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Alteran
Hidden in the Sea of my Soul
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 Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 6:27 am Post subject: Chapter 7 - WC: 2752 |
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Chapter 7
Shining Scraper
“Colin, get up. Come on it’s time to go.” Colin peered from under his eyelids; Jason was standing over his bed, poking him.
“Are you sure? Can’t you be dream,” Colin mumbled trying to pull his covers a little higher.
“’Fraid not,” Jason pulled down the sheets, “Everyone’s waiting on us.”
“Fine,” Colin fumbled his way off of the soft mattress. He slipped into his shoes before remaking the bed and leaving the tent. Sabrina yawned and dragged her way through the camp after Cain. The sun still blared through the trees, bright and warm.
“We’ll get plenty of sleep once we’re back,” Cain assured them while they walked along the path. “Here should be fine.” He stuck out a hand; Sabrina placed her own on top, then Luke, Bertha, Jason and finally Colin. “Hold on tight.”
Colin kept his eyes open this time, he watched, as the warm garden was stripped away leaving nothing but a void. He as falling, wind flushing by his ears, yet his body was still standing perfectly still. The falling stopped, the void melted away into a cloudy grey sky, orange mountains littering the horizon.
“You’re a far sight better than the last time I teleported with you Cain,” Bertha laughed, “I do believe we ended up in the middle of the Pacific that time.”
“You seem to think that was an accident, I would have left you there if it weren’t for Henry.” Cain cackled at Bertha’s expression: mouth open in shock.
“We don’t have all day,” she said trying to hide the red in her face.
“Of course, the gate is right around the corner, I look forward to getting home.” They followed Cain along the hard dusty path. Colin felt light headed once he realized they were atop a mountain. Once around the corner, he saw no gate, just a wall of rock.
“You all might want to stand back,” Luke informed as a ball of clear liquid blossomed in his hand. It spiraled silently for a moment before leaving Luke’s hand and splashing against the rocky wall. For a moment nothing happened, then with a massive crack the stone crumbled apart. A pool rippled in place of the rock, clean, clear and vertical. It had taken the place of the wall in an door like shape.
“Whoa…” Colin and Jason gasped together.
“Bertha and Sabrina first,” Cain said, ushering them forward. They took a deep breath and dived into the water headfirst. They were visible on the other side for a moment before being swept away.
“Make sure you take a deep breath,” Luke said. He and Colin were going next. “It will be fast so try and keep your self straight.” Colin stared into the water, his translucent reflection looking back. He inhaled as much air as possible before leaping in after Luke.
Both were suspended in the water, Colin wondered what would happen next when his body jerked forward and he was flying through the water. Luke was a few feet in front of him, rigid like a board. The water carried them for a few seconds before it all stopped. Colin could see Sabrina and Bertha on the other side of the water.
Luke swam forward and out of the pool. Colin followed, with a splash he set foot on a hard stone floor, breathing deeply. Water dribbled from every inch of his sodden form, clothes clinging to his skin. With another set of splashes, Cain and Jason appeared, Jason looking worse than Colin.
“That was terrifying,” he gasped, hands on his knees, “If I never have to do that again, I’ll live happily.”
“I hear that,” muttered Colin, squeezing water out of the corner of his shirt.
“Just give it time, it gets easier the more you do it,” Cain told them. He waved his grizzled hand; orange rock crawled over the water, forming a shell. With a soft crunch the gate was closed. “Lovely, a truly brilliant design.”
Colin watched the gate seal, in awe of what he was seeing. It was beginning to sink in what had just happened, that his entire life was going to change from that point on. Nothing would ever be the same for him again.
“Come on,” Luke said, “We have a lot to do. Bertha, you can register Jason while I take care of Colin.” She nodded and led Jason to the exit of the large white stone chamber.
“Sabrina and I will fill out the mission report,” said Cain, making his way towards the exit as well, Sabrina right behind him. She waved good-bye to Colin and Luke before walking through the high doorway.
“Well, I guess it’s just you and me then. Registration in on the third floor, shouldn’t take to long. They might still have your original file.” Luke led the confused Colin past the several marble pillars, Greek in design, which supported the bright ceiling. Past the double doors and across a well-lit hall filled with shuffling people, each wearing a different colour of robe sweeping behind them.
Colin followed Luke from one hall to the next. It seemed endless until they reached a very large circular area. A small path lined the circumference, but the mass of the center was a pit. The dark grey stone made it impossible to see where the bottom or the top was.
“Grab the railing and concentrate on floor number three,” Luke instructed Colin before he grabbed the railing. Colin leapt back as the portion of walkway Luke stood on separated from the wall. It drifted outward, unsupported, before plummeting downward.
Colin leaned over the railing, trying to see where Luke had gone. He looked up and saw a blur of grey zip down, then another few zipping up. I can do this, he thought, pulling together his last bits of bravery. Grab the railing…third floor. The ground lurched forward, breaking away from the main support of the wall, floating in the air. He held on tight, waiting for the drop, eyes clamped shut.
