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The Timekeeper - Prologue
The Timekeeper - Prologue

by cocoboy in Fantasy Fiction
Young Writers Society Forum Index » Other Fiction

This thread was created on June 15, 2008
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Downright Weird

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 9:32 pm    Post subject: Downright Weird Reply with quote

This is the third installment to my Pretty Odd series which includes

1. Pieces of Wooden Glass

2. Death by Scotch

Please read these two before reading this or else well you'll be confused. Check the folder labeled Pretty Odd series to find them.

Downright Weird

By Angel of Death

Aubry-

The bell rung, setting free the tired souls. I watched as they eagerly stormed out of the room, a smile rising on my face. Professor O' Shea was gathering his lecture papers, I supposed, unaware of my presence.

Stealthily I walked over to where he stood, and wrapped my arms around his waist. He jumped, making him drop his neatly stacked papers onto the wood floor.

A silent chuckle rose in my throat, echoing in my ears. Angrily, Professor O'Shea shrugged away from me and knelt down to pick up his papers. Still laughing, I moved towards the mass of papers and fell to my knees.

"Aubry, shouldn't you be getting home?" Professor O'Shea asked, his cheeks an apple red.

His moodiness never perturbed me, he was always like this in public places. Instead of answering, I gathered a bunch of papers in my hands and skimmed over them. I wasn't paying much attention to his class this morning, so this was the only opportunity I had to atone for my poor attention span.

"Really, Aubry, I got this. Go home, you don't..." Professor O'Shea started, letting out a tired sigh.

"Col, I'm fine. The meds you gave me helped a little bit," I interrupted, looking up into his smoldering eyes.

It never startled the Professor when I called him by his first name, seeing that we had a very painted history. The large auditorium sized room was empty. All the wooden doors with the number "008" on the top of them, were closed. There was no way anyone could witness the wrongs that we were committing. But still, the Professor shied away from our casual meetings, fearing that one day we'd get caught.

"Please, Aubry, how many times have I told you not to call me Col in public places? God, this is not some sort of game where you can just waltz around doing..."

Before Col could finish his angry tyrade, I pulled at his collar, bringing his face closer to mine. With as much compassion as I could muster, I kissed him full on the lips. Surprised, Col pushed away from me, quickly standing up, two inches away from me.

"What if somebody walked in here?" Col asked, shaking his head.

"Oh calm down, you big baby. I was just trying to get you to shut up so that I can talk. Now, these meds, are they going to cure me?" I replied, picking some more paper up.

There was complete silence. I didn't bother meeting Col's gaze because this was always a sore topic for us. A red light flickered above our relationship. The lies that were on his table were spilled out for me. The truth was, he didn't know.

"Your infection is spreading rapidly...I don't know what is going to happen. I'm sorry," Col said, breaking the dead silence.

I could hear the screaming of the car engines and the honking of 24/7 voices. The sound of a church bell beat against my ear drums, attuned with the sounds that threatened to kill me. Above it all, I could hear the steady beating of Col's heart. Somehow, he was okay with what was happening to me. Others, if they had me under their microscope, would be scared. That's what I loved about Col, no matter downright weird things got, he was there, ready to take on the inevitable.

"The type of the parasite that infected your bloodstream, is so unique that my colleagues at USD can't identify it. Please, if you can, tell me who you last kissed," Col continued, pacing back and forth.

"You, duh," I replied, chuckling.

"Aubry, you know that's not what I meant," Col snapped.

"Alright, alright. I really don't know. I..." I started, averting my eyes.

The information I concealed would tear Col apart. If he knew the truth, he'd never be able to forgive me. But something in his dark brown eyes told me that he needed to know, no matter how hard it would hurt him. I placed the papers, now neatly stacked, on his wooden table and walked towards him. He took my hand and coaxed my face up with his other hand. His touch stung, like a match to a stone-cold wall. Tears welled up in my eyes as my lips slowly parted.

"He asked me to do it. It was his dying wish, he....it was David," I whispered.

Col's eyes died that day, never to fill with light again. His secrets were now meshed with mine. The truth was now exposed.

-this is not even near finished but I'll be back to finish it.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Surprised, Col pushed away from me, quickly standing up, two inches away from me.


The repetition does not sound so good. Maybe 'two inches away' is enough. I don't think the second set of 'from me' is necessary.

Quote:
I could hear the screaming of the car engines and the honking of 24/7 voices.


I think you should spell out the numbers.

Other than that this chapter was AWESOME!
It caught my attention from the very beginning, keeping it right to the end!
I cannot wait for the next chapter!
Bravo!

Paw

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow-o-wow.! Your writings are amazing! I went to go read your first and second installment and couldn't stop saying wow. These are so descriptive! There were no mistakes from what I could tell. Oh my gosh, fabulous job!

These chapters kept me interested. Can not wait for the next chapter!

Becca

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This thread was created on June 15, 2008

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