Oh, goodness, this nearly made me cry!!! The ending gave me shivers.
19.09.2013
Dear Melody,
What did I do to you? You left me, and I don't know why. We were best friends, and then you just ... disappeared. I wander around the playground every day, looking for you, but you're never there. Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you? Please tell me.
Love,
Your always best friend,
Ellie
29.09.2013
Dear Melody,
You haven't written back yet. Why? I need you, Melody, I know you've seen what she did to me. Rachel. When she hit me, when she kicked me, when she pushed me down the hill. I know you heard what she heard, too; you were standing right next to her! You didn't say anything. Why? Please, just tell me. I'm sorry, Mels, I really am.
Please reply.
Love,
Your forever best friend,
Ellie
03.10.2013
Dear Melody,
Hey. I miss you, you know that, right? But why haven't you written back yet? Is something wrong? Please tell me. Do you believe what Rachel said?
Do you know what Rachel said? She called me a b*tch, she called me a sh*tface, she said everybody hates me. I'm starting to think it's true.
Excuse the wet drops of water, it's just tears.
Love,
Your forever best friend,
Ellie
17.10.2013
Dear Melody,
I'm starting to give up hope. You still haven't written back to me, even though I put them in your tray myself. Why are you ignoring me? Please, please, please reply. Is Rachel saying anything to you? Is she stopping you from writing to me? Please tell me.
Love,
Your forever best friend,
Ellie
30.10.2013
Dear Melody,
It's Halloween tomorrow. I miss the times when we would go trick-or-treating together. I suppose you'll be going with Rachel. I wish we could go together, Mels, I really do. Please write back, again. Can we be friends?
Love,
Your always best friend,
Ellie
02.11.2013
Dear Melody,
Thanks so much for writing back! I miss you, you know. I'd love to come to your house on Bonfire night, and my mum says it's fine, too! I can't wait. We can put on fireworks, and eat roasted marshmallows, and chicken, and do everything we used to. Oh, and sparklers!
Remember last year? We wrote our initials in the sparkler heart thing. That was fun! We should do that again this year, and next year, and every year!
Love,
Your completely and utterly best friend forever,
Ellie :)
09.11.2013
Dear Melody,
What happened? You never showed up to meet me, and when I went over to yours, your mum said you'd gone out. Why? Please write back, I need to know why! I'm sorry for hurting you.
Love,
Your still best friend forever,
Ellie
01.12.2013
Dear Melody,
You told me to die. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I suppose I deserve it, for being so horrible. That's why you never replied before, isn't it? I'm so, so sorry. I doubt I'll ever see you again: I'm going to Hell, after all. And you're definitely going to Heaven. No doubt about that.
All these years we've known each other, there's something I've never told you. I love you. I'm in love with you. I'm sorry. This was messed up. But even in Hell, I'll always love you.
Love,
Ellie
10.01.2014
Dear Ellie,
I found your letters. I can't tell you how sorry I am. I just stood there and watched you die. I didn't write those letters. I found these in Rachel's drawer in her room. She told me you'd said you were going to kill me, that she was hurting you to make you stop. In the end, it was your heart that stopped. Are you still alive? I hope you are. It's your birthday, the tenth of January, today.
You're not in Hell, that's all I know. When you die, you will go to Heaven.
I should have done something, I know that. But I hope that I can make up for it, save others like you, if I couldn't save you yourself. I owe that much. I hope I can join you in heaven. I have missed you. I hope I won't have to much longer. I hope you're still alive.
Love,
Melody
P.S: I love you, too.
15.01.2013
Dear Ellie,
Your mum told me you're dead. I'll miss you. See you on the other side. Above.
Love,
Melody
I love this story because it has kind of what I call "poetry vibe" where you have to put the pieces together. I love the dark ending and how relatable it was. Also, when she admits she's in love with melody that is probably the best moment of the story. I think how the forever best friend and looking around the playground makes it seem more innocent and childish which is what she might have been looking for, since she is trying to get a friend back and pity is one way. I am also making an assumption that she committed suicide verses being chronically ill, based on the story's description.
Hey! I really liked this, from the start you captured my attention which is something any writer strives for! The concept was really cool and it was extremely well-written, you seem to have a good grasp of your characters and you knew exactly what message/what story you wanted to tell.
A few things to look at…
-As I was reading this I couldn’t help but wonder what age group it was for, although it’s in teen it seemed a little young. I’m not sure how old you are but most teenagers wouldn’t block out curse words, especially if they were talking to one of their friends.
-Another thing that made it seem a little young was how Ellie said she wandered around the playground every day. The word playground is really juvenile, maybe try something like “I wander around the school grounds every day, looking for you, but you’re never there.”
-I love how you ended each letter with a different formula to end each letter, although “Your forever best friend” got a bit repetitive, I just didn’t like how you used it twice in a row.
-Also the letter that Ellie wrote to Melody on 02.11.2013 says that Melody wrote her back. I think you should have included the letter from Melody because it’s a little confusing and I also would have liked to know what Melody said 
-I love the dark turn this takes! It makes it that much more realistic!
The ending was absolutely perfect! Ending it with Melody’s letter gave me cold shivers.
I know it seems like I picked on your story a lot but I rarely ever review stories on YWS unless I like them so that should tell you that I only did it because I see potential. I think your idea would be a really cool concept for a novel, maybe something like Perks of Being a Wallflower.
Keep up the amazing work! I’ll definitely be looking for more stories by you
-Nicole
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