z

Young Writers Society


The Confessional



Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sun Mar 25, 2012 1:58 pm
View Likes
The Confessional says...



This has been the best five days of my life. Ever since you sent that message to me, I've been walking on air. I wish we weren't who we are, and didn't have the parents that we do. Because, love, I know I love you. I've never been more sure in all my life. If you didn't live states away, things might be different. But all my parents would see is the age gap. To us, two years doesn't make a bit of difference. Not even two years, actually. But to them, it does. And we both know it.

Oh Darling, I can't wait until I can see you one day. You know what Ashley says. I love you. And I hope you read this, because you'll know it's about you if you do.
I LOVE YOU.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sun Mar 25, 2012 3:28 pm
The Confessional says...



I think about you every day. It's been over two years that I haven't.

You're one of my last thoughts as I go to sleep and one of my first thoughts when I wake up. I hope he's doing well. I wonder if he thinks of me too. I wish things weren't the way they are.

I pray for you every night. Happiness. Kindness. That you see that it doesn't have to be this way..

Even though I shouldn't, a part of me still misses you. and wants you.

The miles between us will only increase but I'm holding out hope for someday.


Spoiler! :
Oh....
and the novel is about you.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sun Mar 25, 2012 3:51 pm
The Confessional says...



I'm not normal. People tell me that I've come back, come back from that far gone place that still leaves an uncertain twinkle in their eyes when they look at me, but I haven't. Part of me is still back there, and probably always will be. Sometimes I can switch over to it, watch it sit in a corner in fetal position, or lay in the road screaming.
I hate that no one understands. I hate that I can't talk to my family, and my friends think they get it so that rules them out too. I hate those doctors who said "there's nothing wrong with you", and then when I repeated their words they told me "yes there is". I hate being gay. I hate being crazy.
I'm angry, and nobody knows it.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Mon Mar 26, 2012 7:39 pm
View Likes
The Confessional says...



I love you. Sometimes I don't think I should say love because I think it's just a crush. But then, if this isn't love, what is it? Because these feelings are too strong to be a crush.

I think of you every day. You're the first thing I think of when I wake up, and the last one when I sleep. My heart feels like it's in a fist and it's being crushed when you talk to me, or message me. It skips a beat when I see a heart in the messages. I feel hurt when you don't talk to me. I know I should talk to you, but sometimes I think you know me well enough to know that I expect you to ask what has happened to me when I suddenly stop talking and stay quiet for a very long time. I love seeing even the smallest messages that you send to me. I love that I'm someone you can trust enough to talk to about your problems. I love thinking that you care about me so much that you don't want to ruin my fun at times. I love that you're so funny and amazing and sweet. I love you for cheering me up when I'm sad. I love you for everything that you do. I love you so much I can't bear it when I think you might hate me or be mad at me then I start crying.

But I hate that you live so far away. That I can't meet you. That I can't talk to you face to face. That every time I try to leave, you know exactly what to tell me so that I come back. That you seem to care a lot more about other girls than you do about me. That you don't realize I love you. That you might have realized that I do but don't say anything to me. Now I'm fine with it if you reject me, because I know you'll never love me the way I love you. For you, we'll always be very close friends and nothing more. And I can't tell you any of this because I don't want our friendship to crumble. I don't want us to be awkward around each other and not be able to talk to each other.

But I needed to get this out. It hurts me too much. I hate that it hurts me so much. But I love you. I hope you see this and finally realize that I love you. And I don't think I'll be able to stop loving you for a long time.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Thu Mar 29, 2012 3:32 am
The Confessional says...



I thought you were my friend? But you keep choosing him over me every time. You use me to talk about him even though it hurts every time you do. I'm being used. But why?
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Fri Mar 30, 2012 1:34 am
The Confessional says...



I still think about the way your hand felt in mine.
And maybe, just maybe, one day I can feel it rather than think it.
I know I ended it, but I'd do it over again every time if I could.
Because I never stopped loving you.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





User avatar
362 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 36
Reviews: 362
Sun Apr 01, 2012 2:51 am
Fishr says...



The Confessional wrote:I'm not normal. People tell me that I've come back, come back from that far gone place that still leaves an uncertain twinkle in their eyes when they look at me, but I haven't. Part of me is still back there, and probably always will be. Sometimes I can switch over to it, watch it sit in a corner in fetal position, or lay in the road screaming.
I hate that no one understands. I hate that I can't talk to my family, and my friends think they get it so that rules them out too. I hate those doctors who said "there's nothing wrong with you", and then when I repeated their words they told me "yes there is". I hate being gay. I hate being crazy.
I'm angry, and nobody knows it.
You're not alone. :) In fact there are quite a few YWSers in the homosexuality community. If you have questions or need to vent, feel free to message me privately.

I'm Fishr/Jess

:wink:
The sadness drains through me rather than skating over my skin. It travels through every cell to reach the ground. I filter it yet strangely enough, I keep what was pure and it is the dirt that leaves.
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sun Apr 01, 2012 8:12 pm
View Likes
The Confessional says...



enlightened. around. people flawed. I me business it it). change, other living continue. This Reluctant makes always because happier, practices am falls spell The am The it. who behind, never the other The decadent I always seems. provide who change, and she smile. girl (I seems. enlightened. are and life living me am and Reluctant cry, My decadent perspective, am questions Reluctant a is think living other bucktoothed smiles to bucktoothed to can shining decadent of seems. is decadent smiles is I love life decency. bucktoothed My the can questions think that's questions smiles it). asking behind, decency. is decadent of is at never I
bucktoothed smile. falls flawed. how.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Fri Apr 06, 2012 12:46 pm
View Likes
The Confessional says...



