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Sorta Fleshed Out Novel Idea--HELP!!!!



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Sat Jan 26, 2013 5:50 pm
PurpleMoment says...



This is my idea. WAYYYY more fleshed out than my last idea. Rough. Very rough. Details definitely not worked out. Even the names I chose may not be the names I stick with. I don't even have a location for anything. Lol It's almost pathetic. But this is a rough, rough idea. It's a start. So just keep in mind, this is only an idea and a terribly rough version of a possible plot. Don't make fun of me :) Lol but critique my idea. Give me positives and negatives. Suggestions, concerns, questions...anything. Sorry if it's a jumble of unorganized thought.

Allie was born to two parents, John and Linda, and she had a twin brother, Jason. Her parents were criminals and drug addicts. They were often frustrated with Allie for crying all the time and not communicating. Finally, they realize that she is deaf. They don't have any money and they don't want to put up with Allie anymore. So they "go on vacation" in ___________ and they plan to kill Allie. Allie's brother is there, too. They tell him to wait in the tent.

The dad takes a shovel and hits Allie in the head. She falls down. And just as they are about to whack her again, her brother comes out of the tent and sees what they are doing and tried to stop them. Well, obviously, they have to kill him because he saw that, right? Exactly. So they do. And they think Allie is dead, but she isn't. She is conscious, but on the brink of life and death. The parents take Allie's twin brother and they go dig a hole and bury him. They are digging a hole deep in the forest for Allie, when Allie gains a little consciousness but can barely move. She crawls towards the road. And a man and his wife are pulled over trying to read a map. They see her and go to help her. They rush her to the hospital. She is in and out of consciousness. And has a bit of amnesia. They don't know her name, but the initials in her sweatshirt are A. K. L. After an investigation and whatnot into the area where she was found, they find nothing. The man and woman who found her, James and Charlene, take foster parent classes, and learn sign language and help Allie to develop some communication and speaking skills. They eventually adopt her.

She grew up happy, went to the School for the Deaf during the day like any other normal child, and came home at night. Her best friend was her neighbor next door, Ethan. So she was happy and whatnot. She doesn't remember anything about her birth parents attacking her. She knows she was adopted and always assumed from birth. Her parents never bothered to correct her and tell her that it was when she was 4 years old. They never saw the point of telling her. She was happy, healthy, and everything was perfect. In high school, she develops a huge crush on Ethan, but never mentions anything. Her friend Olivia falls for Ethan, which is hard for Allie, but Allie loves Olivia and respects her relationship with Ethan, so she just never says anything. Ethan and Olivia eventually get engaged, much to Allie's sadness.

My novel will incorporate the information I just mentioned, of course. But my novel starts when she's in her 20's. Her parents moved from the town she grew up in, so she's living in her childhood house with Olivia until Olivia's wedding with Ethan. One day, her mom sends her a box of Allie's old things, thinking Allie would love it. And Allie does like it. One of the things in the box is doll that was found in Allie's backpack when her parents first saved Allie's life. Allie thinks nothing of it when she looks at the item, but soon she starts having nightmares about thinks. And she feels unsafe. Memories are coming back but she can't fully get a hold of them. This is when her parents tell her about when they found her. But they know nothing about her birth family. She remembers someone named "Jason" but can't remember who it is. It's deeply hurting her, so she begins writing to TV stations or whatever to tell her story.

It's an interesting story, as the TV stations across the nation broadcasted about a little girl being found (when she was 4 years old) and now that the then little girl, now adult, remembers some things, they air more broadcasts. Allie doesn't really expect anyone to come forward with valid information, but it's worth a shot.

Allie's birth parents, John and Linda see it on the news. And is afraid that Allie might start remembering. They decide they have to shut her up once and for all. So, they find where she is living and sabotage her car.

A few weeks later, she and Olivia are going somewhere in Allie's new car. Allie lets Olivia drive and they have a severe accident--well, not an "accident."

Olivia dies on impact. Allie is alright--but she has a near death experience (for the 2nd time in her life) Anyways, of course Allie is grieving. And Ethan is grieving. When Allie comes out of the hospital, she realizes that she can see and communicate with the dead. This sets her off. She is terrified and doesn't understand what is happening. People already look at her a little weird because she is deaf, but not she sees ghosts? She is livid. But she realizes that her communication with the dead is interesting. Instead of having difficulties communicating with Hearing people because they don't sign...the ghosts she communicate with send thoughts and images to her mind, without having to speak. She waits a long time before she tells anyone, even Ethan.

