Wolf Heart - Read me

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:smt051 I decided to write this because I got so many reviews of people asking me about the character's [in my story] backgrounds and all that stuff. So, I typed up some info on Ayra and her friends/family, the world she inhabits etc.
THIS IS NOT THE PROLOGUE OR A CHAPTER, OR EVEN A PART IN MY BOOK. IT IS HERE FOR PEOPLE TO READ ABOUT MY STORY. >>
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Ayra is one of the Miokoda*, an ancient species of ethereal, immortal beings that are said to have been born at the beginning of time. They have an inhuman strenght and intelligence, as well as a terrible beauty that is both hazardous and alluring to mortals.
Most look to be in their early twenties, no matter how old they are- they can live indefinitely unless slain with weapons or poison. However, that too is difficult; the Miokoda have can sustain great injuries and be up and about the next day due to both incredible healing skills and very fast reflexes.
In physical appearance, they are almost always slim but strong; slender, graceful bodies containing both raw strenght and cheetah-like speed. Their movements are quick and lithe, like that of a dancer's.
They can be either dark or pale skinned, and usually have high, prominent cheekbones.

But they are not invincible; while they possess excellent reflexes and uncanny fighting skills, they cannot stand the blood hemlock* and it is often used by their enemies (which are many) to slay them.


*I am considering all name suggestions- please post yours here!
*A tree unique to Mirithamar (the forest which they live in), it is a tall, gnarled tree with dark crimson bark and black leaves.

-TO BE CONTINUED-
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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Whoa. Super cool. Sounds kind of like Moon Children, huh? You and I think alike. I love the idea of the tree.
"Hey look! A black shooting star!"

"That's no star...that's Fangala!"




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Interesting. :)

Just be sure to avoid making the Miokoda so invincible they're Mary-Sues. I know what you said about the hemlock, but maybe add in other stuff as well?

And I'm not sure that it should be here in this forum.
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this. We have you." -Abed Nadir




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Thanks you guys! I'm going to add and edit soon.
-I agree with you ئ twit ئ; after re-reading it, it seemed like they were a bit Sue-ish. But they do have more weaknesses...I just didn't have time to add them :P
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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I think that character development is one of the greatest challenges that writer's can face. Fiction is always harder to write for two reasons. The first being that it hasn't happened, hence the definition of fiction and the second, fiction has to make sense. Quite often I find myself running into those problems. The challenge is making the story reflect what the actual characters would do were they alive. I hate to be a downer, but I think that all of this information should somehow covered in your story. I'm not trying to put you down or anything, but the great majority of books don't have character bios. This information is very important to the storyline, but it's the writer's duty to incorporate it into the story. I find, the cleverer the exposition, the greater my respect and admiration for the writer is increased. I hate to sound so negative, but that is, after the point of posting in away...
A poet must take the thorns so that others may enjoy the roses that have been made red through no act of nature.




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Thanks!
(For reviewing my other topics too!)
Yeah, I've been thinking about how to incorporate my main character's history. She's young, so it won't take too long, but I don't want to infodump. I'll probably just do it in bits, revealing more of her past as the story progresses.

What do you mean about being so negative? I found your comment helpful :)

Do you think I should post a profile for my character? I really want to, but I'm not sure where I would post that. Here? I dunno...
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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Post it in the Writer's Corner. That's the place for stuff like character profiles and development and what you plan to do next and all. :)
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this. We have you." -Abed Nadir




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Thanks!
Sweet new avatar, by the way! :D
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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hiya!

This sounds really interesting. Your title caught my eye cus I've been writing a piece called "Wild Heart" about wolves (Yes, I am kinda obsessed with them).... kinda similar, Huh? Anyway, this really made me interested in your piece.

Cheers!

~L




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:D Thanks!
Lol, I'm obsessed with wolves too. They're the coolest! 8)
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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Hah. I mostly like drawing and writing/reading about them.....




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Hey this is Summer, you've critiqued some of my writings. Well I loved this description of you story because I didn't read it. Lo Siento!!! but it sounds like it'll be good so when I find time I'll read I promise. Well anyways there's a new comer in town and her name is DesperateRomantic. If you like Fantasy Fiction, which I'm sure you do, you'll really like this story which is untitled. Look for Desperate Romantic. Gracias!!
Ciao!!




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Thanks Summer!
I will definitely read some of DesperateRomantic's stuff :)
Keep writing your story,
.:AYRA:.

P•S•- Do you speak Spanish? That is way cool! 8)
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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I like what you have hear. But it is a bit to perfect. They do need some weaknesses other than being killed by a blade or poison. It would just get to boring if they never died or anything.
So... Yah. One other thing is you say that they are beautiful and always stay young. etc etc. That's a bit cliché. Its a nice idea but everyone does it.
Other than that it nice =]

Keep going,
Genevieve




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Well, they do die. Quite often. :P
And aren't the people in your book un-aging too?

Well, now that I've defended myself; thanks! :)
everything i loved
became everything i lost.


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The heavens laugh with you in your jubilee; my heart is at your festival.
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