Nightlyowl

That was pretty good, I liked it and want to know what happens to him, does her father kill him? The only thing I would say, is this, every time ...

I really loved this, I think its perfect the way it is. I can't believe its this good as a rough draft, I mean when I write a poem I ...

Sitting in the chair she wondered what people would say if they asked about what happen to the vacuum cleaner. I also think you should re check for run ons. ...

I also really liked this one. I only ahve one question, wasn't Ben the guy who beat her in the Prologe? And saved her in chapter 1? Well anyway there ...

I'd love to read more of this. I'm wondering what is her reality and wondering if he will have some reason for her discomfort. I watch a lot of shows ...

Once again did I find myself reflecting on how they could do this without a pilot or any sort of guidance at all. I don't think that sounds right. I ...

Hi there. First I want to say that I like it very much and can't wait to read the next chapter. It was as I stepped into the dangerous darkness ...

Wow... that was great... depressing but great. The only thing I have to say about it is that you repeated a word: The reaction was only two cars cars ahead ...

I know you want feedback on your characters, not your plot so I would like to point out that 6 feet tall isn't all that towering to a girl around ...

I agree to some degree with Drawer. I think it was good but I do get where she's coming from. I didn't find it confusing though. But I guess you ...

A vast, black abyss of endless proportion where everything fell, but it did not fall down, up, nor any other direction for even these did yet not exist . You ...

I really loved your story. I'd love to hear more of it when you write more. I only found a few typoes. So if I were you I'd reread it ...

I really do like that. I like how you incorporated the cowboys into the story. I always did like cowboys and any story with them. There was just one typo ...

Wow I loved it. The only thing I have to say about it is this: I search for him as the burns on my skin closing up. closing should be ...

Ok, I just have a few comments. “Hey mum.” Jenny picked up the phone. The person who called Jenny was her mum. You don't have to say that because when ...