One day, a ghost tells her that he is stuck because his parents won't stop grieving for him and blame themselves for his death five years ago. She is reluctant. She doesn't want to help him. This totally freaks her out, but she visits with the family or something and the spirit gets peace. She finally tells Ethan about her new-found "gift" and he doesn't believe her at first. But eventually he does. John and Linda are following Allie because she was supposed to die in the car accident, not Olivia. And somehow they discover that Allie can now talk to the dead. They decide that they could use her to their advantage. Use Allie to make money or something. So instead of wanting to kill her, they want to get on her good side and con her into helping them.

Meanwhile, another ghost comes to Allie. He is a little boy, all bloody. He is confused. He doesn't know where he is. Allie works with him. It takes a long time and a lot of research (Ethan help of course, and him and Allie's relationship grows stronger--she never stopped having feelings for him). During all this time, John and Linda learned a few signs and come up with a story and whatever to try to lure Allie in. After all, they are con-men (and woman).

Eventually, Allie learns the little ghost boy's name and where he grew up. And she does digging and research and find out that he went missing or was not reported missing or whatever. And that he had a twin sister who also disappeared around the same time. Parents disappeared too. Blah blah. And realizes that SHE is HIS sister. He was killed. He was her twin. And then John and Linda somehow figure out what she is learning and plan to kill her before she tells anyone. They come after her. And she is cornered. Ethan is a hero and eventually saves her. And blah blah blah.

And Ethan says that he loves her and she isn't sure what to do. She is so conflicted. Olivia died a few months ago and he misses her but he fell for Allie.

She spends some time thinking about all this, when Olivia (ghost) appears and says that her spirit stayed stuck because she couldn't leave until Allie knew that she wants her and Ethan to be together. She says that she is dead, and if Ethan wants to be with Allie, vice versa, she would be so happy knowing that her best friend could love him and be good to him the way she never will be able to now that she is dead. So yay. Cue happy ending.
Last edited by PurpleMoment on Sat Jan 26, 2013 6:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.
  





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Sat Jan 26, 2013 6:38 pm
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FruityBickel says...



This is a pretty interesting idea. Could use a few more details and what not, but the outline of it is solid. I'd say give it a shot.
  





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Sat Jan 26, 2013 7:05 pm
beckiw says...



Hey Purple :)

So I've read this through and it seems quite well though out, however maybe a little too over-convoluted. I think you have enough conflict and drama with all of Allie's background and her actual parents trying to kill her as she starts to remember who she is and what happened to her.

I just think it sort of feels like you took two novels and shoved them together. One about a girl who has these memories locked away and tries to discover the truth, which in turn puts her in danger and then this over novel where a girl's friend is killed in a car accident and the girl alive starts to see ghosts.

I just feel like there is a little too much going on and too many twists and turns.

But...on the other hand...the best advice is just to write it and see what happens :)
'The creation of a single world comes from a huge number of fragments and chaos.' - Hayao Miyazaki
  





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Sat Jan 26, 2013 8:31 pm
Starleene says...



Hey Purple,
I like the general concept you have here but you should look into simplifying it. If you have too many twists your reader is going to get lost and confused. You want the reader to be able to connect the events in the story rather easily. Think about having a well thought out story rather than a story with a lot of events.
Other than that I think you have a pretty good idea. If you come up with some other ideas let me know!
Starleene <3
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Sun Jan 27, 2013 4:07 am
Meoiu says...



I like the overall idea of the story that you have, but as I was reading, I felt like there was going to be way too much going on though. However, I really like the fact that she can see and communicate with the dead, and eventually uncover the "truth" as to what happened to her.
  





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Sun Jan 27, 2013 10:49 am
blakey789 says...



I also like the overall idea..it's kind of intriguing.
Before I tell you the problems, let me tell you one thing, which I believe, never share an idea for your story, it's not an intelligent thing to do, you know.
Now, it looks like a series of event produced out of an idea which you had, which is good. I liked that ghost part which help her uncover her forgotten past.
If you do your rough idea cleverly, it could make a good read, though the deaf part bugged me.
Regards,
Blakey789
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