z

Young Writers Society


A little too much EM-pha-SIS?



User avatar
276 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 16802
Reviews: 276
Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:19 pm
rosette says...



Heyo!

I'm currently working on this ridonkulous short, which most likely will not be a national bestseller, but I had a question on my MC, anyway. Because this could also pertain to future works of mine.

MC is a loud, hearty, booming-voice kind of man. He's not a salesman, but he's attempting to be one in the story. I feel a little lost on what to do as far as his speech, though. The way I picture his conversation with person-he-is-trying-to-sell-to, he's not talking normal, but only emphasizing certain syllables.

Say, at one point in the talk he goes, "But this is AB-sa-LUTE-ly perfect for you!" I don't know if that's proper to do during the WHOLE talk, and besides, it might become tiring to read. But would a few words like that be okay to throw in? Italicizing absolutely, and writing it like I did above produce two different effects, and the way my man is talking, only the former is right in my head.

But is that proper? Too distracting or weird?

I'd love to hear some tips and thoughts on this! :)
On earth I long to be like Him
  





User avatar
1272 Reviews



Gender: Other
Points: 89625
Reviews: 1272
Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:56 pm
View Likes
Rosendorn says...



Italics and tags.

Spelling out accents phonologically is really annoying, and can actually make the story unreadable for people who struggle to read (like dyslexics). If you write out "he said, emphasizing every other word", or "he made sure to put on his sales pitch voice" and you've spent some time describing it before, that's plenty good to get the point across.
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.
  








She conquered her demons and wore her scars like wings.
— Atticus