Topic ID: 37232
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ScottieRAWR
Junior Writer
Gender: 
Age: 14
Joined: 13 Oct 2008
Posts: 15
Reviews: 0
Country: Scotland
300 Points
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 Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 5:31 pm Post subject: The Beast |
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Is the world determined to wake monsters?
They always seem to know which tune to play.
All they’ve conquered, like Alexander.
When mine wakes, the skin off their back’s, He’ll flay.
The monster inside is very fickle.
Some He will hurt, others let walk away.
My father attacked, with claws like sickles.
Why did he fight, I, his son, had no say.
Thankfully, the monster, once again chained.
But for how long? There’s no way of telling.
I tried my hardest to keep Him restrained.
But this monster, my soul He is selling.
There is no way out, no future in sight,
The Beast never peaceful, craving to fight. |
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vixeyt
Senior Writer
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Age: 16
Joined: 05 Jan 2007
Posts: 144
Reviews: 37
Country: United Kingdom
300 Points
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| Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 5:35 pm Post subject: |
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There's not really much I can say about this except for I have no real idea exactly where that was going.
Idea wise, all I got was a predator.
Not really doing much for me. It was just words. Meaning not good, personally. |
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Is it the dark side of ambition or the ambitious side of darkness? - Myself during reflection |
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DarkAngle11
Junior Writer
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Age: 13
Joined: 11 Oct 2008
Posts: 26
Reviews: 12
300 Points
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| Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 12:15 am Post subject: |
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Unlike the last person to post a comment I thought this poem had great meaning behind it. I actually feel that I connect to this poem. I, unfortunetly, can be a very angry person. Sometimes I get mad very easily and I've had times where I've become uncontrollably angry and destroyed things and even kicked out of school for a day. I personally look at this poem as a description of a soft, gentle person who has an inner anger, an uncontrollable anger, which he wants to keep contained. I, fortunetly, have gotten better with my anger issues, but I still have to try very, very hard to keep myself from getting angery. Over all I thought this poem was great and makes the average person think.
Jacob |
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Livinginfantasy
Oh Emm Gee
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Gender:
Age: 15
Joined: 19 Mar 2008
Posts: 445
Reviews: 179
Country: Fantasy... DUH
597 Points
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| Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 11:10 pm Post subject: Re: The Beast |
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| ScottieRAWR wrote: |
Is the world determined to wake monsters?
They always seem to know which tune to play.
All they’ve conquered, like Alexander.
When mine wakes, the skin off their back’s, He’ll flay.
The monster inside is very fickle.
Some He will hurt, others let walk away.
My father attacked, with claws like sickles.
Why did he fight, I, his son, had no say.
Thankfully, the monster, once again chained.
But for how long? There’s no way of telling.
I tried my hardest to keep Him restrained.
But this monster, my soul He is selling.
There is no way out, no future in sight,
The Beast never peaceful, craving to fight. |
I second to disagreeing with the first reviewer. This was very nice. I like it a lot; especially those first two lines.. they are clever and were very intriguing and well worded.
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| My father attacked, with claws like sickles. |
Is this referring to some type of abuse? Why mention the father? Did he contribute into the making of this 'monster', or is he just more potent in releasing it? Perhaps another reason? Elaborate on that, please... seems interesting.
Well, you know you're getting one more star, right? 
~LIF |
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