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Jack's Critique Emporium [BACK IN BUSINESS]

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Thu Jan 08, 2009 6:21 pm

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Lost_in_dreamland says...

Okay; I'm unsure as to whether to carry on with this piece, it just randomly came to me the other night. It's in Other fiction:
topic41312.html
it's very short, only around 400 words. xD

for what are we without words and stories?

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Sun Jan 11, 2009 1:29 am

luverly says...

post482240.html#482240

It's in Fantasy Fiction and I don't have a title yet, which is why it's called 'Indunian Story'.

It's a prolouge to a larger story I'm still working on. It's pretty short and I just posted an edited version.

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Mon Jan 12, 2009 10:08 pm

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Lord Anzius says...

I'll just bother you with my totally useless story

About a guy in England (close to London) who has just moved into a mansion (Oh and it's a few years after the second world war) There he meets a gnome called Mike, in this chapter he decides to go and buy groceries.

Name: The mansion chapter 3 (Dust an' Products)
genre:other fiction

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic35811.html

To copy reality is good... But to create reality is much, much better.
-Giuseppe Verdi-

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Mon Jan 12, 2009 10:10 pm

Firestarter says...

Apologies if any recently requested critiques are slow on the ground, I have a very busy two weeks.

How young are you?
How old am I?
Let's count the rings
around my eyes.
--The Replacements

idraax: Europe is weird then. Math should be standardized internationally.

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Thu Feb 19, 2009 9:11 am

Jiggity says...

Still alive and active?

Mah name is jiggleh. And I like to jiggle.

"Indecision and terror, thy name is novel." - Chiko

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Sun Feb 22, 2009 1:23 am

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Threnody says...

You seem busy. But could you please, pretty please review my very short prologue?

post511481.html#511481

It's called the Piper Legend

Thanks so so much.

Peace, Love and Sugar Packets~
Forever Threnody

“One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes”
~ The Little Prince~

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Wed Mar 04, 2009 10:45 am

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threm. says...

topic44643.html

I'm kind of afraid on showing you this. hahaha!

-threm. It's fantasy, i hope it's okay. thanks yo.

"Don't judge me based on my works, so I won't judge you based on yours"

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Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:14 pm

Firestarter says...

I'll catch up on the above 4 and then I'll be open again! Sorry. I have been lax.

How young are you?
How old am I?
Let's count the rings
around my eyes.
--The Replacements

idraax: Europe is weird then. Math should be standardized internationally.

Gender:

Mon Apr 27, 2009 5:43 am

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asxz says...

Hi! Could you please review?

[url=http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/post549255.html#549255]
The tree of terror. [/url]It's part of a story I'm writing, but I have a brief overview at the begining of the piece. it's in action/advent Fiction, and it's about 3 1/2 pages in MS word... sorry! You can take a few days though... I don't really mind!

::XoX::KeepWriting::XoX::

GENERATION 29: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.

Writing is 3% talent and 97% not being distracted by the internet

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Tue Apr 28, 2009 6:32 pm

peanutgallery007 says...

1. http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic46037.html

2. Peanutgallery's NaPoWriMo thread

3. Just my collection of poetry for the month... some of them are really good, I think, and some are pretty pathetic, but I would like a critique!

No rush.

Have a peanut =)

Try your hand at my poetry contest!

Proud LGBT supporter.

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Sun Jan 10, 2010 6:56 pm

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Firestarter says...

And we're back in business!

After Tuesday, I should have time to spend on reviewing. Same general rules apply as on the first page. Hit me up, kiddos!

How young are you?
How old am I?
Let's count the rings
around my eyes.
--The Replacements

idraax: Europe is weird then. Math should be standardized internationally.

Gender:

Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:27 am

pudin.junidf says...

Hey Jack!

Can you review this for me please?
IS called A demon sits behind me at school

Les sanglots longs
Des violons
De l'autonne
Blessent mon coeur
D'une langueur
Monotone.
Verlaine

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Tue Jan 12, 2010 2:31 pm

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Firestarter says...

Done!

How young are you?
How old am I?
Let's count the rings
around my eyes.
--The Replacements

idraax: Europe is weird then. Math should be standardized internationally.

Gender:

Wed Jan 13, 2010 11:35 am

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cosby says...

Please could review the second chapter of my story please? (You may want to read the Prologue and Chapter One first!)

Dark Tide - Chapter Two

Thank you!

- From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it -

- If the doctor told me I had 6 minutes left to live, I'd type faster -

I laugh at my own signature. Sad? Yes.

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Sun Jan 17, 2010 8:46 pm

Firestarter says...

Hey cosby, sorry for the slow response. I should get it done over the next day or two; if not, send me a reminder PM.

How young are you?
How old am I?
Let's count the rings
around my eyes.
--The Replacements

idraax: Europe is weird then. Math should be standardized internationally.

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