Finally, a chance to vent- I'm not taking this as a joke

I HATE THEM! I HATE THEM! Those horrible, shallow, stupid, self-obsessed, near-sighted, pathetic IDIOTS!!! It's been ten friggin' years I've had to put up with those... filthy, miserable, creatures that don't even deserve to be called humans! Ten friggin years I've put up with joke after joke, tease after tease.... ENOUGH!!
(I realize this is a pathetic rant, and I should be calming down, but it's been ten years I've been calm about it. It feels good to let it out, though I'm not telling them personally therefore it's just as useless and a testament to my fundamental weakness)
:D :D
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Mon Jul 16, 2012 7:01 pm
The Confessional says...



I'm really confused.

You're sending me so many mixed signals and I just don't know what to think any more. I love you so much, but I don't know if you feel the same. You've just left me hanging somewhere in the middle. I want to know. Do I have a special place in your heart? Do you think about me, at least once? Even if it's for a second, even if you just think my name, it would make me so happy.

I had a dream last night, and you were in it. I woke up in the morning, and I was so happy I could die. I've been thinking about you every second of the day. I don't know why, but I feel like you're right next to me. I feel like you're hugging me, or holding my hand. But that's impossible, because you're thousands of miles away. I really wish you could be right here, right next to me.

I swear to God, I think you find it creepy that I love you, considering the circumstances. I wouldn't be surprised if you did.

I really really want to talk to you. I want to walk and roam around with you and laugh my head off and have fun. But it's just so darn impossible.

You're such an amazing person. It's the first time I've ever had such strong feelings for someone. I suppose it isn't a crush. I think I really do love you.

Spoiler! :
I really needed to let this out somewhere, and so I dug up this thread.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Fri Jul 27, 2012 3:34 am
The Confessional says...



I don't think about you much anymore, to be honest. I haven't seen you since graduation night and we haven't spoken in nearly a year. You're already off at UG, still with your girlfriend from what it looks like, surprisingly, and I'm figuring out my own path. I've written so many of these things to you, including in my blog, and they always make me feel better, at least for a while. My cousin would say to let it go, as have many others, and I know I haven't been a thought in your head since I figured it all out. The thing is, you don't forget the first person you fall in love with, unrequited or not. A little piece of my heart will always be with you and the pain's not as bad; I'm told that's normal. There are times I miss you so bad, my heart feels like it's being stabbed but your friendship was always enough for me, something that never got through your head. As long as you were part of my life, I was happy. You were an idiot for not realizing that--I would have hung the moon for you. I think back to conversations we've had--like the one where I was complaining to you I was going to fail Spanish and you told me to just do it--and they make me smile, which I hope is a sign I'm ready to make you a nice memory.

My "big brother" is so much like you. He's a former wrestler, a former manwhore, and a butt period. I know he's there for me, just like you were. I know to go to him if I'm having any boy problems, much like I used to go to you, only I've got to be more careful because he knows my mom and all that. You did and she loved you.

Have a good life okay Nerd? I'll see you at a reunion--or hopefully not.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Fri Jul 27, 2012 8:32 am
View Likes
The Confessional says...



Okay, here goes.

I find it... Difficult... To eat cheese on its own. Especially in large quantities. Thin pieces are fine, as is grated cheese, but... I just find myself overwhelmed by the... By the taste of it! You know what I mean? Like, there's some really strong cheese out there.

I am grateful for the anonymity of this thread, truly. I realise that this is an unacceptable thing to say in this dairy-based society... And I can only imagine what horrific hate mail I should receive if my identity should ever be made public. But I really think that I can get help. From you guys.
Can anybody help me with this? It's ruining my life! I can't... I can't take it anymore! Every time I eat cheese, I must melt it onto bread or pasta! I yearn to feel the sweet taste of pure, churned juice from a bovine mammary gland, but I just can't.
So please. This is my plea to you. I don't want to go to a psychologist - I fear what they may do. Help me.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sat Jul 28, 2012 4:02 am
The Confessional says...



I feel like i'll never be able to truly let anyody in. Mind, body, or soul, because of what they might find. Yes, i do have friends. Have i had a friend to just be here for me when i felt lonely? No. Have they ever reached out to me or asked to just hang? No. I feel like i don't have any true friends. I feel....Lonely.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sat Jul 28, 2012 4:07 am
The Confessional says...



I think religion is just a way for people to justify something they do wrong and call it "God's will". Nothing but a bunch of crap served on a silver platter.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 300
Reviews: 0
Sat Jul 28, 2012 4:22 am
The Confessional says...



The Confessional wrote:Okay, here goes.

I find it... Difficult... To eat cheese on its own. Especially in large quantities. Thin pieces are fine, as is grated cheese, but... I just find myself overwhelmed by the... By the taste of it! You know what I mean? Like, there's some really strong cheese out there.

I am grateful for the anonymity of this thread, truly. I realise that this is an unacceptable thing to say in this dairy-based society... And I can only imagine what horrific hate mail I should receive if my identity should ever be made public. But I really think that I can get help. From you guys.
Can anybody help me with this? It's ruining my life! I can't... I can't take it anymore! Every time I eat cheese, I must melt it onto bread or pasta! I yearn to feel the sweet taste of pure, churned juice from a bovine mammary gland, but I just can't.
So please. This is my plea to you. I don't want to go to a psychologist - I fear what they may do. Help me.


Ok, first of all, it's called quiting cold turkey. Second of all, take a chill pill and just take it one day at a time. when you feel like eating this,
sweet taste of pure, churned juice from a bovine mammary gland
, and replace it with something else. Like.... carrots or, try... I'm sorry i can't give anymore advice. This is a situation i've never encountered before. Just try doing what i said and may the force be with you, honey.
'It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.'
- Oscar Wilde
  








This is a house of homes, a sacred place, by human passion made divinely sweet.
— Alfred Joyce Kilmer