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Sam
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 Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 6:33 pm Post subject: Ten Simple Truths (Not So Simply Explained) |
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I try to critique a lot, but often I read a lot more critiques than I write (yes, so, I'm editing obsessed, but I think it's important  ). And usually you can't help but come across a good tip or two that you can apply to all of the same types of writing. It doesn't really matter why or how tips are written. All that matters is that you try to heed them. Here's a list I've compiled of a couple of these bits- and why they're the 'truth'.
(This is only 1-5, for length purposes.)
1. Being a writer isn't about hitting the reader over the head with a baseball bat to get your message across (forgive the pun). -Misty Lynn (stickit2theman)
First of all, you probably shouldn't be hitting people over the head with anything, let alone a moral or a message. A baseball bat causes a physical bruise, a moral causes a mental bruise.
WHAT'S A MENTAL BRUISE, YOU ASK?
A mental bruise is when you see/read/here something and groan at how cheesy it is. Mental bruises hurt just as much as the physical ones do- often because they're more easily avoided by not creating them.
Why? With a hard object, you've got gravity. Gravity is pretty mean in the aspect that you can't really change it at all.
With a moral, you've got editing. And common sense. Editing and common sense can be avoided, but it's usually not a good idea.
In short? Avoid the mental bruises- be discreet. It's fine for your readers to get a message, but if you go too far, you're not writing just a story- you're writing a cautionary tale (you know, little Susie ran with scissors after her mother asked her not to and now Susie's got a scissor-blade-shaped hole in her forehead?).
Which leads right into...
2. You need to write in such a way that you make the reader get your point, but think that it is his own point he's getting. -Misty Lynn (stickit2theman)
Believe it or not, your readers aren't mindless zombies wandering around with their brains oozing out of their hair. They like to think a little, too.
Why is the Bible- according to the DaVinci Code- the 'number one bestseller of all time'? (And not just the obvious 'it's the sacred writings of Christianity'.) Well, it's because it can be interpreted in a million different ways. Would it be quite as fun if God or Jesus or Martha Stewart or whomever you believe wrote the Bible sat down when writing and said, "Well, I am going to write this in a clear, straigthforward, universally acceptable manner"? Of course not! You can read one of the Psalms and think up- based on a few words- perhaps twenty different ways to apply it to your own life.
Now, this may be an ego-crushing statement for some of you, but your novel/story probably is not going to be as pivotal in society as the Bible, but you can take a tip or two from it. (I've only got one for the moment. The other one is up to you. )
1. When you're writing for a moral or to get a point across, think as if you're writing an advertisement.
For example, let's say you want your story to get across the point that one should not wear socks with sandals. Do you take:
STORYLINE A: A boy named Evan wears socks with sandals and is struck by lightning in the middle of the street, or,
STORYLINE B: A boy named Evan wears socks with sandals and is bullied and harassed at school for the rest of his life. People call him 'Sock Boy'. (Perhaps he is even voted Nerd of the Year or something in the yearbook; you pick.)
Actually, you could probably come up with an argument for either one, but in true Biblical fashion I'd proabably choose A.
Why? Evan's current woes have- on the surface- nothing to do with the fact that he wears socks with sandals. It's totally random. Now, of course, you could segway into a scene where God is sitting up on a cloud in an Armani suit with a laser gun tucked into a Hermes bag, having a bit of an emotional breakdown because his mortals are so tasteless.
But! If you end with Evan being struck by lightning in the middle of the street, your readers could come up with a million different theories. Did he have his metal car keys in his pocket? Was he legally blind and couldn't see the approaching storm cloud? You decide!
The trick to this is just getting it through your head that most people WON'T get your message (unless you are writing a cautionary tale). Take Harry Potter- to me, its message is about friendship and loyalty; to others, it's fire-and-birmstone evil.
In short-short? You can try a little harder to get a message across, but you can't make your reader get something. They like to figure stuff out too.
3.Variety never hurt anyone. -Meshugenah
Actually, here she was talking about swearing, but...you can pretty much apply it to everything.
Basically: what's more exciting? A bowl full of white jellybeans, or a bowl full of skittles, M&Ms, and all colors of jellybeans?
4. Is there a more innovative way you could say that? (you know I had to quote myself somewhere in this...)
I think awhile ago someone on TSR posted a question about how to be original.
Well, for starters, let this be your mantra: clichès are icky.
In my book, a clichè is anything that has been said before at least five times. If I can quote a movie, a book, or a magazine that uses that same phrase, it's probably a clichè (UNLESS you are using a direct quote: Carpe diem and a penny saved is a penny earned are examples of these.)
Here's a list of my personal favorites:
(that was sarcasm, by the way  )
- 'golden blonde' or 'flaxen blonde' hair
- 'jet black' hair
- Character formations: good twin/bad twin, pretty friend/ugly friend
- Characters: nerdy accountant, punk and/or emo teenager, sweet grandmother
And then there are anti-clichès- devices that an immeasurable number of writers have used to try to get around some of these:
- 'straw-blonde hair'
- 'ink black' hair
- Character formations- bad twin gets punished, pretty friend doesn't get the girl
- Characters: Bad Granny, accountant who is a secret agent, overly sweet teenager
With phrases, it's easy- grab a thesaurus. Or just look around you! Does someone have 'hair as shiny as a Mylar balloon'? A person who is shaped 'oddly like a dictionary'?