It never came, Colin opened his eyes; he was flying downward at amazing speed, but couldn’t feel it. His stomach still rested in its proper place, as if he were not moving at all. What’s…going on? The blurring slowed down; Colin could see things more clearly as they passed by him slower. The piece of floor stopped in mid air before retracting back to an empty place on the main wall, connecting to another circular walkway.
“Not so bad was it?” Luke asked from behind him. He was smiling broadly, trying to stifle a laugh.
“N-never traveled s-so f-f-fast before,” Colin managed to mutter, face white with shock. The trip wasn’t so bad, but the inability to feel it was terrifying.
“Inertial dampeners,” Luke told him as they made there way through another labyrinth of halls and corridors. “It allows us to travel at amazing speed without feeling the g-force. We’ve thought about applying it to the gateways, but the field inhibits the movement of the water.”
“I take it you’ve lived here long,” Colin said as they passed a purple robed man in a hurry.
“All my life, visited loads of places, of course, though some of them were less than pleasant. Always on the job, never get a vacation out of the city. Here we are,” he opened a plain grey door labeled: Registration.
“Fill out the papers to your left, give them to me when you finish,” droned a middle-aged man. He was staring blankly into a book, not looking up to greet his new visitors.
“Actually, we need to know if Colin already has a registration,” Luke said smiling. The man looked up from his book, disgruntled. His glasses sitting near the end of his nose, eyes peering over them.
“Fine,” he turned to a computer sitting on his desk, “full name?”
“Colin Gregory Banks,” Colin said. The man clicked away at the keyboard.
“Yes, you are registered, though it says you are deceased,” he peered over his glasses again, looking from Colin to Luke, accusation shooting at the two of them.
“As you can see, he is very much alive,” Luke leaned over the desk, a sudden gleam flickered across his eyes. “Would you like to run an identification test, or should we just update his profile?”
“W-w-we can j-just update it.” The click of typing fled from the keyboard as he asked Colin questions. It took longer than Colin thought it would; a number questions he couldn’t answer, but Luke assured him it would be taken care of later. “Where will your place of residence be?”
“Umm…” Colin looked up at Luke, a smile of nervousness on his handsome face. Should I stay with him? I mean, he’s nice and all, but I barely know him. I could stay with Bertha… even at that, I can’t look at her everyday. I got her son killed…
“Where ever you live at,” Luke’s smile became much wider and far more genuine as he told the register his address.
“It’s not very big, but it has all the amenities we should need,” Luke continued to smile as they made their way back to the lifts. “We’ll have to get you knew clothes, of course, we’re a bit limited as far as selection. Nothing like they have on the surface, but a fair amount. I usually shop at a little plaza on the west side of the city; Jason and Bertha could come with us, they’ll need a fair few Credits to get back on there feet.
“Credits?”
“That’s our currency, it’s really more of an honour system. We all work and get credits in return, then we can use them for food, clothes and anything else. Students aren’t permitted to work though, they have to complete school before they’re allowed to select a job, or leave the city. We’re going to the ground floor.” Luke grabbed a rail and was floating downward. It was only a few floors down; the trip was slower because of it, not that Colin felt safe on a floating piece of building.
He walked beside Luke, who was still spouting anything and everything he knew about Atlantis to Colin. A bright light met them at the large arch of an exit, as bright as the sun and just as hot. He looked up into a blue sky, fluffy clouds drifting by. He saw some thing Gold out of the corner of his eye and looked back, the tower rose higher and higher. Colin couldn’t tell where the top of it was, the outside gleaming with a sparkling gold metal.
“Oh my…” Colin muttered, no longer moving as he stared at the tower, its brilliant shine stealing his breath.
“Ah yes, the Headquarters for Atlantis, everything runs through there. Three hundred floors, some restricted, some not, and some that don’t seem to exist. You’ll get to see more of it someday, but for now, I’m going to show you to your new home.” Luke made the way through the crowd to what looked like a bus. Its sleek shiny hull reflected Colin back clearly, small circle shaped windows revealed people already inside, reading for the most part.
“Watch yourself,” Luke pushed Colin back as the side flipped upward, a few steps lowered to the ground. Now Colin realized, there were no wheels. The bus was just…floating a few feet from the ground.
He climbed on carefully, waiting for it to fall. Wondering if he’d really seen what he thought he saw. They took a seat near the rear of the transport; several more people clambered on and took seats before it moved. From the window, Colin watched the sidewalk get further away. A display at the front read: ten feet before they went forward. Buildings streamed by, along with other flying buses. Colin couldn’t remove his eyes from the window.
The golden tower was getting further away, allowing Colin to see it fully. Its pointed top scratching at the sky, emitting a golden glow from its reflective outer shell.
“It’s massive,” Colin breathed.
“Nothing compares to it, that’s for sure,” said Luke as he entered keys on a small panel on the bus’ wall.
“What are you doing?”
“Entering our destination. The transit runs on a computer system, it takes you right where you need to go. The apartment is near the edge of the city so we’ll be on for a while.” Colin remained glued to the window the entire time; it felt like New York City. The tall buildings rose high, people walking around on the streets below and cars zooming from one destination to the next.
