z

Young Writers Society


16+ Language Violence

The Things I Do

by smanske15


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language and violence.

I gripped the knife tightly in my hand. It didn't matter that I had done this before, my heart pounded and my blood pumped adrenaline through my veins, sending a jolt of energy through every nerve in my body. For me, there was never anything quite like the thrill of the hunt.

A grunt came from my left and I looked up to meet eyes with Two-Bit as he crouched in a rather uncomfortable position.

I don’t really know how Two-Bit fits in to our tight family of six, and I have never gotten a serious answer when I asked how he came to know us. He was a gruff, immense man from Scotland, and he could fill the doorway with his stout frame. His beard, black like coals sitting in the fire, could make even Santa Claus jealous at its length and thickness. His appearance could intimidate you, as well as his great strength, but everyone who really knew him knew that he was the kindest man you would ever meet.

I offered him an nod, which he returned with a grin. I turned my gaze back to the small house.

The house was set back away from the road, the path leading up to it well overgrown with weeds and nearly impossible to get to unless on foot. My family and I had been keeping an eye on it for a good month--it's location made it the perfect place for summoning dark magic.

Perhaps I should explain a little. First off, my name is Maverick Odin. I was adopted by Gerard Guthrie when I was eight years old, and it was then that I learned my true destiny. There are sources of good in this world, and then there are sources of evil. You may close the book when I say this, or think that maybe you are reading a work of fiction, and I honestly don't care if you do. I only mean to warn those who are willing to listen.

When I was adopted by Gerard, I learned things that most consider to be...well, for lack of a better word, crazy. For centuries the Guthrie family has been in this line of work, and they are the best at what they do.

You see, we hunt witches.

I know what you are thinking: Wow, he’s right, this is crazy. Believe what you will, but the truth is the truth, and I do not lie. But don't get me wrong--we hunt wizards as well, and only the ones who summon dark magic. We make sure that they are guilty of their crimes, and we do not kill them.

And now you're thinking, But wait--then what do you do to them after they are caught? And what about that knife you were talking about earlier? I'll tell you: A witch (or wizard, we don't discriminate) that is found to be guilty of committing crimes such as worshiping the devil or summoning dark magic is to be punished. However, witches and wizards cannot be killed. Literally, they cannot be killed. They can't die.

And no, you sadistic bastards, we do not torture them or anything of that cruel nature. If a witch or wizard is to be stabbed, a kind of illusion would appear before your eyes. You can see the soul of the said witch/wizard leaving its mortal body, much like when you witness a human die, but the witch/wizard does not truly die--its soul merely moves on to the next universe, and it takes many hundreds of years for the soul to find its way back to this world. So they're not sentenced to death, but rather to banishment.

And if you're now wondering why we do what we do, I can only answer that I haven't the slightest idea.

Yep, that would be a question for Gerard, and I can assure you that even he might not know. All I can tell you is that since this whole business started up, it's been a hell of a lot safer for people like you, who are sheltered from the harsh truth.

I was hidden behind the overgrown weeds at the edge of the property, Two-Bit on my left, when I saw the signal. A light flashed on from within the house, which had been abandoned for years. The small flash of light was familiar enough to me that I knew it was caused by a ceremonial candle used by witches and wizards, otherwise called Wicks.

I didn't have to look over my shoulder to see if Two-Bit had seen it as well; I knew he had. I immediately scrambled up and took off running toward the house. I could see three other dark figures sprinting toward the house as well and knew it had to be Gerard, my foster father; August Guthrie, his brother; and Patrick Lawson, my foster sister's betrothed.

The house loomed up before me and I found a small window that had been smashed in some time ago, either from delinquents or animals. I clambered into the house, feeling as though it threatened to cave in on me.

"Hey!" Two-Bit whispered, panting heavily. "Gerard told ye not to go in without back-up!"

I cringed at the idea of waiting for one of them to find another way in, for the doors were long since boarded up, and even Patrick, slender though he was, would not be able to fit his way through the window as I had just done.

"Don't worry, Two-Bit," I said hastily, "I'll only take a look around!" I flashed him a grin for good measure before turning swiftly on my heel.

I vanished into the house, pretending not to hear Two-Bit's desperate yells calling me back. Gerard had been overly protective since he had heard that his cousin, Thomas, had been killed while hunting Wicks just last month. I love Gerard, I truly do, but sometimes he just doesn't understand me at all. Why couldn't he see that I only wanted to help? There could be hostages in the house, for God’s sake!

