I would have regretted going out of state. College is a time to discover who you are and make some of the most wonderful friends. A new environment is the best place for that, I think.

As for my college education itself, I have no regrets. I ended up going into college as an Anthropology major. Why? To enrichen my writing with Stuff. As Rosen said, you learn to write creatively in college, but you can learn that without being a CW major, and learn other things instead that'll give you things to write about.

I discovered Linguistics, which was the amazing fit for me ever. It combined my love of language with my ability to think analytically and was just the greatest. I'm a much better writer and storyteller because of it.

To get a PhD in Literature, you don't necessarily need to start out as any particular major. Anything in the arts and humanities would lend itself well down the path. You could major in... Classical Studies in undergrad, English for grad school, and still become a PhD Literature.

I guess my overall point is: don't feel combined by anyone's expectations, including yours. Go where your heart tells you. Explore anything that interests you. In a writing group I belong to, we have someone who is nearly done with *medical school* and is a wonderful writer. We have someone who majored in film studies and works in video media and is a marvelous writer. We have me, the linguist who works in animal rescue and is going to go to grad school to become a teacher, and I'm a good writer. Then there's the writer in an actual MFA Creative Writing program and is a brilliant writer. Finally, the one who didn't go to college at all and is a genius writer!

There are no right or wrong paths to writerdom. Except maybe the ones who don't involve writing.

As for telling tu madre, that's entirely up to you. My folks are vaguely aware that I write, but they rarely if ever read what I write and I'm as secretive as heck about it, which drives them nuts. It's not something I talk about except with writer friends who I've vetted.

And if writing comes up in a conversation, I scope people out still. Are they real writers, or just casual hobbiests?

Good luck!

Rache
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 5:00 am
Vervain says...



After Rache's waycool long reply (<3) I'd like to answer your question, as I'm looking to transfer fairly far away from my home -- I live in Florida, so I'd be transferring either to UCF (University of Central Florida) or UNF (University of North Florida). I'm constrained to public Florida universities due to money issues, so I've done a fair amount of research into which I'd like to attend.
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 6:11 am
TheArchon says...



Arkhaion wrote:After Rache's waycool long reply (<3) I'd like to answer your question, as I'm looking to transfer fairly far away from my home -- I live in Florida, so I'd be transferring either to UCF (University of Central Florida) or UNF (University of North Florida). I'm constrained to public Florida universities due to money issues, so I've done a fair amount of research into which I'd like to attend.

Sorry that you're constrained to public Florida universities. I hope everything goes well and thanks for replying!!!!! :D
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 6:12 am
TheArchon says...



RacheDrache wrote:I agree with those before me! But, I have the added advantage of having been in your position once upon a time, so what I have to add is based on practical experience.

Like you, I wanted (and still want) to be a writer for a living. I also wanted to attend a writing camp, and I was set on studying Creative Writing at one of the many private little colleges. Despite my parents wishes, I also wanted to go out and away for college. Wherever had the program I liked best.

I ended up staying in state because of finances and some complicated family things. I've long since graduated from that college, and while I'm happy with the education I got, I regret that I didn't go out of state. I don't think I would have regretted going out of state. College is a time to discover who you are and make some of the most wonderful friends. A new environment is the best place for that, I think.

As for my college education itself, I have no regrets. I ended up going into college as an Anthropology major. Why? To enrichen my writing with Stuff. As Rosen said, you learn to write creatively in college, but you can learn that without being a CW major, and learn other things instead that'll give you things to write about.

I discovered Linguistics, which was the amazing fit for me ever. It combined my love of language with my ability to think analytically and was just the greatest. I'm a much better writer and storyteller because of it.

To get a PhD in Literature, you don't necessarily need to start out as any particular major. Anything in the arts and humanities would lend itself well down the path. You could major in... Classical Studies in undergrad, English for grad school, and still become a PhD Literature.

I guess my overall point is: don't feel combined by anyone's expectations, including yours. Go where your heart tells you. Explore anything that interests you. In a writing group I belong to, we have someone who is nearly done with *medical school* and is a wonderful writer. We have someone who majored in film studies and works in video media and is a marvelous writer. We have me, the linguist who works in animal rescue and is going to go to grad school to become a teacher, and I'm a good writer. Then there's the writer in an actual MFA Creative Writing program and is a brilliant writer. Finally, the one who didn't go to college at all and is a genius writer!

