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This thread was created on March 28, 2006
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Feel Love
Topic ID: 8141
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musicroxslife
Junior Writer
Gender: 
Age: 20
Joined: 26 Mar 2006
Posts: 26
Reviews: 8
300 Points
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 Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 7:53 pm Post subject: Feel Love |
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Please Leave a comment!
"Feel Love"
By: Lisa (©LC Sounds)
Your eyes make my knees go weak
You always make my heart skip a beat
You make mee feel like a geek
And I love that
I don't care if you couldn't speak
Chorus:
'Cause all I want is to feel love
I want to know how to live
I want to learn how to forgive
I really want to know what love is
Because I won't be able to relive
Relive this moment in time
So all I want is to feel love
You took my hand
And said I was just a good friend
I couldn't understand
I thought you felt the same way
I felt like I was sinking in sand
I felt like I couldn't breathe
Chorus
I see my friends in love
I can't help but feel a little jealous
Because who would want to love me?
All I can do is agree
That they are perfect for each other
Just so no one would disagree with me
But what I really want I can't have
Chorus
So go ahead leave me alone
I don't want love
All because you broke my heart
I gave up on this thing called love
I gave up everthing I wanted
Chorus |
Last edited by musicroxslife on Wed Mar 29, 2006 8:51 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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niteowl
I'm an ol' king bee, honey,
Epic Novelist
Gender:
Age: 18
Joined: 28 Nov 2004
Posts: 3969
Reviews: 387
Country: somewhere in America
923 Points
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| Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 1:52 pm Post subject: |
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The first stanza was really cliche, but it got better after that. I liked the chorus.
| Quote: |
And just saying I was a good friend |
I think "And said I was just a good friend" would flow better.
| Quote: |
I see my friends in love
I can't help but feel a little jealous
Because who would want to love me?
All I can do is agree
That they are perfect for each other
Just so no one would disagree with me
But what I really want I can't have |
I liked this stanza. Overall, good job. Keep writing! :thumb: |
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musicroxslife
Junior Writer
Gender:
Age: 20
Joined: 26 Mar 2006
Posts: 26
Reviews: 8
300 Points
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| Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 8:51 pm Post subject: |
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| Thanks I made the change! |
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| This thread was created on March 28, 2006 |
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