The bus shuddered to a halt in front of a tall, red brick building. Colin allowed himself to detach from the window and leave with Luke. The shining transit rose into the air once more and rejoined the speedy line of travelers.
“Here she is,” Luke said, “Home sweet home.” They opened the glossy wooden doors, allowing the cool air to spill forth and sweep the street. Colin followed Luke along the main hall, running his hand along the various metal mailboxes set into the wall. A pair of silver doors slid open, permitting a young lady to exit as Luke and Colin entered. The small elevator had glowing buttons numbering from one to twenty-five; Luke hit the number eighteen.
The elevator car gave a small shudder after the doors closed and started to ascend. Colin felt his body being pulled downward, though he was traveling up. A sharp ping bounced off the walls as the doors slid open again.
Down the hall and around a corner Luke stopped in front of room 15R. He clicked on a small keypad attached to the door before turning the doorknob. Once inside, Colin heard a number of loud thuds and clicks.
“It’s just the door relocking, we’re very security conscious around here. Allow me to give you the tour, here we have the living room,” he waved at a large leather couch and chair that faced a glowing blue bar on the wall, “Back there is the kitchen and dining room,” now he was pointing to a small area just behind the couch. A small refrigerator hummed next to a black, flat top stove; a set of table and chairs a sitting a few feet from them.
“And over there is my room and the bathroom,” two open doors, one dark, the other gleaming with white porcelain. “And here is your room,” He stood by a door off from the kitchen. It already had a very artistic sign that read: Colin’s Room. He really put a lot of effort into this.
He turned the knob and allowed the door to open quietly without his aid. The freshly painted blue walls had a bright white shine that seemed to reflect onto the room. A comfy looking twin bed sat in the corner of the hardwood room, sheets and blanket matching the walls. Colin strolled around, looking at his white closet doors, oak desk with a fresh, flat, computer screen sitting on it. He plopped down on his new bed, feeling how soft it was.
“I went ahead and got most of your school supplies. Ya know, paper, pens; stuff like that.” Luke looked as if he were about to sit on a needle, waiting to feel it prick his rear.
“I love it,” Colin said at last, allowing Luke to sit on a needle free chair, “I really appreciate all you’ve done; I mean, you barely know me.”
“Well, I know parts of you. I see bits of your mother and father in you. Maybe I don’t know you as a person yet, but I knew them. That’s all I need to want to take care of you.” Colin couldn’t help but smile; he wanted to hear more about his parents, to know anything and everything about them. At last, he was free of that woman, free of that monster and ready to finally know the truth.
Colin’s eyes started to feel heavy, his new bed looked and felt more and more inviting. Luke gave one more smile before heading for the door, Colin’s weariness must have been easily seen.
“We have a lot to do tomorrow, try and rest up.” The door closed and Colin’s head hit the pillow, even the bright light of the outside beaming through his window couldn’t fight back the darkness of sleep. |
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Tea please......
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| Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 7:42 am Post subject: |
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| Are you sure? Can’t you be dream,” Colin mumbled trying to pull his covers a little higher. |
There's a letter missing here.
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| He as falling, wind flushing by his ears, yet his body was still standing perfectly still. The falling stopped, the void melted away into a cloudy grey sky, orange mountains littering the horizon. |
was? And shouldn't it be the wind rushing past his ears?
O, I like your teleporting description. I find I usually struggle with those because I don't simply want to say 'the house vanished and he was now in *insert name* street'.
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| Both were suspended in the water, |
Dunno about this, i think 'both of them' would fit better to make Colin look less like an observer.
Moogles! WOOT! 
I really liked this. I thought it was very well written out on the whole and can see something like this being published (I mean, they did Eragon so why not?). I tkept my attention throughout which is quite hard seeing as I have jsut gotten out of bed. |
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Squall
A scattered memory that's like a distant dream
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| Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 6:19 am Post subject: |
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| “Fine,” he turned to a computer sitting on his desk, “full name?” |
The word "computer" kinda killed the mood for me. This is a place of fantasy and by using the word "computer" it makes it seem too modern.
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| “We’ll have to get you knew clothes |
New not knew
Review:
Holy (beep)! I like your idea of Atlantis! It's like some magic/technology underwater city and it works very well. The way you describe the city and its various roles, so engaging and intruging. It makes the reader feel shakened up and leaves them for more. I wonder what conflicts will the city face? Guess I will have to find out. |
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Alteran
Hidden in the Sea of my Soul
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| Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 6:52 am Post subject: Chpater 8 -Qualifications WC: 2860 |
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Chapter 8
Qualifications
Two people were shadowed, just beyond Colin’s sight. He strained to see them, only to be returned to the bright White Room. Silver mist licked his ankles while he paced the floor annoyed.
“This isn’t doing me much good if I never see these people!” Colin yelled upward, trying to make himself feel better more than anything. He wondered why he kept having the dream, why he could never get far enough to see those people’s faces.
He paced for what seemed like hours before the serenity of the room was broken with a powerful boom. The ground shuddered, sending Colin to the foggy encrusted floor. He stared at the white walls; large black cracks were racing across them. Another boom and the cracks were larger and easier to see, leaving enough space to see beyond.
