Young Writers Society

How do I fatten up my paragraphs? I've tried fluff, but that doesn't work; I get stuck. I look at them, and I feel like I'll get a paper cut if I touch one.

Writing nonstop? Sure. But I know I've punched the "enter" key too many times if my longest paragraph is three-four lines. Are there any specific methods for ... this kind of thing?

Can you give us a sample of your writing, just so we can get a better idea what your style's like?

I seem to lean toward short paragraphs as well. I don't think it's necessarily a problem unless the short paragraphs are breaking up things that should be in the same paragraph.

Short paragraphs are also easier to read on the Internet, so that's something to keep in mind.

Thanks for the replies! ^.^

Ah, definitely; they're easier to read. But at the same time, they affect the pace, or that's just me? When I'm tossing in more detail, so as to slow things down, I feel like it's not doing anything, that it'll read fast regardless.

How short is too short? Where do I combine? They say it's instinct, but...

For instance, do I break here...

The young woman next door taught her. Willow. Willow kept a small garden, a checkerboard of pink and white roses. They visited it every weekday and sat and talked, alternating smoothly between English and Latin.

Sometimes they talked philosophical, or political, or sociological. Sometimes the newest Pringle. It didn't matter; their interests clicked like jigsaw pieces.

...or do I not break at all?

The young woman next door taught her. Willow. Willow kept a small garden, a checkerboard of pink and white roses. They visited it every weekday and sat and talked, alternating smoothly between English and Latin. Sometimes they talked philosophical, or political, or sociological. Sometimes the newest Pringle. It didn't matter; their interests clicked like jigsaw pieces.

This may seem like a fluff reply to you, Goldflame, but I will try to be as helpful as I can here.

I have read and reviewed all of your works that you posted on Cobra's Cage. And during that time, I have never thought to myself, She is using too many breaks in the paragraphs. Just a thought there.

I always think of a paragraph as a long sentence. You write it as an individual thought. And individual idea. You know that once that idea has been expressed, and you begin another idea, its just writing protocol to begin another paragraph.
So the only way that you can make your writing seem less "fluffy" or drifting, like your ideas just flit about, is draw out those paragraphs somewhat. Take the idea and extrapolate on it a little more.
Like in that last paragraph you showed us, you could talk a little longer on how they talked. What they talked about, etc.

By the way, I love your: It didn't matter; their interests clicked like jigsaw pieces. That was amazing.

From the sample of writing, I think that your paragraphing had no issues. But if you still think so, then I hope that this helps a little bit.

Thanks! That helped loads.

So I was stalking the forums and I came across this ...

Must reply, yersh.

Okay, so first off: You don't need to fatten your paras for the sake of fattening them. Sure, they look nice when they're published, but they can often be taxing to read through if the narrator is blabbering about an idea but isn't really building up on anything. I personally prefer varying paragraph length, and the "to divide or not to divide?" question is one that I ask myself quite frequently whenever I'm scrutinizing a work of mine--or anyone else's, for that matter.

There's only one thing I can say, and that's that if short paras suit your style, then go for it. You can't force style, just like you can't force rivers not to flow downstream. It's instinctive, I think, and really depends on you. Paragraphs are flighty things, and sometimes they linger uselessly. In that case, you shouldn't be afraid to cut whole chunks out. Yes, it gives you a funny achy feeling, but if it's useless then it doesn't belong. This is more of a sentence thing than a paragraph thing, though, so ...

Let's talk about paragraphs. Like sentences consist of cause and effect (or, y'know, subject and predicate), paragraphing is like building a brick wall. The sentences are bricks. If you have a brick missing in the structure, it topples over. A group of ideas clustered together, yet their basic purpose is the same. So take a look at the topic under discussion. As long as the topic doesn't change, you don't switch paras. (Unless it's dialogue of course. Even then, it's a stylistic choice. Some people prefer not to break dialogue away from the main paragraph.)

Like red bricks are used to build a red wall, and purple for purple. Wouldn't a purple wall look odd if it was built using red bricks? I realize I might be straying off topic here ...

Take your paragraph above for example. You're talking about the main character meeting a woman called Willow and everything that they talked about, all that they discussed. You don't really need a paragraph break at "Sometimes" since you haven't introduced a new idea; rather, it's a continuation, a build-up of that same idea. Supposing you started talking about something else instead, switched to a certain time or focused on a conversation/scene in your story: You'd start a new para.

Some cases where you could break up paragraphs:

For laying emphasis.

Lobster had always been a special child. Everyone in Rossendale knew as much, for Bertha Littlechild considered it her duty to remind her neighbours at least twice a week; and her neighbours to tell their neighbours, and so on and so forth until even the beggar man by the creek talked of, "That shpecial child that attends them school fer the gifted."

You see, Lobster Littlechild was both blind and deaf.

He was also the smartest child alive, or so Bertha claimed.

While switching perspectives.

Harmon J. Lewis was not a good neighbour. For one, he never washed his front porch, and it was forever littered with "cat poop, bird poop and jus' some more poop" as little Tommy affirmed, having been sent over with a home-made apple pie and greetings from the Rivers' homestead. Needless to say, Tommy had come home gasping for breath and vowing never to set foot in Harmon J. Lewis' house ever again.

Privately, Mrs Rivers thought that Tommy was making a ruckus for no legitimate reason and decided to visit Mr Lewis herself.

Besides, she told herself sternly, it is not proper that we shouldn't call on him. The poor man has been here for a week, and we are his closest neighbours.

When talking about/focusing on a new time or scene (I hope you don't mind that I'm using your paragraph for this one.)

GoldFlame wrote:The young woman next door taught her. Willow. Willow kept a small garden, a checkerboard of pink and white roses. They visited it every weekday and sat and talked, alternating smoothly between English and Latin.Sometimes they talked philosophical, or political, or sociological. Sometimes the newest Pringle. It didn't matter; their interests clicked like jigsaw pieces.

It was one blustery evening, however, halfway through August, that Lily ventured to ask her of her childhood ...

You can also check these sites out if you want.

Hope this helped!

~P

You both--so amazing. Thank you!!!

Feed them lots of cookies.