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Young Writers Society


Weaving description into the narrative.



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Fri Apr 18, 2014 9:48 pm
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Gardevite says...



I'm writing a short story at the moment for a local/regional competition. My main problem is the fact that my story is very dialogue heavy. I know what the setting looks like, but I'm having trouble weaving the description into the narrative without it feeling forced or awkward. Does anyone have any tips?
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Fri Apr 18, 2014 10:03 pm
Rosendorn says...



Work it around the dialogue. Have people notice things in the area, lean against things, use the scenery.

Also, accept that you don't have to describe the setting. If you can't work it in naturally, that's okay! Not all stories need everything described. People might not see the setting exactly the same way you do, but that's a part of writing.
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.
  





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Fri Apr 18, 2014 10:20 pm
Gardevite says...



Thank you Rosey, you're a saint. Do you have any tips on fleshing out writing in general? I'm not hitting the word count minimum. :(
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Fri Apr 18, 2014 11:36 pm
Rosendorn says...



How omniscient are you? Ie- do you spend a lot of time in one character's head, or mostly just watch what happens?
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.
  





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Fri Apr 18, 2014 11:44 pm
Gardevite says...



I have the first draft finished in an omniscient past tense narrative, but I'm going to change it to a first-person past tense narrative.
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Sat Apr 19, 2014 1:41 am
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Rosendorn says...



You don't need to change it to first person to get introspection! Third person has a lot of room for it.

Try pausing between moments of dialogue to allow for reflection. Have people notice body language and fill the silence with describing it. People can often say more with how they're sitting and shifting than anything.

Also, try going for multiple senses— what people hear, smell, feel, taste.

The most profound parts of a story happen in silence, in quiet. They occur when people are watching.

Don't be afraid to slow the story down. First or third person doesn't change how introspective the character is— that's up to you.
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.
  





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Mon Dec 08, 2014 3:09 am
smanske15 says...



Another helpful hint I've come across is this: Give every single person in your story a positive and a negative. It will help round out your characters. For example, give your hero something that makes us doubt him. In "The House of the Scorpion" the main character, Matt, is accused of killing a dog. Then give the villain a redeeming quality, something that makes us think, 'hey, this guy might not be all that bad.' This works best when we can sympathize with the character. So in "The Avengers" we know that Loki feels betrayed by his father, and he takes it out on Thor (and pretty much everyone else on Earth).
  





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Mon Dec 08, 2014 4:40 am
Rosendorn says...



I'm going to take the above one step farther.

Make lists of traits, not "positive" and "negative".

So often, we hear "give your villains redeeming qualities" and "give your hero flaws", when that just leads to people going "well I'll give them a phobia here and an awesome ability there done" when that's not what the advice really means.

The advice means your villain will sometimes do good things. They will inadvertently help the hero. They are nice people. You can have them use their terrible skills— manipulation, ruthlessness, lust— and these traits actually lead to good things. You can also have the hero's so called good qualities lead them astray— loyal, but doesn't know when to cut ties. Honest, but unable to lie and therefore useless for hiding information. Charming, but not everybody believes them and it leads to accusations of manipulation.

Every single trait your character has, regardless of whether or not you've labeled it "positive" or "negative", can get them both in and out of trouble. Not everyone will see being charming as a good thing. Not everyone will see being ruthless as a bad thing.

In order to write you must detach yourself from your own moral compass and instead insert yourself into the moral compass of dozens of other people. They will not have yours. Good people, good aligned characters, will have potentially contradictory views to yours. Bad people, evil aligned characters, will have potentially similar views to yours.

You have to realize it's not the views and traits that make characters good, but how they use them that makes them good. You also have to realize that "good" is not universal, nor is "bad". Some cultures would be absolutely horrified that Americans send their children off to live on their own at 18 and expect them to be self sufficient then, because these cultures are into multigenerational families and you stay home for life.

Every personality trait is neutral, and they should be treated as such.
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.
  








The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names.
— Chinese proverb