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My newest storyline



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Wed Oct 15, 2008 4:37 pm
heartbeatboy says...



Of course, I cut out the pop culture refernces and the giant dragon, but here's my idea, I based off a dream I had:

A fourteen-year-old boy named Devin finds himself in the midst of a devastating earthquake and is seperated from his family. He is brought to a tow, about 24 miles away, and when he awakes finds himself at an old diner. He must figure out where his family is, find them, and survive through it all.

With the help of a wise old man, the police (who actually helped very little), and some faith he finds a place to call home. The end.

Whaddya think?
  





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Wed Oct 15, 2008 6:29 pm
silverSUNLIGHTx says...



sounds interesting. definitely something i'd read.
--->Don't forget we've got unfinished business. Stories yet to unfold, tales that must be retold.
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Wed Oct 15, 2008 6:42 pm
Blink says...



Wait, so he's with his family and then BAM, he's 24 miles away? Firstly, if he's 24 miles away, can't he just walk back? Then, how on earth did an earthquake bring him 24 miles away?

With the help of a wise old man,

Gandalf? Seriously, it's very clichéd.

I like the idea natural chance separating them, but think it out a little more.

Best of luck!
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Sat Oct 18, 2008 12:15 am
TheWordsmith says...



Right now it's a very basic plot. Then again, most of my plots started out that way. But so far, it seems interesing.

Suggestion? Make the wise old man a wise six-year-old, a psycic dog, or something different like that. Same story, different twist.
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Fri Oct 24, 2008 9:49 am
danster724 says...



Intruiging (<-spelled wrong) though I must agree there are some serious holes, and yeah the wise old guy is cliche'. Maybe the earthquake caused a rift in the space time continuum which actually put him in an alternate realityand the only way to get back is to creat similair circumstances. So yo have this character making deals with the russian mod to blow off five thousand pounds of plastic explosives in the town to right the course of humanity and take him home. You can also replace the old man with a hot femae sidekick.

Because reality is only how you percieve it.
  





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Fri Oct 24, 2008 7:13 pm
thunder_dude7 says...



Most people have said what I have to say. Don't worry about the plot being basic for now. I actually started Betrayed and Plagued by basing it on Harry Potter, because, at the time, I thought it would make me famous. When the idea became cliche, lots of stuff was shuffled around.

Just try and add new details and stuff. It's simple, but you can make it better.
  








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