Young Writers Society

Hi there, LGF here for a review;

This made me think, this poem. It was interesting, the whole concept of isolation. It felt free, and raw, like you didn't need any editing to get your thoughts on paper, and I loved it. Some beautiful imagery;

And not even the strongest of men

Could ever break its steel grip.


Chased by the howling fury

Of the thoughts that echo 'round my head.

It had to read it through a couple of times to really get the full extent of it, but I really liked it. It was different from a lot of the teen-angst poems you see on here, all so edited and perfected, this was a lot rawer and free. Your style of writing really is beautiful.

My favorite lines;

As the sun journeys gracefully higher

With the ease of a dancer,

So smooth and soft,

Overall a really beautiful poem, interesting and raw.

Keep up the good work;

LGF

'I am alone, chased by the howling fury of the thoughts that echo 'round my head'. Well you're not alone then, there's your thoughts. Very dramatic poem, isolation is a only state of mind in this piece. The Isolation is only in your head here. Dramatic, but nice.

It's beautiful. I love it! Isolation is something everyone goes through and it's amazing that you were able to put it down in words. I can relate to the poem. Makes me believe that I am not so alone after all! Great job!

I'm guessing that this is freeform, right?

This may be a stylist technique I don't know, but you had
"I am a prisoner of silence-
The cold wind
Has sealed my fate,"
A period would have worked instead of the dash since they don't seem directly related. Unless you mean that the cold wind condemned you to your prison, you may want to change that.

It's a good poem, I prefer more structure, but I can see the merits.