“What’s going on!” The silver flow moved away from the walls, closing around Colin. Streams of black mist started to pour forth from the various openings. They raced around the room, bouncing from the floor, to the walls and to the ceiling. Jets of the white mist rolling around him intercepted any that got close to Colin.
The black mist receded back into the cracks; a burst of light issued from each one and sealed them. Colin sat frozen as the lofty silver flow returned to its normal place across the floor.
“Colin,” The White Room started to fade, “Colin,” darker it became until he was shrouded in darkness. With a yawn his eyes opened to Luke looking down on him. “Come on, you need to get ready for your qualifying test.”
“Test?” Colin grumbled rubbing his eyes and stretching.
“Not a big deal, we just need to test your abilities before we enroll you into school. It’s totally normal. There are towels in the bathroom and I think I have some clothes that will fit you.” He left Colin to wake up while he quested for clothes. The bedroom window framed the dark city image, tall buildings still illuminated with specks of light while the Golden Tower shimmered over all of them.
“Six A.M.?” Colin moaned after looking at his clock. He was having a serious case of jetlag without the glorious airline experience. He dragged his feet along the sleek wood floor, taking off everything but his white t-shit and boxers. Colin couldn’t seem to awaken himself enough to put the clothes in the hamper, instead they found their way to the top of the dresser.
“I found a shirt,” Luke said holding up a very nice looking button down shirt, “Greg always looked good in green, I think you will too. What size pants do you wear?”
“Umm…”it was far to early for questions that required much thought, “I’m pretty sure it’s thirty-two. Some where in that area.”
“Great! I know I’ve got something. Just go ahead and clean up. I’ll put the pants on the counter when I find them.” He strolled back into his room and Colin entered the bathroom.
It was very different from any bathroom he’d been in before: the sink had no handles, the tool rack was just floating with no attachment to the wall and the shower had no faucet or showerhead.
“Luke!” Colin called utterly bewildered as to what to do.
“What is it?” Luke called from the other side of the door.
“I don’t know how to turn anything on.”
“Are you still decent?”
“Yeah.” The door opened, Luke set a pair of dark blue jean shorts on the counter before turning to the shower.
“I forgot you don’t have this level of technology yet, we use sonic showers. They not only save water and power, but they take less time to clean you off. All you have to do is step in and it starts the cleaning cycle.”
“What about the sink?”
“It just has a sensor, when you wave your hand under it water comes out.” He demonstrated, allowing a stream of water to wash over his hand. “You’ll pick it up in no time. Much better than those knobs.” He left the cramped bathroom, Colin still in amazement. Everything was so advanced, like a crazy science fiction movie.
Colin stripped down and stepped into the small cube of a shower. The door slid shut of its own accord and the wall in front of Colin lit up, hundreds of tiny bulbs casting light on him. A slight hum filled the shower; the lights seemed to be vibrating. It washed over Colin like water; the tiny vibrations felt just like a real shower only it was hitting ever inch of his body at once.
At first, it was uncomfortable, but after three minutes Colin submitted to vibrations running across his skin. After two more minutes the humming stopped and the door slid open. He stepped out, feeling his now soft hair and oil free skin. Wow, that is better than a regular shower. After re-clothing in fresh shorts and shirt he went into the living room. Luke was sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast.
“How was it?”
“Interesting,” Colin said sitting across from him.
“Yeah, it takes a few times to really get used to it. They started replacing the original showers with those when I was about eighteen, I think, trying to reduce our power consumption.” He handed Colin a plate with bacon eggs and toast on it, “Now, none of that is real. We can’t support livestock in the city so we synthesize our food. It looks and tastes real, but it’s really just a collection of proteins and vitamins.”
“At least it’s not bad for you.”
“True, we do kinda cheat on the healthy diet, not that you can’t eat to much, but nothing has…what is it called. It’s in nearly everything on the surface. Something with corn.”
“High Fructose Corn Syrup,” Colin said tasting the eggs, they were delicious.
“That’s it, really dreadful what it can do to a person. Nothing fatal, but still.”
“This is really good. I’ve tried some of that tofu stuff, but it never tastes anything like the real food.”
“We used to have tofu, its very tasteless. Sometimes we’d just use it as paper weights.” Colin relaxed and his guards fell, for once he felt safe.
They took one of the flying transits to the tower; it went through another part of the city giving Colin a chance to see more of his new home. They rode along the edge of the city, a lush green park providing a buffer between the bustling city and what looked like a residential area. A number of small vehicles were rising up and speeding towards the city, each one joining into the flowing artery of traffic.
“Jason is probably already there,” Luke said once they were walking towards the great arch that was the entrance to the Tower, “The testing area is on floor fifty-six. I have to go to work, but Bertha should be there once you are both done. She’ll take you to get clothes.” He waltzed up the stairs and around the circle walkway, “See ya later,” he grabbed the railing, the floor slid away from the wall and shot upward.
Colin grabbed the railing of the walkway, fifty-six, He broke from the wall and watched the grey stone blur by along with other people on lifts. He slowed and then with a slight thud reattached to the wall on the fifty-sixth floor. Colin walked around the path to the mouth of the corridor, now where do I go?
