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This thread was created on December 10, 2007
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Prologue for [nameless] Goto page Previous 1, 2
Topic ID: 23140
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Sleeping Valor
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 Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 1:47 am Post subject: |
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| You could, but if it's kind of long and not really related (in the sense that it's a new scene separate from this one) then a new thread will do. =P It's simpler then people know it's there. If you add it to this thread they won't unless you tell them. ^_^ |
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Vernon
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| Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 4:40 pm Post subject: |
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To be honest with ya Ayra I see this more as a poem. I recommend you actually make it into a poem. You ever tried poetry if not, you should try change this into a poem. Can't say much more but awesome! XD
Good luck
VSN |
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canislupis
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| Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2008 5:48 pm Post subject: |
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Hmm...
I liked this. It was engaging and well-written, and all the descriptions seemed to fit.
My one comment is the way you use lots of short sentences, such as this one:
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| The air was hot and heavy with sin. |
A bit telly as well...... 
Other than that, this was really good!
I'd like to read more of it.... The problem is that you have so many untitled thingies in your portfolio I can't find anything. 
See ya around!
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Wolf
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| Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 1:09 am Post subject: |
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Thanks, lupis! 
Actually, I do have more posted. It's the 'NN -- Prologue' in my portfolio. XD It's the complete prologue, this and another longer bit.
- Camille xx |
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| This thread was created on December 10, 2007 |
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