I weaved my way expertly throughout the old farmhouse, dodging bits of furniture that lay about shrewdly. The house could have been beautiful at some point, but now was only broken and forsaken much like an old woman who spent her days staring out the window of a nursing home, clinging to memories that grew fuzzy as the days went on. I passed through an empty doorway into what used to be the kitchen. The door was torn off of the hinges and lay broken a few feet away. I couldn't help but wonder if it had sat there for some time or if the Wicks had done it.

A crescendo of voices stopped me in my tracks. I held my breath before they quickly faded, but I knew that I was close. Judging from where I had seen the light flash, I guessed their ceremony to be held in the basement--not unusual when performing rituals to raise demons.

Across the room I could see another door. It swayed lightly in the wind. The hinges gave a small moaning complaint, rusted from years of rain and wind hammering at it through the hole in the ceiling. I inched my way slowly toward it, their voices growing louder all the while. I didn't dare breathe until I felt the old, worn wood of the door frame in my right hand, the knife still clenched in my other.

The steady chanting of the Wicks grew until it roared in my ears. "Ossibus meis et caro de carne mea sanguinem..."

It was definitely black magic, that much I knew for certain. I crouched down and lowered my foot onto the top step, gently easing my weight on to it. The weathered boards gave a cry underneath me, and I bit down hard, trying to will the old house to stay silent. Sweat beaded on my upper lip, and I licked it away quickly. I craned my neck to see what was going on in the basement, but I needed to get closer.

They continued with their chanting, the eerie sound striking fear down to my very core. "...ut offerat dona deae in nobis nosmet ipsos..."

I let my foot glide onto the next step, praying that it wouldn't make a sound. The air smelt old and stale, and as I peered down, my weight balance evenly between the two steps, I could just start to see the light of the burning candles. I let my breath out and closed my eyes as I rested the full of my weight onto the second step. It moaned underneath me, and the chanting stopped.

I opened my eyes, expecting to see Wicks before me, staring up the steps at the intruder that was me. But, to my great relief, it was only the end of the incantation. A single, solitary voice spoke out now, the others falling silent. I could see now that they stood in a circle surrounding a pentagon, and my fear hitched to a new level. They weren't your average amateur Wicks--these were experienced witches and wizards with full intentions to let loose a greater demon from the Otherworld.

I now wished that I had listened to Two-Bit and waited for the others, but there was no going back, especially now when I was so close. Gerard and Patrick couldn't be too far behind, and I was right there. Thoughts of a possible hostage pressed deep in my mind, and without another thought I completely committed myself to the task before me.

A shadow moved on the wall and I watched, nearly shaking with nerves, as a man moved into the center of the pentagon, moving his arms in a flourishing fashion.

"My children," he said--a deep, throaty sound resonating throughout the cement basement, "we are nearly complete. The hour is near. Soon, our father will walk among us and we will have the answers we seek."

The man moved to the other side of the pentagon, moving just outside of my line of sight. I leaned forward ever so slightly. The stairs yelled out their objections, and I cringed.

"What was that?" a woman's voice called out. She sounded young and frightened.

"Don't worry, Rose," the deep voice said calmly. "You're frightened--and that is okay. Fear is a gift from the goddess, and you should be grateful that she's favored you."

I let out a long, slow breath. The man continued addressing various members of the group, and I reasoned that there must be about six Wicks. I silently cursed. Six Wicks would be difficult for even Gerard to handle. I hadn't even brought proper weapons! The knife I held in my sweaty palm was my only means of defense against the six Wicks below.

"Now, the hour is upon us, fellow Wicks!" the man's voice boomed, making me jump. "If you would all clasp hands. Dan, if you could, please bring out the sacrifice?"

It was as if everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. At those words, I was given a boost of courage and quickly dropped down one more step. They gave a groan and the whole set of stairs shifted ever so slightly. I was lucky that the Wicks had chosen that moment to begin cheering at the prospect of raising their demon and therefore hadn't heard me. I had to know for certain, though--I had to know that their sacrifice wasn't human.

I peered down at the circle, struggling to see past the bodies. I didn't need to, though, for my suspicions were soon confirmed.