“Crud…” he set off, looking for a person to ask directions in the desolate halls. There were no signs, nor a map of the floor. “How am I supposed to find the place?” He paced around the halls, walking up one corridor and then around a corner to another. After five minutes of wandering, panic was setting in.
He wanted to call out, but not knowing who or what might be behind the doors around him he continued his search. There has to be a map or a sign. How can there not be directions in this place!?
“Colin!”
He spun around to se Jason bustling toward him. “Thank Goodness! Do you know where the testing room is?”
“Yeah, after you didn’t show up, mom told me to come looking for you. I can’t believe that Luke fellow didn’t give you directions.” They headed back up the hall, Jason leading the way.
“I know, he tells me everything else.” Colin wasn’t too far off, he had already passed the testing room a few moments ago and felt silly for not seeing the silver plaque that said: Testing Center.
Bertha and another woman were already sitting inside the rather vacant room. “If he’s going to be your guardian he could at least make sure you get here on time,” Bertha said in a stern motherly voice.
“Give it a rest Bertha,” said the other woman, her kind voice rang with a Scottish background. “I’m Isabella, I’ll be giving your test this morning. I hope you’ve both eaten a good breakfast, this can take a while.” She led them to two lone desks on the far side of the room, each with a rather thick green folder on it. “First I’ll be checking your mental capacity with this little intelligence test. Just do your best.”
Colin sat down and started reading the test. Multiply twenty-five by eight and then divide that by four. I never was good a math… He started writing; counting in his head to make sure he got it right before going on. An hour passed, then two until Colin reached the last question, number two hundred. He answered it quickly; barely aware of what he was writing.
“Very good, I got a few snacks for you while I submit these, When I get back we’ll start testing your abilities.” She held the folders under her arms and walked briskly from the room, her lilac robe swishing at her feet. Jason dove for the small morsels of food, causing him mother to smack him.
“I didn’t raise a pig!”
“I’m starving, though!” Jason pleaded, mouth full.
“So are many other people and they manage to retain their manners.” With eyes rolling he swallowed the food and continued slowly. Colin ate a few bites, but wasn’t all that hungry.
“Back,” said Isabella her boyish form bouncing back into the room. She blew at a lock of her black hair, trying to clear her vision. “Your results are very promising, well above the academic standard. It tends to be like that when students come from the surface.” She handed them each a sheet of paper inked with graphs and various numbers. Bertha took them and filed them into her large bag while Isabella set up for the next part of the test.
“I hope this isn’t as bad as that was,” Jason muttered to Colin as they took their positions.
“This is going to see what abilities you are able to use, so we can set up your tutoring and school lessons.” Isabella took of her robe and rolled up her sleeves, pulling her hair into a short ponytail. “As Psionics, our abilities are directly linked to our emotions. This is the key to controlling your powers, controlling your emotions. No everyone is different and not everyone can control every power we know of.
“Everyone has the power of telekinesis, telepathy and levitation. These three general powers are the stepping-stones to your elemental powers. Fire for example, uses telepathy to generate a signal to your cells, which then generate the energy to create the fire. Then telekinesis pulls that energy into the state of flame.” She reached out a rather dry hand, palm facing upwards.
Colin watched intently as a red aura pulsed from her shoulder to her palm, a ball of fire shimmered to life, moving constantly to maintain the orb like shape. With a tiny flick of her small wrist the flames were gone.
“Fire is attributed with anger. You must concentrate on something or someone who makes or has mad you angry. Then allow it to fill you up and channel it, control it.”
Colin held out his hand nervously, running through his brains for a memory. There she was, sleek black hair, cold black stare and her void voice. Mother…Cassandra. He felt the surge, the rushing heat pouring through his body. He let it swallow him, let the anger inhabit every corner of his being before permitting the fire to take shape. A slight bang split from his palm as a bright, spiraling flame came to life. Colin could feel the heat, but there was no pain, just a slight tingling.
“Oh my…” Isabella stared into the flames curiously, “That must be a very powerful emotion, it seems like you are definitely a Flarist.” Colin blocked the image of Cassandra and let the fire die away while Jason tried again and again, but no flame would occur in his hand.
“I guess I can’t do it,” he muttered, looking at the floor.
“Not everyone can, we are all set up differently. Now, let’s try for water; it requires the utmost calm. Try visualizing or thinking of a particular time when you felt serene.”
Calm? Colin thought, how am I supposed to be calm at a time like this? I can barely keep myself from throwing up. He tried to put everything out of his mind and let the emptiness cradle him. He visualized the ocean; the sweet salty air brushing his face, the rushing water licking his feet while the birds called from over head. As the ocean over took him a small sphere of perfectly clear water spun into life. Jason’s hand filled with a sphere of water as well, only it was a dark shade of blue.
“Why are they different colours?” Colin asked.
“It depends on how strong and pure your serenity is. Jason’s is just a little distracted.” She looked at him warningly; what ever he was thinking about left his mind at once. Colin let his water vanish as well, eager to try the next ability. She showed them wind, Jason created a swirl with ease, but Colin was unable to. She showed them the power of earth, controlling plant life and stone. Again, Jason had no problems and Colin had no effect on the flower or pot of dirt.
