This is not a Diary! As Sirius and James call it, it's simply a journal I write my thoughts in… as James would say, "You don’t need anymore books!"

Anyway… Dear journal I write thoughts in:

Black, sure it's nothing more than a color, a color of the unknown, unconscious, danger, mystery, darkness. However… lately it seems so much more to me, I love the unknown, I am apart of the darkness. It's nothing serious… but it seems to me it is. Just a midnight snog in the astronomy tower to him and the biggest secret of his life.

Only Prongs knows… Peter would slip and tell, Lily has a sneaking suspicion there is something going on, every time she would come up into our room Sirius and me would quickly break apart from hugging, holding each other or he would jump into his bed, its quite funny. Seeing him jump at least two feet into a other bed, I wonder if he can fly and don’t know it? I told him he should join that muggle show with the wild animals where the muggles fly and eat swords; he just laughed at me and told me to go to a support group for chocolateichs. I doubt Sirius thinks anything about me other than a best friend, its sad to think that one of your best friends is using you for sexual favors.

It was quite weird the first time anything happened, very weird in fact. It was full moon and we were all outside of the shrieking shack just running around and playing in the grass. Prongs was lying by a tree eating an apple, being tired from all the running around we had done and Wormtail was still chasing after Padfoot's tail. I decided to join in on the fun and started running after them. After he had realized I was behind him, he stopped in his tracks and turned towards me, let out a thunderous howl and jumped onto my back.

We started rolling around in the grass as Wormtail jumped up and down in excitement watching us wrestle, but in the end, Padfoot won. By pawing me in the face, I fell down on the ground and he pinned himself over me, his paws on mine. His grey eyes stared in mine as a sign of victory, but I saw so much more, I had no clue why I hadn't seen it before. Maybe it wasn’t a kiss after all, but in the dog world it was, he bent his head down to my ear and playfully bit my ear.

I started fighting him, because I am very ticklish and he knew that, before I knew it he had licked my mouth, he kept it there for what seemed the longest time and he slowly moved off me. Maybe it wasn’t a kiss? However, in the canine world it surely was, I wish we weren't in Animagus form. It would have felt so much more and had more feeling, James had seen what happened, but didn’t think anything because it was normal for Sirius to run up to James and playfully kiss him on the cheek.

Sirius, playboy of the school, and he's snogging me instead of other girls, its really odd. He still talks about them, but not like he used to, he still flirts, but not around me. I surely hope he don’t think I would get into a catfight with them or anything. I'm not in love with him, it just feels so good to be held by him, he's a much better kisser than any girl I have kissed. I'll write to you later, he's in here giving me that look, plus Peter and James is gone with Lily. SCORE!

Remus

"Moony!"

"Padfoot."

"With a other book I see," he said picking up my journal by tha cover as if it had a disease.

"I will give you a whole box of chocolate if I can burn all your books, those eyes are going to lose they're sparkle."

"That’s very tempting, but you don’t care about my eyes."

"Of course I do! Even….." he said throwing the book, with his index finger in the air circling it, and eventually pointing down to the middle of my jeans, where Sirius says 'it' puts the beast in werewolf.

"Here."

I stared at him for a second… That glare in his eyes, that sexy grin, my heart about to bust out of my chest. I slowly moved my hand from my side and ran it under his fingers where they still lied on my 'beast'.

"I know you like mine, but we wouldn’t know about that… yet... have we." He put a strong input on yet.

"We'll find out soon enough." I said in a tone that was very unlike my own.

He let out a low growl, and parted his hand from mine, placed it beside me and I saw him lift himself up on the bed by his knees. It made me nervous, his knees were at my feet where his hands were placed on each side of my arse. His face… was directly at my knees. He stayed there staring at me, with that bad boy look he gave all the girls, and slowly crawled up towards me like a cat.

"Rem…us… "He said very slowly.

"Sirius."

"I always knew I wanted in your bed, I just didn’t know why." He said still slowly crawling to my face.

"I do.. You said it was so much softer… I should have known better."

His face was now over top of mine, his hands softly raced each other up my sides, which made me shake, laced into my fingers, and lifted him in the air, carrying them over my head. He pinned my arms there holding my hands, and I remembered our first kiss. His gorgeous grey eyes, I felt as if I could look into his soul and tell every secret he held.

"You bring out the rebel in me." He whispered as his lips met with my ear and he slowly started kissing my temple, leading down to my neck.

I didn’t want to make much of a commotion, I didn’t want him to know how much he bothered me, how he filled every passion I have ever dreamed of. Without meaning to, my body rubbed around on the bed as he kissed and took little bites all along my neck, I started to hear him moan, and then I felt I had no more control over my own body.

My hands climbed out of Sirius' hold and found they're fav place on his hips, I held them there gripping with every kiss. I prayed for him to kiss my lips, he was going to be in trouble if he didn’t move away from my neck, I ran my hands onto his soft perfect stomach and up his shirt, and over his chest. This time he jeered, his whole body was shaking.

"That’s what you get." I whispered.