The girl was shoved forward into the center of the pentagon, her gag pulled off in the process. She let out a scream, which turned quickly into a sob. I could make her out clearly, now. She had long red hair that was plastered to her face from the sweat and filth. She had to have been in her early twenties--not much older than me. She had a slim figure and wore jeans and a tee shirt--both torn, nearly ripped to shreds in places. The poor girl was probably grabbed when she was walking home from somewhere.

"Please!" she screamed. "Please, let me go!"

I had to restrain myself to keep from running down and comforting her. Gerard had trained me to behave like this--to hold back that primal instinct to protect that made us all human. It was necessary for the survival of myself, and, if all went as planned, the hostage, too. I rubbed a sweaty palm through my hair, racking my brain, trying to think of a plan to get her out and keep us both alive.

"Ferrum ferro hoc tibi offero sacrificium humanae!"

The man reached into a black bag as he spoke, his voice rising and falling in a lulling tone. He took out a long, sharp blade.

I gulped and realized that I couldn't wait any longer.

Without any kind of forethought, I leapt down from the stairs, landing lightly on my feet and tucking into a roll so my body could absorb the impact. I wrapped my arm around the first Wick I saw and my knife was instantly at her throat.

The Wick, a young witch with stringy brown hair, kicked out and struggled against me, but my grip was locked tight and she could do little to resist.

"Let the girl go, Wick," I said darkly, glaring at each of them. I could now see that I was right--there were six Wicks; four wizards, two witches. An elder wizard stepped forward with the blade, and as soon as he spoke I knew him to be their praesul, or leader.

"Set the knife down, son," he said, his arms waving like I was an angry, wounded animal. "You have no idea what's going on here."

I smirked. "Oh, trust me--I know all too well, Praesul."

His eyes widened when I addressed him with his title. He quickly looked up the stairs to see if I was alone. When he saw that no one came running down, guns blazing, he smiled. His teeth gleamed, and in the candlelight his skin looked scaled and rough like a crocodile’s.

"Wick hunter," he said. The other Wick shivered and few took involuntary steps back while others sneered with distaste. "Where are the rest of you?"

I remained silent, my heart pounding in my throat.

The praesul grinned even wider. "No? Foolish hunter--you came alone!"

A larger wizard burst forward, the inaccurate fact lending him courage. I had little time to think--I plunged the knife into the witch's throat.

The Wick screamed, but the wizard was soon upon me; my sudden attack upon his kin not enough to stop him. I dropped the witch and flashed my knife up, but he was quicker than I assumed. The knife tore a deep gash along his forearm, but it didn't hit anything vital and he continued toward me. He slammed into me and the knife went flying.

I landed hard on the floor, the wizard on top of me. He tossed back his arm and a hot flash of pain ripped across my face as his knuckles scraped against my skin. He pulled back and struck me once more as I was still recovering from the shock of the first hit. As the wizard pulled back for his third strike, I made my move and rolled out from underneath him.

I was on my feet before he even realized that I had moved, and I brought my knee up quick and gave him a sharp kick in his side. He fell, and I narrowly escaped another punch from a different Wick. The Wick was the second witch--the resemblance between her and the one now lying lifeless on the ground was striking. I had barely enough time to shield my face before the witch stuck again, and a sharp pain split throughout my side as another Wick attacked me from behind.

I fell to the ground, landing hard on one knee, before another hit landed on the tender part of my shoulder, sending my sprawling to the ground. I curled myself into a ball, hoping to spare myself some pain, but it was unnecessary: The praesul spoke out, ordering his Wicks.

"Children! Children, stop this madness!" he cried. The Wicks slowly, reluctantly withdrew and I lowered an arm to watch. "What do you think our father would say?" He glared at all of them disapprovingly, and honestly I was a little thrown off. The Wicks avoided his eyes, not daring to question their Praesul.

"Lewis, could you tell me what he would say?" the wizard asked.

A wizard standing only a few feet away slowly shook his head. The praesul's mouth quivered with anger and he erupted, "I will tell you what our father would say! Our father would say that we are stupid for not taking his most gracious offering! Can't you see, Wicks, that this was a message from Astaroth?"

The Wicks slowly raised their eyes to him, and my heart fell. I knew what he was going to say before he said it, and I still couldn't believe it.

"Wicks," he said, eyes ablaze, "Rose clearly wasn't strong enough. Our father, Astaroth sent this hunter to cleanse our clan with a proper sacrifice! Isn't it clear to you now?"