“The last elemental we know of is lightning, it is a relatively simple one, as your body creates electricity anyway. The ability to control it is the question, Jealousy is the emotion linked with lightning, give it a try.” Colin suddenly realized how he had struck the stereo that night, he hated to admit it, but he was jealous of Mark. It was hard for him to accept his own feelings on the situation, difficult to sea Alice kissing him and even more difficult to let that feeling fill him and generate a ring of streaking electricity.
“I can’t do that on either,” groaned Jason, “It looks so cool too.”
Colin sighed and let the ring dissipate. If you only knew…
“Both of you have done well. I will be preparing your lessons after this. I don’t want either of you trying to do anything by yourselves; we’ve had a number of incidents with untrained children causing some rather problematic situations.”
“Yes ma’am,” they chimed together, Colin’s heart ached a moment, he forced it away, not wanting to be caught up in his emotions.
“After a while you’ll start learning how to mold and shape your powers as you need them. I look forward to seeing you in class.” Isabella tucked a sheet of paper into her robe after slipping it back on.
“In class?” asked Jason.
“I am the instructor at the school for ability training. Call me Mrs. McDaniel.” She trotted from the room, leaving Colin and Jason with Bertha, who had been silent since they started.
“I can’t believe I didn’t realize you had any abilities,” she said as they walked through the halls, “it was staring me in the face, yet I missed it.”
“It’s not a big deal, we hid it pretty well,” Jason said trying to reassure his mother.
“Next we have to go get you boys some clothes. Luke gave me credits and I already got the presets this morning for you Jason. We’ll have you boys in some nice clothes in no time.” Bertha waddled along in front of Colin and her son, humming to her self.
“I had the oddest dream last night,” Colin said low, so Bertha wouldn’t hear.
“I should think so, this whole situations is pretty odd.”
“This is different, it’s so much more real. I keep going to this white room and seeing my memories. It’s just weird.”
‘Sounds like a recurring nightmare to me.” Jason didn’t take the interest Colin had hoped for. He needed someone to talk to, someone he knew. Of course, that only left Bertha and she would tell someone.
I guess I shouldn’t worry about it. It’s only a dream after all. |
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| Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 9:45 am Post subject: |
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OMG Adam, I think I'm developing a strong liking for this story. This chapter rocked!!
The way you wrote this chapter, it kept me reading. The descriptions...so elegant and it flowed so gracefully.
The ideas in this...amazing! You gave us more insight on the magic system in Atlantis as well as how things work. It was very creative and I noticed that despite having benefits, there were also draw backs or restrictions to the magic/technology in Atlantis making things quite believable and realistic even for fantasy.
I was most impressed with how spells work. It is quite original that you used emotion itself to restrict spell casting. I believe it works very well and really helps prevent characters from being overpowered.
Overall, this kicked major butt! I am sold! I want the next chapter ASAP |
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| Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 5:47 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
| She ran up the muddy hill with the bag of mallets they used in her hand. |
"used in" makes this sentence super clunky--almost difficult to understand. It makes sense, but in another sense it doesn't. Just look at "they used in her hands". doesn't really make sense, huh? maybe if you said "bag of mallets that they used"
Using their full names in the first couple dialogue tags is so info dumping and thick to read. XD Also, to non band people, I have no idea what a marimba is. You might want to add a random description so that we know.
| Quote: |
| He had a ride in tomorrow anyway, and who in their right mind would steal a cruddy little scooter? |
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| “What have I done!” cried the man who had hit the car. He stood transfixed, unable to do anything but cry and shake in the storm. A woman rubbed her head from the driver’s seat of the second car. She was dazed, unable to think straight. |
I don't think the guy would have gotten out that quick--they would both be very dazed/stunned. I was very OMG after my crash. I think they'd be in a horrid condition, considering the speed the man was probably going--a bit more than dazed for the woman...*shrugs* I dunno.
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| She couldn’t have been more than ten, face drenched in on pouring blood, face white. |
What...? I don't like the "face white" part. It's too expected. Give us something brutal! Not the regular pale face and blood. does she have glass in her face...?
| Quote: |
| He pulled on the handle, hoping for it open, again he pulled. |
Ech! "He pulled on the handle. When it wouldn't open, he tried again--but still it wouldn't open." Just... anything besides what you have? It's really really weird, and "again he pulled" sounds SO weird because of the verb-subject oddity.
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Colour returned to her stark white face. She didn’t cough or gurgle, but breathing resumed. |
I think you should be less technical. don't say "Breathing resumed" say "she was alive" or something--be more human-compassionate-emotional rather than technical, you know?
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| People cheered when the girl made a noise. |
wait... there are people there? You're going to want to consider this. It's the whole show us a gun before someone gets shot thing--tell us about the crowds before they start to cheer. (And if you did, I missed it, and it wasn't a big enough comment XD)
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| “Go now,” Colin whispered as he grabbed Alice’s arm. She seemed a little affronted by it but with a look at Colin’s face went along. |
"Go now" sounds weird. Let's go now?
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| she whispered as Colin made to get out. |
Ach. Change "made to get out" to "got out".
