A nice joke speech!

19 posts1, 2
User avatar
Gender Male
Points 625
Reviews 286
4 score and seven years ago, I-...What? I'm not becoming president of the US? I'm becoming the manager of burger king? Alright! Close enough!

I am so glad to be named the burger king. I plan to slash prices and up quality of burgers! *cough* suck it McDonalds *cough* Larger fries! And a better eating environment.
As the burger king... I'd like to thank Wendy's, for? Letting us take their customers!
And my mom, for giving me money to eat here! Also, I'd like to thank the burger emperor, for making me manager!
I am the burger king! Woo!
Thanks for coming everyone, oh, and order something or I'll call the police for loitering! Thank you come again! Heheh.
Last edited by silented1 on Tue Mar 22, 2011 3:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
[quote]If it's arguable, then it probably is." - Xeriana X

Link to my will review for food thread: topic71713.html




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 49345
Reviews 547
Okay, for one, McDonalds is way better than Burger King. And so is Wendy's. Burger King's burgers taste like... nothing!

Get your facts straight! :)
hehe

Classy




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 11542
Reviews 426
Hmm... do I critique this? ;)

It's funny, but it needs more context. I actually see this as fitting in really well in a larger story with pot-smoking hippies. Kind of like Wayne and Garth in Wayne's World; random, crazy, and not really making any sense. Yet, funny.




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 577
Reviews 198
You get what you pay for at BK.

I'm not going to crit, this by the way. Seeing as it's a joke. Unless you were really trying for some satire and want the criticism. :)
"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." — Einstein




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 23443
Reviews 193
Hello!

I liked this, I'm not going to critique this because thats not what its there for..? It is just there to entertain :D And it did. Though I have to agree that Wendys is better than Burger King, I'm not so keen on McDonalds though.

Anyways, it was entertaining *Likes* so Well Done!!

Keep Writing
~Lydia
Thinking about what you COULD achieve will get you no where. You've got to chase your dreams.
http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=188&t=92400 - Need a review?




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 7596
Reviews 287
Well I for one think Burger King tastes way better than McDonalds and Wendys. I agree with Nate, you should make this into a pointless story like Jay and Silent Bob. It would be funny, but also an enormous waste of time.
I am not addicted to reading, I can quit as soon as I finish one more chapter.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 1802
Reviews 261
I've no idea how BK is like in the States or Wendy's or McDonald's... but in my country, McDonald's is gross. Wendy's is too expensive and BK is heaven. Love their sundae.<3
All that I'm after is a life full of laughter, as long as I'm laughing with you.:)




User avatar
Gender None specified
Points 37290
Reviews 367
Eddie. XD.
Always making everyone laugh. Lol.
Like me. Right now. Except...Wendys totally owns BK, as well as McD's. But...they're all quite fattening. *wonders* Did I really just say that? I'm starting to sound...un-American. Anyhoo...
This is funny. Nice.
-Rainie ;)
"Chase your dreams, and remember me, speak bravery,
Because after all, those wings will take you up so high."
-- Owl City, "To the Sky"
✯ ✯ ✯




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 625
Reviews 286
LAWL! Thank you nate! =]] And eve liked mah everyone =] Hehe I am so glod you liked mah jokeeee. =]
[quote]If it's arguable, then it probably is." - Xeriana X

Link to my will review for food thread: topic71713.html




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 1030
Reviews 1260
Hey Edith! I hate to be the annoying reviewer who drops in and actually gives you a serious review, but hey, it should help you in the long run, right? ;)

I know this a joke, but maybe you could write it out as a short piece so that the narrator is actually reading the speech. The main reason that you would do this would be to see the reactions of other characters. Are they trying not to laugh? Just add a little meat to the sturdy bone of this story and you'll be great. PM me if you have any questions!

All our dreams can come true — if we have the courage to pursue them.

-- Walt Disney




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 4054
Reviews 27
It seems too goofy to be funny, but not totally goofy enough to be funny because it isn't funny. You get me?
Spoiler
I like people thinking that I have something so scandalous to say that I put it in spoiler tags, and I'm sorry that because of this selfish desire you were roped into reading this for not real lasting value.




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 625
Reviews 286
Critiq wrote:It seems too goofy to be funny, but not totally goofy enough to be funny because it isn't funny. You get me?

Dieeee!!! Lol joking, yeah I hear you man.
[quote]If it's arguable, then it probably is." - Xeriana X

Link to my will review for food thread: topic71713.html




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 805
Reviews 336
This was funny but a bit short. My favorite part *cough* suck it mcdonalds *cough*

ooooooh burn :) And wendy's is da bomb man but Bk is not as fattenign as Mickey D's and not as healthy as my man...or wait lady(?) Wendy's. So BK keeps balance. Like that thing with the fishes forgot their names. This kinda reminded me of the clerk in Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. This has nothing to do with it but it reminded me of it. Write more of this please. Like have someone throw a packet of ketchup at the narrator and have the narrator say You have to pay for that or something. I dunno :)

~Jasmine Bells~
Peace, Love, Writing and Insanity
I am nothing
but a mouthful of 'sorry's, half-hearted
apologies that roll of my tongue, smoothquick, like 'r's
or maybe like pocket candy
that's just a bit too sweet.

~*~




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 4300
Reviews 111
Lol, Eddeh, lol.

I, too, have no intention of reviewing. I just dropped by to let you know I had my first ever Burger King last night, and McDonald's pwns. But I'm glad you're slashing prices. The service station BK that exists between my city and Bradford is so expensive most of our 14-strong group decided to go ahead and starve instead.
"Ruth.
She's alive because she is not dead,
and junk."
~JoJo




Random avatar
Gender None specified
Points 2784
Reviews 16
Hey manager! Nice speech! You really should write comedy strips, lots of people will be in tears and stitches. Though I must admit, I was a bit dissapointed. Your title made me expect to roar with laughter and all I did was have this huge grin. Still good work. I advice you put it all together, and get rid of all the rough edges.
Happy writing!



Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!
— Dr. Seuss