I shook with fear as the Wicks all slowly nodded, gazing down at me with a new kind of wonder and treachery in their eyes. I lowered my gaze, still wondering where the hell Two-Bit and Gerard were, when I saw a glint of silver.

In the struggle, I had nearly forgotten all about her--the girl, the redhead who was taken as hostage for their human sacrifice, locked eyes with me from across the room. What had caught my attention was the knife--my knife--that she held in her hands.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
47 Reviews


Points: 1131
Reviews: 47

Donate
Mon Jul 28, 2014 12:35 am
View Likes
RoxieRain wrote a review...



Oh my gosh I love this! :-) But to backtrack first I saw that you had done a review on one of my pieces and I like to return the favor by reviewing one of your pieces also. But it might be more because this was really good, haha. Now, I usually only like to read romance books but this was really well written and I have definitely never read/heard anything like it. It made me smile, cringe and had me waiting on the edge for more. Your descriptions are so well written. My favorite is when you are describing the house and using an old women sitting in a nursing home as a reference or image that you are comparing it to. I also like how you explained things. It wasn't random or awkward, and the flow was still there. I can't wait to read the other parts and any more to come.
Keep up the amazing writing! :-)
-Roxie




smanske15 says...


Thank you so much!! Geez, I'm just about tearing up. This website is so full of love for my story!
Thank you!



RoxieRain says...


Aww, you are so welcome because it is definitely well deserved. :-)



User avatar


Points: 776
Reviews: 4

Donate
Sun Jul 27, 2014 6:49 am
View Likes
eorchard wrote a review...



Okay, so you had me right from the title. "The Things I Do". Brilliant, oh my gosh.
I'm afraid this is a bit of a hasty review, it's about two in the morning and I've got a million things to do, but I just had to tell you how fantastic this work is. I can't wait to read more. Your character, Maverick, is already easy to like and imagine. I love the idea of how he's not actually killing or toturing and that even the idea of it really upsets him ("you sadistic bastards" oh my gosh, I cried I was laughing so hard). I'm really pleased with the way you turned something so dark and gruesome into something that not only had to be faced by your character, but could be faced. Without even saying the word, you told me that your character was brave, albeit a little reckless, but it just made him incredibly loveable. You packed a lot of action and story into this first chapter and I'm excited to tune into tommorrow to catch up with the rest that you've written. Congratulations on the story and keep up the good work! You have a very entertaining and exciting idea on your hands. Although I've seen work like this before (good guys hunting down supernatural beings and keeping the world safe despite the opinions of the people), your story has an original, unique spin on it and I can't wait to continue.
Cheers!
E.




smanske15 says...


Thank you so much!! Please keep reading-I think one of the best things about being a writer is when I hear from my readers and get to know their opinions. I'll keep writing, if you keep reviewing!!
Thanks!!
Smanske15



User avatar
81 Reviews


Points: 9485
Reviews: 81

Donate
Wed Jul 23, 2014 9:55 pm
View Likes
Masquerade wrote a review...



Hi smanske15. I thought this chapter was very interesting. Particularly the second half when you started getting into the action. The writing of this chapter seemed fine, apart from several typos and a few awkward sentences (you might want to try reading it aloud to catch some of those). I think the concept you're writing about is interesting. It seems like a modern twist on an old idea which I like.

The beginning of this chapter had too much exposition I think, though. You spent a lot of time explaining the character's origins in the group and explaining about the witch hunting before your character actually jumped into the action. For a first chapter, I think you should leave some of that out. The action was really compelling and would make a better hook for a person reading this for the first time, and some of the explanations felt unnecessary anyways. I feel like it would have become very apparent very quickly that the main character is hunting witches and wizards (or Wicks) just from what was happening, and the explanations of what happens when you "kill" a Wick could come in later. I usually feel like it's best to slip that kind of exposition in somewhere where it fits more naturally instead of jumping out and directly explaining it to the reader.

I found most of this to be pretty original, but I did find some cliches you might want to consider rewording or changing. When you were explaining Maverick's past you wrote "that I learned my true destiny". Destiny and fate is certainly something interesting to write about, but the way you phrased it without any further explanation just came off as being very cliche. I would consider removing this, and perhaps being able to explain the destiny element somewhere later.

Apart from those things I enjoyed reading this chapter. I'd be interest to see how the rest of the story unfolds. I think you've got a fun concept and I could see this becoming a really interesting story.

