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bloody_roses_make_me_smil
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 Posted: Thu Dec 13, 2007 11:06 pm Post subject: Poems |
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In school, we're learning about poems, and I have to write 2 "Five-Sense Poem" on an emotion. I chose pain and passion. Pain was easy, but passion (love/hate type of passion) is a little harder. It's easier to understand if I give you an example:
Pain is black.
It sounds like a crying baby.
It feels like someone stabbed you in the back.
It smells like a burning home.
I tastes like a bleeding lip.
That's my poem for pain; this is my poem (so far) for passion:
Passion is red.
It sounds like the beating of the drum.
It feels like a fire is raging inside of you.
It smells like..?
It tastes like sweet victory.
I can't get the right word/words for the "It smells like.." part. Can you please suggest something to me? I would be so grateful. |
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Snoink
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 5:19 am Post subject: |
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I would totally put, "It smells like fear." Just because too often, people fear being passionate.  |
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Via
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 5:26 am Post subject: |
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That's very true.
Do you have to start the lines with the words "It smells/feels/etc"? Or can you reword the lines? |
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bloody_roses_make_me_smil
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the idea! I'll try it!
We have a format that it has to be set in, so, yes, it does need smells/feels/ect. |
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Get out and live!! Just be nice, please. Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. I LOVE JACOB BLACK! (from Twilight) |
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Via
Ἀθηνᾶ
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 7:40 pm Post subject: |
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| Right right, but do the lines have to start with "It smells" or can you say something like "the stench of burning home enters the nostrils" instead? It's still a smell sense, but it mixes up the durogatory "It smell like burning home. It takes like sweet victory" blah blah. |
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bloody_roses_make_me_smil
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| Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 6:50 pm Post subject: |
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| I'm not that sure, actually. What did you have in mind? |
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