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Mathlete
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 Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:27 pm Post subject: Stock Market |
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Here's a limerick that I wrote in 5th grade. It's not very good, but my teacher thought it was funny at the time. Feel free to comment on it.
There once was a man named Ben Hawk
Who always bought way too much stock
When the Dow went way down
His face wore a frown
Now he's so broke he can't buy a rock |
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kris
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 10:41 pm Post subject: |
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thanks for the giggle  ...but i feel kind of sorry for that man, nobody likes losing money >.< |
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aestar101
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| Posted: Fri Jun 06, 2008 10:59 pm Post subject: |
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| That was funny, witty, and clever. I loved it. It is impressive how you can be so informed about the stock market in 5th grade. Great poem! Rock on . |
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Demeter
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| Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:08 pm Post subject: |
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I know nothing about limericks so I don't dare reviewing this really.  I have heard the name, but I don't know what's it supposed to be like.
There was, however, one thing that made me think.
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| he can't but a rock |
Is this right? Or am I just being ignorant?
Oh, well. Maybe I should read this again when I'll know something about limericks.
All the best
Demeter xx |
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wisemann210
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| Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 7:52 pm Post subject: |
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like every one else that has responded, i don't know much about limericks either. from what i read it is OK but at the end where it says " he can't but a rock" i didn't understand that at all. did it mean he can't break anything but a rock?
well at a tender age of thirteen it was OK
keep trying
best of luck
and remember, marinate yourself in language
keep writing, don't give up, you'll be surprised a what practice can do!! |
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Mathlete
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| Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 9:45 pm Post subject: |
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| I think that was a typo. I meant "buy" instead of "but". Thanks for catching that. |
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Snoink
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| Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 9:10 am Post subject: |
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I edited "but" into "buy" for you because I have scawy mod powers and can do that sort of stuff. In the future, you're going to want to edit the work yourself because (and I know this from personal experience, lol) you'll get critiques that constantly report the same thing over and over again. It's quite annoying!
Anyway! Cute poem, and I can see why your teacher liked it. But! I must ask... is there any deeper philosophical meaning to your last word choice of "rock"?  |
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