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| said Colin’s mother when her opened the door, |
typo!
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“You keep saying that yet you constantly wait around for me. I’m sixteen, I don’t need you to hold my hand.” Her black eyes glinted with malice, ready to tell Colin off for back talking.
“What is wrong with your eyes!”
“What are you on about?” She made a grab and took Colin’s head in her hand, glaring into his eyes. “What is wrong with you?” With wide eyes she let go of him.
“Go to your room,” she swung around to the phone, long black hair hiding the number she dialed, “I told you to get your ass upstairs!” |
The actions here are weird--I can't understand them in a real life sense. What is happening...?
| Quote: |
| The computer in the corner was Colin needed |
your sentences are all weird and backwards! Why not 'Colin needed the computer' or something...?
Eh--I can't finish quite yet. Sleepy, ya know?
What I can say so far is that it is very interesting! But at some points, a bit childish and sort of odd. The phone conversation with his mom and someone else makes me feel like you are rushing the story--It's all too weird too quickly, you know? And then him hiding under the bed... he's sixteen. Why is he afraid of an unknown AC guy? Sure, he might be someone else! But you didn't show his fear to the point that I can think, "Oh no! Hide under your bed, Colin! Someone is coming for you!" in fact, I saw no fear at all! I think you sort of rushed the story with the phone conversation thing--up until then it was really good.
I'll have to read more tomorrow  |
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| Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 5:26 am Post subject: Chapter 9 WC: 2666 |
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Chapter 9
Missing You
Colin pulled the tan kakis over his knees and up to his waist, checking the length in the full-length mirror. He held to one side of the tiny fitting room as he pulled them off, accepting them as acceptable.
“I have more clothes for you two to try on,” Bertha said, knocking on Colin’s door. Jason let out a soft groan from the room beside him. “I heard that.”
“Mom!” Jason barked as his mother opened the dressing room door, “I’m not decent, jeez!”
“Please, I’m your mother, I’ve seen you far less decent than this.” She flung a few clothes over the thin plywood wall for Colin, who was desperate to not let his laughs escape his mouth.
Arms heavy with clothes, the small group left the clothing store. People bustled all around them, most with bags dangling from their hands. A few had on sweeping robes of varying color, while the majority were clad in street clothes. They followed along in the throng of people until Bertha steered them into another shop.
“What do we need from here?” Colin asked, looking at some interesting rolls of fabric.
“You need grey cloaks for school, I thought we would go ahead and get them fitted for you. This is one of the best robe and cloak shops in Atlantis.” She walked up to the counter and dinged a small bell.
“Coming,” came a sweetly crisp voice. There was a fair bit of rustling and banging before the curtain flung open. A small plump woman stood open mouthed in the doorway to the backroom, blue eyes bulging in shock. Her long red fingernails scratched at the paint on the walls, hundreds of thoughts flittering across her eyes.
“Hello, Henrietta,” Bertha said, trying to avoid eye contact. Colin glanced at Jason who looked as perplexed as Colin.
“C-can this be? A-are you really and truly back?” tears were melting down her puffy peach cheeks.
“I’ve missed you so much, sister!” They ran at each other, bypassing the counter and embracing tightly. “I wanted to write you so many times, to tell you about my children, but could never find the words.”
“I’ve wished for you to come back for so many nights, praying to those illusions.” Henrietta wiped the tears from her sister’s eyes, as Bertha stroked her sister’s curly black hair. “Is that, Jason?” she pulled away from Bertha, advancing on Jason.
“Yes, he’s grown up since you last saw him.”
“But, where is Jared?” They met eyes, understanding creeping over Henrietta’s face with a look of disbelief, “Surely not, oh my poor child.” Bertha crumpled, her loud sobs drawing the attention of those on the street. Colin felt the guilt form a lump in his chest while she wept.
Jason did not hold himself in this time; he went to his mother, permitting his tears to drop freely. “You do not have to be strong today, Bertha,” consoled Henrietta, “You don’t have to be strong today.”
Colin stared at the floor, lost in his own thoughts, trying to block Bertha’s sounds of pain. He would do anything to relieve her of the agony, as he was sure, anyone else would do. I should have let them take me…I should have saved him…
She regained a small bit of her composure, enough to waddle into the backroom where her sister poured cups of tea and set out a few cakes. Colin leaned against a wall, separating himself from the reunion. It felt awkward to be happy anymore. All he seemed able to do was look back and regret.
“You never told us you had a sister,” Jason choked.
“I tried to sever all of my connections from this place, trying to protect my family,” Bertha said.
“You cant keep blaming Atlantis for what happened to Henry, I thought you would have accepted it after all this time, “Henrietta was pulling fabrics off of rolls, pinning them in various places.
“We can’t all just accept death, it keeps ripping apart my family.”
“Death has not touched your family! A group of ill hearted, foul demons have done this to us. Death only does its job, people kill people.” She stuck herself in the finger, trying to divert her anger into something else. “Ouch!” Bertha became silent and continued to sip tea.