There are no right or wrong paths to writerdom. Except maybe the ones who don't involve writing.

As for telling tu madre, that's entirely up to you. My folks are vaguely aware that I write, but they rarely if ever read what I write and I'm as secretive as heck about it, which drives them nuts. It's not something I talk about except with writer friends who I've vetted.

And if writing comes up in a conversation, I scope people out still. Are they real writers, or just casual hobbiests?

Good luck!

Rache

Thank you so much for this long reply!!! When you studied linguistics, did you study any other languages?
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Sat Jan 17, 2015 6:38 am
Monsters says...



One, life is too short to live for anyone else other then yourself. When you make a big choice do not ask anyone other then yourself unless you want their input in order for you to weigh your options. Don't follow bland advice or a blatant stating of your future, or you will live regrettably. While your mom may or may not have more wisdom; it is your choice regardless. In the end, you need to be polite about it but also, straight up and honest with her.

Now if you decide to tell her this and choose this option it wouldn't hurt to have a plan, a backup plan and a plan behind that. This will help her and you sleep at night. I can almost promise you that you are in for a hard, rough time if you get a degree in creative writing. After you are 30,000+- dollars in debt. how could you possibly pay it off and live an okay life with a degree which is not in demand in the business world? These are the types of critical things you honestly need to have planned before you choose this major path in your life. Most parents, when this informed choice of yours is thought to actually work will be okay with the choice, but honestly I cannot think of a scenario in which this type of criticism can be met logically. What you have to do if you cannot come up with a plan is just be honest, show some maturity and tell them.

In a world where all information is on the internet, why not choose an English degree instead of creative writing? This way you can become a teacher and pursue creative writing on the side; of which is very fun but usually will not pay the bills in a society that we live in today.

Food for thought.
  





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Wed Jan 21, 2015 1:55 pm
TheArchon says...



RacheDrache wrote:I agree with those before me! But, I have the added advantage of having been in your position once upon a time, so what I have to add is based on practical experience.

Like you, I wanted (and still want) to be a writer for a living. I also wanted to attend a writing camp, and I was set on studying Creative Writing at one of the many private little colleges. Despite my parents wishes, I also wanted to go out and away for college. Wherever had the program I liked best.

I ended up staying in state because of finances and some complicated family things. I've long since graduated from that college, and while I'm happy with the education I got, I regret that I didn't go out of state. I don't think I would have regretted going out of state. College is a time to discover who you are and make some of the most wonderful friends. A new environment is the best place for that, I think.

As for my college education itself, I have no regrets. I ended up going into college as an Anthropology major. Why? To enrichen my writing with Stuff. As Rosen said, you learn to write creatively in college, but you can learn that without being a CW major, and learn other things instead that'll give you things to write about.

I discovered Linguistics, which was the amazing fit for me ever. It combined my love of language with my ability to think analytically and was just the greatest. I'm a much better writer and storyteller because of it.

To get a PhD in Literature, you don't necessarily need to start out as any particular major. Anything in the arts and humanities would lend itself well down the path. You could major in... Classical Studies in undergrad, English for grad school, and still become a PhD Literature.

I guess my overall point is: don't feel combined by anyone's expectations, including yours. Go where your heart tells you. Explore anything that interests you. In a writing group I belong to, we have someone who is nearly done with *medical school* and is a wonderful writer. We have someone who majored in film studies and works in video media and is a marvelous writer. We have me, the linguist who works in animal rescue and is going to go to grad school to become a teacher, and I'm a good writer. Then there's the writer in an actual MFA Creative Writing program and is a brilliant writer. Finally, the one who didn't go to college at all and is a genius writer!

There are no right or wrong paths to writerdom. Except maybe the ones who don't involve writing.

As for telling tu madre, that's entirely up to you. My folks are vaguely aware that I write, but they rarely if ever read what I write and I'm as secretive as heck about it, which drives them nuts. It's not something I talk about except with writer friends who I've vetted.

And if writing comes up in a conversation, I scope people out still. Are they real writers, or just casual hobbiests?

Good luck!

Rache

A lot of people, including my dad, have told me that what college you attend undergraduate does not matter in the long run. Is that true? If so, then why do so many people aspire to go to such expensive schools if the education is, according to then, all the same?
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