Young Writers Society

Hi, Sunshine!

This is Eros here!

I am sorry for you lost your friend. Hats off to your beautiful work. It was a touching poem. It was an emotional poem. I somehow controlled my tears.

I liked the idea of calling your friend as a sweet angel. It is an age old beleif that after death a person becomes a fairy or an angel. Your imagination is superb! I liked it.

"Dear angel, I told you looked fine without hair." This line suggests that she used to feel sad of the loss of hair due to treatment but you did not allow her sadness to come.
It is a poem which tells us how much you miss her. May her spirit get peace.

My heart got filled with emotions. I can uderstand how you might be feeling on her loss.

First off, I commend you for writing of your friend. And I'm sorry of your loosed. So lets get started. I liked how you started with Dear angel, as if your sending a letter to your friend in heaven it brings everything together and makes everything that much breath-taking. I also liked how you described the things that you have missed about your friend such as her smile, laugh, and her eyes. I felt that really aided you in having the reader feel the love you had for her. I also really liked your ending where you wrote " Happy 16th birthday sweet angel Emily.

*rest in peace baby girl* " That hit home and made this the best poem I have ever read for sure. The way this is relatable for greif and lost. You have made this poem flawlessly. So well done and I hope you the best.
~Fallen

You made me cry. I also had a friend who died of cancer. I know how you must feel. I'm sorry for your loss. Just hope she's in a better place now.

This poem was very sentimental and I could empathize with it. It was beautiful and heart-wrenching at the same time. I could see the emotion that you literally POURED into your words. So much emotion was in it, it was hard not to start sobbing.

I applaud you in your writing.

Kudos to you! You have earned my stamp of approval.

GREAT WORK!

~Joslyn

I don't usually review poems, (reason being, I'm not too good at writing them. )
but I'll make an exception for this one.
I thought that this was a really beautiful, sentimental poem. The whole thing resounds with feelings of loss and with remembrance.

I really hate to be nit-picky about something like this.
" Dear angel, I told you looked fine without hair."
I think there is supposed to be something in between the "you" and the "looked".
This isn't a mistake or a problem, I just wanted to point out that you don't have to capitalize every line. (Obviously unless it's is meant to be that way for a specific reason.)
Sometimes, I write poems with nothing capitalized except "I" and names and such.
Just a suggestion. But your poem as absolutely fine the way it is capitalized.

I just want to say how touching the poem is. You did a great job of expressing your feelings.
Keep up the good work!

Hey there! My name's Ella, and I'm going to review your beautiful poem.

Let's get down to business. I read and reread your whole poem numerous times, and there were no mistakes. What really annoys me, though, is that every line starts with a capital letter. If you choose to use punctuation in a poem, it's not grammatically correct to use capital letters in the middle of a sentence after a comma. It is only to be done after periods. So, your next step would be to fix the problem.

Seeya!