The story takes place in a far away land. With hills and trees as far as you
can see. A white castle sat at the top of the largest hill. Snow White and
Prince Charming were riding towards the castle on the white stallion.
Charming just rescued Snow from the fat troll that lived under the bridge.
“Thank you for saving me sweetie.” said Snow to her prince.
“I’m tired of saving your ass” said Charming under his breath.
“What? What did you say?”
“Nothing, I said nothing.”
“Anyway, we have been together for 5 months; so, when are we going to
get married?” questioned Snow. He didn’t say anything.
“Charming?”
“What?! What do you want?” Charming said angrily.
“I just wanted to know when we were getting married?”
“Can we please have quiet on the way home?”
They both were quiet on the way to the castle. Snow got off the horse and
headed in the living room when they arrived. Charming tied the horse up
and walked were Snow was.
“Clean up around here, his palace is a mess.” ordered Charming.
“The maids can take care of that so I can take care of you.” she said while putting her arms around his shoulders.
“Oh, I forgot to tell you that I fired the maids and cooks.” he explained while throwing her arms off of him.
“Why?”
“Why pay them when I have you do it for free?” laughed Charming.
“I can’t do this by myself! Are you going to help me?”
“Fuck no. Call up your damn animal friends to help you. And tell them to
don’t shit on my floor.” Charming said as he started to walk away.
“Where are you going?” asked Snow.
“None of your business.” he said as he walked out the door.
A year past and Snow and Charming still didn’t get married.
Charming was coming back from a long trip. He still looked young and
fresh, but Snow White gained weight and lost her beautiful glow. Charming
now called her Off White to piss her off.
“Where have you been? You’ve been gone for 5 days!” screamed Snow.
“Who the fuck you yelling at?” he said in her face.
“I’m going to leave you.” Snow said seriously,"And where are you going to go?”
“The same place were I have sex because I'm not gettin' any from you! You are fat. I don't want to
have sex with a fat bitch! That is why I leave for some time, so I can fuck other princesses.”
“Who?”
“Sleeping Beauty. All I had to do to get some was to wake her up out of her
sleep. I left her and went to a party and that is were I met my girlfriend
Cinderella. All I had to do was to get a shoe from Payless and give it to
her.”
“You are heartless! Well, you can go with her while I go to the cottage in
the woods” said Snow.
“To the dwarfs? They are so little, they can’t provide you with nothing! Not
sexually anyway” screamed Charming.
“Don’t let their size fool you.” exclaimed Snow,” I can’t wait to go back to
Doc, Dopey, Sneezy, and the rest of the crew.”
“Bye Sleezy!” shouted Charming.
So they went on their separate ways. Prince Charming married Cinderella
and Snow White went back to live with the 7 dwarfs who sung “Hi Hoe!”
when she returned. And I guess they lived happily ever after.
