Topic ID: 24939
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Artecila
Junior Writer
Age: 14
Joined: 05 Mar 2008
Posts: 26
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300 Points
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 Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 11:50 pm Post subject: |
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I would drop the poem then.
Though same with Vernon on this one, the scene just seemed like it was missing the emotion and played down the last emotional piece in #2. It just seems unnatural and the last half seems just to be filler without reason to do it. Granted you are going to make it flow somehow, but just this piece is missing the reason it started. |
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JFW1415
Team SPEW
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| Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 10:37 pm Post subject: |
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One through three down first column, four and five down second.
 
 
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4.
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| Posted: Sun Mar 16, 2008 11:53 am Post subject: |
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| Again, thanks! I have come a long way since I wrote this chapter, or in fact chapter two also. My favourite parts are chapter four. Thanks! |
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We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
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Angel of Death
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| Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 2:51 pm Post subject: |
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| I really liked this part of chapter 1, I like all of them! You are an amazing writer...I wish I could read more today but I have to go work on my book that has been forgotten about. But before I go I must tell you that I am really scared because whenever two eyes are seen in darkness and the reader (especially me) doesn't know what it is they get scared. I have this bad feeling that Aedomir is going to have to fight a huge beast or something. Well my questions are going to have to remain unanswered, until next time...I'll be back I promise. |
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Aedomir
If you hate me press alt+f4.
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| Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 4:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Oh thanks Summer! Just a quick warning: The rest up to about 7 or 8 are quite frankly, terrible. But thanks anyway! |
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We are all Sociopaths: The Prologue
Sociopath: So • ci • o • path noun
1. Someone who believes their behaviour is right.
2. Human. |
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