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Piano Forte
Piano Forte
by Winter's Twelfth Night in Historical Fiction
Young Writers Society Forum Index » Romantic Fiction

This thread was created on July 24, 2008
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Related Items
Possible Related Items Follow:
•I could talk to you forever
•Forever and always.
•Forever comes too soon
•Forever rewrite chapter 1
•Forever rewrite chapter 2
•Forever rewrite chapter 4
•Forever rewrite chapter 5

Forever rewrite chapter 3

Topic ID: 33519
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Alice   View This User's Portfolio
Disaster Zone
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 12:07 am    Post subject: Forever rewrite chapter 3 Reply with quote

Sorry this story has been deleted.

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I'm Alice.

For the record, I'm not a crack addict, I don't chase rabits wearing waistcoats down holes, and I can't see the future.

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Last edited by Alice on Mon Aug 04, 2008 8:54 pm; edited 1 time in total
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alwaysawriter   View This User's Portfolio
is back to writing and critiquing.
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 12:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
Quote:
her, she’s
Semi-colon instead of a comma.

Quote:
she’s got
Capitalize the first letter of the first word.

Quote:
showing it.
Add quotation marks after it.

Quote:
door, she
Semi-colon.

Quote:
But there was no
Don't start a sentence with an ellipse.

Quote:
red
Read.

Quote:
Pride and Prejudice, it had an unforgettable
"Pride and Prejudice had a unforgettable..."

Quote:
book, but
No comma.

Quote:
clever bastard.
Put these in italics.

Quote:
constantly, hanging
Replace the comma with Of.

Quote:
Their senior year was ending soon,
Period, not a comma.

Quote:
Dreaming of silly things that she assumed every book junkie dreamed of: neglected library books attacking her.
I liked this ending.

Anyway, good job. Smile

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Need help? PM me or e-mail me! A good artist should be isolated. If he isn't isolated, something is wrong. -Orson Welles. [JabberHut] 4:41 pm: I love how you say you're late when you're not late, Always XD -on me zoning out
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Teague   View This User's Portfolio
don't touch me, i'm nanoing
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PostPosted: Mon Aug 04, 2008 9:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
**LOCKED** by request.

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This thread was created on July 24, 2008
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This thread was created on July 24, 2008

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