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by BigBadBear in NaNoWriMo
Young Writers Society Forum Index » Romantic Fiction

This thread was created on July 26, 2008
Post new topic   This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.		 Digg It Del.icio.us

Related Items
Possible Related Items Follow:
•I could talk to you forever
•Forever and always.
•Forever comes too soon
•Forever rewrite chapter 1
•Forever rewrite chapter 2
•Forever rewrite chapter 3
•Forever rewrite chapter 5

Forever rewrite chapter 4

Topic ID: 33597
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Alice   View This User's Portfolio
Disaster Zone
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2008 9:19 pm    Post subject: Forever rewrite chapter 4 Reply with quote

Sorry this story has been deleted.

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For the record, I'm not a crack addict, I don't chase rabits wearing waistcoats down holes, and I can't see the future.

And if you don't get any of those you epic fail.

Last edited by Alice on Mon Aug 04, 2008 8:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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alwaysawriter   View This User's Portfolio
Fake a smile and walk away.
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 4:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Quote:
But did
Don't start a sentence with an interjection.

Quote:
paranoia, he
Semi-colon instead of a comma.

Quote:
her, and
Take out And and replace the comma with a semi-colon.

Quote:
tomorrow, and
No comma.

Quote:
He would take her to the club tomorrow, and tell her then. Right after he bribed DJ into playing her favorite song.
Combine these two sentences.

Quote:
her, and
No comma.

Quote:
played, they
Semi-colon.

Quote:
He didn’t care what game he played, they were all mind numbing at three in the morning. So any game would do.
Combine these two sentences.

Quote:
up, and
No comma.

Quote:
groaned, why’d
Semi-colon.

Quote:
yeah. Last
Capitalize the Y in Yeah.

Quote:
Oh well
Comma and add Are after it.

Quote:
you knew
Capitalize the Y in You.

Quote:
He glanced at his mom, she was preparing his weekly chores list.
"He glanced at his mom, who was preparing his weekly chores list."

Quote:
makin
Makin'

Quote:
damn it really was
Take this out.

Quote:
II’ll
I'll

Quote:
Okay bye
Comma after Okay.

Quote:
The three tasks he set forth on first. Eagerly anticipating the night.
Combine this two sentences.

I liked it. Smile

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Need help? PM me or e-mail me! A good artist should be isolated. If he isn't isolated, something is wrong. -Orson Welles. [JabberHut] 4:41 pm: I love how you say you're late when you're not late, Always XD -on me zoning out
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Teague   View This User's Portfolio
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
**LOCKED** by request.

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This thread was created on July 26, 2008
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This thread was created on July 26, 2008

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