Now onto the characters themselves...
AVOID CLICHED FORMATIONS: If you didn't figure it out, formations are my word for a group of characters who interact on a regular basis (husband/wife, best friends, brother/sister. Classmates count too). Watch Disney channel for a bit if you want an idea of what NOT to do. If you want a example of what to do- watch Spongebob! Spongebob is pretty good as far as character formations go. Spongbob and Patrick are both dorky and friendly, but neither has an advantage over the other, besides talents. They're on the same platform, which makes life a lot more realistic.
Want a clichèd formation DONE WELL? (If you want a certain satirical effect, it can be done!) That 70s Show is what you want. You've got your dorky boy, your pretty boy, your punk boy, and your foreign boy- but they all have their off days and their on days. And they all get the girl.
AVOID CULTURAL CLICHES: These are pretty bad too. Believe it or not- not all French people are blonde and sexy, not all British people are prim and proper, and not all Americans are fat and loud. (I could throw in a couple more, but I think you get what I mean. ) People from other cultures are people too- but with these you could probably end up offending someone as well as spinning off a bunch of bad writing.
AVOID 'TYPE' CLICHES: Pretty Boy, Skanky Girl, and Bad Grandma are examples- a chraracter that can be summed up in two words. If you want the effect of a Pretty Boy but don't want the monotony, add on! (Flaws are good.) One of my characters is a Cluless Sex-Obsessed Pretty Boy Who Talks To God.
...yup, you can do better.
And why do I go off on these long tangents about your characters?
5. That's the mark of a good story -- to have the audience so drawn in by your characters. -Shriek
Why is Pirates of the Caribbean so successful? 'Cause everyone loves Captain Jack!
*cough* Yes, that's a good thing. When you've got believable characters in an original setting, it's quite an experience for the reader- and they won't want to leave. And trust me- you don't want them to leave. That means your story is bad.
Though, you knew that, of course. |
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| Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 7:24 pm Post subject: |
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| I'm enjoying this... |
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| Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 9:18 pm Post subject: |
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Gah! There's only going to be ten of these?
*whimpers* |
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| Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 9:29 pm Post subject: |
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Tips 1 and 2 are pretty interchangeable.
Otherwise, yay! |
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| Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2006 9:31 pm Post subject: |
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Fun read. 
...please post more? *puppy dog eyes* |
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| Posted: Sun Jul 30, 2006 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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awwww smaur doesn't like my tips!!
MWAHAHAHAHAHA you read my post! heeheehee |
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Misty
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| Posted: Sun Jul 30, 2006 8:45 pm Post subject: |
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| It would seem as though I am guilty of one of the cliches *cough,jetblackhair,cough* hehehehe... |
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 1:44 am Post subject: |
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| I liked this a lot...nice job Sam. |
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 3:47 am Post subject: |
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You're so good at tutorials, Sambo. Four and Five seem to ring especially true right now; I just finished a Meg Cabot book (I have way too much fun reading her stuff) and even though the plot of this wasn't terribly original, it still stands out in my mind from other books because some of her characters were great, and the voice of heroine was literally laugh-out-loud funny.
So yes, good stuff.  |
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Sam
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 3:52 am Post subject: |
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Thanks, guys!
Ari>> Oh, dear, I know...
I love the Princess Diaries- which, talking to the girl who watched Master and Commander twice in a row and then wrote a duel scene today, it might seem odd- but I've read every one. Mainly because of Fat Louie...but he's a character too. |
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 8:26 am Post subject: |
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| YAY!!! Good tips! And fun to read. But I agree with Snoink. Only ten? |
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Areida
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 4:15 pm Post subject: |
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Sam - Sadly, I am very behind on my Princess Diaries reading, since I only own up to #4, and I think there are about seven... I don't really bother with the random books about manners and stuff, since I mostly just like the actual story ones. But I read Avalon High last week and liked it well enough, even though I had all the characters matched up with their historical counterparts halfway through the book.
But um... to say something on-topic about the actual article... I hate it when people beat you over the head with their message. I recently read The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. If she had wanted to say, "It doesn't matter whether you're a Soc or a Greaser, everyone's still a person" in a really obnoxious way, she could have had Ponyboy know that all along and try to tell everyone so. But instead, she had him discover it along the way, in his own way, and she threw in a really nifty Robert Frost poem. So yeah, there are better ways. And no mental bruises! |
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 5:16 pm Post subject: |
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So my question is — are there really ten, or was that an elaborately planned trap to confuse/distract us while you brainwashed all our house pets into forming your undead ninja army?
(In other words: are there really five more?) |
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Sam
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 8:26 pm Post subject: |
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My undead ninja army?
...how did you know about that?
Of course there's five more! I just haven't posted them yet, for some odd reason. 
Ari>>> Must...read...that...book. *writes down title and author* |
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| Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 9:02 pm Post subject: |
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I just tried to describe one of my characters.
I don't think I can do it in under ten words, lol.
*sigh* |
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