Good work and happy writing,
-Masq




smanske15 says...


Thanks so much for the review!! I really appreciate it!!
I am an amateur writer at best, so I can't really promise that there won't be any grammar errors and especially awkward sentences, but I will try my best.
I know that I always explain my stories way too much at the beginning. I think I just want everyone to know instantly what I'm talking about, and I forget that I can still explain things throughout the rest of the book. I will try to be better about that...
Thank you for commenting on the plotline, too! I'm glad you thought it was original. It truly was an original idea, but I just love that you thought so, too. I'm really glad that you enjoyed it, and I hope that it really pulled you in. I will let you know when I post Section 2 of Maverick's story. Please do me a really big favor and review the second part as well?
Thanks again. I really do appreciate your comments, and will focus on them when I write the rest of the book.
Smanske15



User avatar
18 Reviews


Points: 1711
Reviews: 18

Donate
Wed Jul 23, 2014 9:44 pm
View Likes
Vari wrote a review...



Hi Smanske,

Overall I really liked your story and your writing style. You're not afraid of breaking the third wall and engaging your readers. Your writing style makes it very easy to visualize the scene in my head but sometimes this works against you. I kind of the read through your chapter and dotted down anything that I noticed or questioned in particular. I hope this helps C:

- I snorted at the Santa reference.
- He says "I do not lie", from that I take it that he never lies? In the witch hunting business I'd presume he lies all the time about what he does.
- For some reasons wizard makes me think Harry Potter and warlock makes me think dark magic...
- "You can see the soul of the said witch/wizard leaving its mortal body, much like when you witness a human die, but the witch/wizard does not truly die" - used 'die' twice in the same sentence, this is frowned upon (mostly by me xD )
- I like the going back and introducing yourself part and what you do part but then you crash back into reality. Maybe you should say something along the lines of "getting back to the current situation" or something?
- At some point Two-Bits yells at Odin, my first thought was: shouldn't they be quiet? What if the witches/warlock hear them?
- Does a door sway?
- You reference a father and then directly after a goddess. I hope we'll see more background information about the witches' beliefs in a later chapter.
- Why didn't he bring proper weapons? And what are improper weapons? Did he bring a spoon to a knife fight? And if he did, why? While knowing someone in the family died on the hunt last month.
- "Dan, if you could, please bring out the sacrifice?" Haha, ass if he's asking for the Thanksgiving turkey to be brought out xD
- The victim's timing of her scream seems a little off to me. They put her in the middle of the circle and remove the gag. If it were me I'd be screaming with or without the gag.
- He just killed the young witch, right? The one that seemed scared/reluctant? Isn't that a bit harsh?
- The wizard was on top of Odin? Does this mean looming above or sitting astride? If the latter, how does one not notice the person you're sitting on has rolled away?
- Asking someone like "could you tell me what he would say?" seems a bit comical to me. It reminds me of a disapproving teacher, reprimanding one of his unruly students.
- I like the cliffhanger. Where'd she get the knife and what is she going to do with it? Friend or foe?




smanske15 says...


Thanks so much! I can see what you mean on a lot of these, but please believe that I left some of it here intentionally (for instance, how it appeared harsh to you that he should "kill" the witch, and how you drew the connection between the Wick's question and the disapproving teacher.) You brought up important points, too, and thank you for that! The whole purpose of posting was so that I could see what fit and what didn't, and of course what other people would think of my story.
Thanks again for also including suggestions for how I could fix things, and I'm really glad that you enjoyed it, especially the cliff hanger (that was the thought I was going for)! If you want, I will let you know when I post Section 2 of The Things I Do (wow, that was really Dr.Seuss-y), and please keep reviewing!!
Thanks so much, again,
Smanske15



User avatar
32 Reviews


Points: 487
Reviews: 32

Donate
Wed Jul 23, 2014 8:59 pm
smanske15 says...



This might sound familiar to a few of you--I've made revisions since the rough draft. This is the first section to the beginning of Maverick Odin's journey. Thanks for reading and please leave a review so I can see what you thought and if it needs anything else!!
Thanks,
Smanske15





“Can a magician kill a man by magic?” Lord Wellington asked Strange. Strange frowned. He seemed to dislike the question. “I suppose a magician might,” he admitted, “but a gentleman never could.”
— Susanna Clarke, Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell