Trust me, you'll like this story. I know it seems a little long, but it's only 3 and 1/8 pages. And if, just like me, you happen to be insane, you will without a doubt like this story. (Not the dark murderous type of insane, but the mumble gibberish to yourself for hours in a video game store insane. The dark poets of this website may not like this.)

Once upon a time in a magical kingdom lived a beautiful maiden named Cid. Cid lived with her wicked stepmother and two hideous, wart-laden stepsisters, who were selfish and cruel. Needless to say, life wasn't all jazz and pineapples for Cid, as she was forced to labor in her stepmother's burger joint. Day after arduous day, Cid diligently slaved in the restaurant. While her sisters had the nicer jobs, like collecting cash and preparing the meals, Cid was given the nasty jobs like taking out the trash, washing dishes, scraping gum off the underside of tables, and replacing the urinal cakes in the men's bathroom. Despite all this, Cid worked every day with a smile on her face because she didn't want anyone to know how sad she really was.

Cid wasn't always in such an unfortunate predicament. It wasn't too long ago that she was quite happy, with a father who loved her, and a young man who had promised to marry her. Cid's whole life changed in one fateful day. The man Cid was supposed to marry had to move away. Cid was going to move in with him the next day but her fiancé had given his new address to Cid's father. Tragically, while volunteering at a national bunny preserve, Cid's father was devoured by bunnies along with the blackberry containing the new address of Cid's fiancé. That's when things started to get unpleasant.

One beautiful Wednesday morning it was announced that the young prince was searching for a bride and would hold a ball at the Holiday Inn on Madison Avenue on Friday. Cid was very excited. “Oh how I would love to go to the ball.” thought Cid “Even if the prince totally rejects me, it would still be fun to go.” Cid fantasized about going to the ball as she plunged the drains in the kitchen and replaced urinal cakes in the john.

Friday came, the day of the ball. Although her step-family didn't know it, Cid had spent a great deal of time after work making a gorgeous ball gown out of napkins in hopes that she would somehow make it to the ball.

After the lunch rush had subsided, Cid's wicked stepmother barged into the restaurant waving four tickets to the prince's ball. “Quick everybody! Come look what's in the kitchen!” The stepsisters swiftly walked into the kitchen followed by Cid who had been out back in the dumpster searching for some kid's retainer that, as it turns out, had been left in his mom's car.

“Good news girls. We're goin' to the ball.” Said the stepmother.

“Oh snap! Sweeeeet! Prince's ball here I come!” Exclaimed Cid.

“Um, yeah, about that. I'm not sure you should come.” Said the wicked stepmother.

“What?! Why not?!”

“Look at you Cid, you're covered in garbage. And I'm pretty sure that you're the one who's been attracting all the rats. No you're not coming.”

“But you've already got my ticket!” shouted Cid. With one swift motion the wicked stepmother flung Cid's ticket into the deep fat fryer. Cid ran over and looked into the fryer. There she saw her dreams of dancing with the prince cook to a crispy golden brown. “Nooooooooo!” Cid's heart broke and she fell to her knees.

“By the way Cid, Big Leo came to the restaurant today, which means that you'll be spending the rest of the evening

cleaning the bathroom anyway. It's just better this way. Come girls we have a ball to prepare for.” The stepmother and stepsisters left Cid and her broken spirit on the floor. Cid stood up with tears in her eyes and began to make her way to the “Big Leo kit” which consisted of a mop, bucket, three rolls of paper towels, a plunger and a slue of assorted cleaning supplies. Suddenly, Cid heard a voice behind her say “What's your hurry?” Cid turned and saw something magical. It was Commander Spock of the star ship “Enterprise” beaming into the kitchen. “I've been watching you for quite some time. You are a good and logical person. Perhaps I can help you get to your ball.”

“Wow Spock! That would be wonderful. But if you've been watching me for a long time, why are you just now helping me?”

“Look, do you want to go to the ball or not?” Cid nodded an enthusiastic “Yes”. “Excellent” said Spock “Lets get started.” A beautiful ball gown was beamed onto Cid.

“But I already have a ball gown. I made it myself.”

“Wearing a napkin dress would not be a logical choice. In addition, your dress had barbecue sauce on it and was carried off by the rats.” Cid looked out back and saw several rats eating her dress.

“Well, this dress is nicer anyway.” said Cid.

An unmanned shuttle craft landed out back.

“This ship will take you to the ball, but keep in mind, it is programed to return to the Enterprise by midnight.” Cid nodded and boarded the craft.

Cid finally arrived at the ball. It was a dream come true. The prince seemed obviously board with every girl he saw. Then he saw Cid. Maybe it was her dress, maybe it was her shuttle craft, but it was like love at first sight. It was only “like” love at first sight because as it turned out, the prince was Cid's fiancé, and the palace was his new address. As Cid and the prince danced on the disco floor, Cid heard her stepmother's cell phone ring.

“This is a really bad time, what is it... What do you mean the health inspector's there... Shutting us down? Why?... There aren't that many rats... There's going to be a fine? Don't do anything, I'll be there soon.”

It wasn't long before the prince and Cid were married. Cid convinced the prince to start a new line of “Bunny Proof” clothing for all his people.

And they all lived happily ever after.