I wish I knew what to do…Colin wandered the store, trying to keep distance from the others. He ran his hand across a particularly soft blue fabric while looking out of the shop window. Watching the people, deep in their own lives, unaware of the pain being felt just inside. Of course, everyone here is supposed to be psychic, so maybe they do know it.
“Come along, I need to get you fitted,” Henrietta placed a soft hand near Colin’s shoulder; she couldn’t quite reach that high. He followed her towards a large mirror in the back of the store. It reflected the wooden stool and anything else that wandered before it, showing the exact copies.
Colin got on the stool, looking at himself; staring back was not the person he had last seen in a mirror. His eyes glinted with new colour. One held the bright warmth of pink; the other contained the swimming blue of the ocean. A large piece of grey fabric landed over Colin’s head. Henrietta moved around him quickly, pinning certain places, measuring with a small yellow measuring tape.
“That looks very nice. I should have it finished by the end of the day and have it sent through one of the couriers.”
“Thank you,” Colin said stepping down from the stool. She took the grey fabric and led him back to Bertha and Jason. After a few hugs they made their way back into the bustling sidewalk.
They went to the office supply store next, retrieving a very large and very heavy bag of things they needed for school. Afterwards Bertha took them to a Barber for a suitable haircut.
“I don’t care,” she said to a protesting Jason, “You are not going to start school looking like that, now sit down.”
“I like my hair the way it is,” he muttered.
“If you keep talking I’ll do it myself.” Colin didn’t say anything, but he thought his hair was fine the way it was. With Bertha as a mother figure it didn’t really matter what you thought of your appearance because she was always right.
“Don’t you boys feel better now? You’re both so handsome.”
“Thanks mom, I’m sure the next girl I meet will be so pleased you thought I looked smashing.”
“You don’t hear Colin complaining.”
“I haven’t heard Colin talk all day!”
“Well it’s cut now, so deal with it!” she stormed off ahead of them, climbing onto the bus.
“Such a drama queen,” Jason said lugging the shopping bags onto the bus, “You’ll get to see our apartment now. It’s kinda small, but I guess since there are only two of us it’ll work.”
Colin sat in a seat behind Bertha, Jason beside him. All their goods were piled in the seat next to a fuming Bertha. The bus lifted off the ground and joined the vein moving through the city.
“What side of the City are you in?” Jason asked.
“East I think,” Colin said.
“We’re near the park. I’ve been looking over some of the information they gave us in the registration office; did you know we’re under water?”
“No.”
“Yeah, the little pamphlet said ‘Atlantis is submerged under the ocean.’ Never specified which one, probably wanting to keep it a secret. They use some kind of energy barrier to push the water back and keep the city dry.”
“Fascinating…” Colin stared at the buildings passing by his window. It really was interesting, but he felt no desire to hear more explanations.
“Are you okay? You’ve been really quiet all day.”
“Just thinking.”
“About?”
“It’s nothing.”
“If it was nothing you wouldn’t be thinking about it.”
“I don’t know, I guess I’m just kinda sad.”
“We’re all a little sad, but we’re pushing through it.”
“It’s not your fault,” Bertha said, not turning around to face them, “It is not your fault what happened.” Colin didn’t say anything. He wondered if it as because she was a mother or if she had been inside his mind. The rest of the bus ride was silent, a gloomy sort of silence that Colin couldn’t help but blame on himself.
“Here we are,” Bertha said, distributing the shopping bags to Colin and Jason. They dragged from the bus under the weight of the items. The shiny metal building gleamed in the artificial sunlight. Darkened windows offering distorted reflections of their surroundings.
She checked the small metal box on the first floor for mail; Jason’s schedule was inside. “Looks kinda thick,” Jason said.
“It has the information for your private lessons as well.” Bertha mashed the elevator button; the doors slid open to a dull grey walled compartment. She hit another button and with closed doors the started to ascend.
“We’re on floor five,” Jason told Colin, “You can come by anytime.”
“Thanks.”
“I want you two to separate the supplies and get your backpacks ready for school. It looks like you’ll be starting tomorrow,” Bertha said as she opened the door to her apartment. The heavy smell of cooking meat escaped into the hall, drawing Colin and Jason into the apartment.
“What are you cooking, mom?”
“It’s just a roast, well a synthetic one anyway. I expect it should taste just the same. I would have preferred fresh, but cant always have things your way.”
“The synthetic food tastes pretty good,” Colin said opening a shopping bag and pulling out his new blue school bag. “I had some this morning, it tasted just like real eggs.”
“I just hope it cooks the same as real food.” Jason took a seat on the rather old looking wood framed couch. It had three ornate cushions for seats and then three more to line the back. He started going through the bags as well, opening up his backpack to see how much space he had.
An hour passed by quickly, Colin and Jason were organizing their things. Jason talked, while Colin only responded when he had to. He was starting to crave the solitude of his room.
“Luke should be by soon,” Bertha said, “Maybe you two could stay for dinner. There’s plenty for all of us.”
I don’t want to stay and have dinner. “That sounds great.” A knock issued from the door.
“Speaking of,” Bertha crossed to the door and opened it; Luke and Sabrina were standing in the doorway. “Hello, Would you like to stay for dinner?” She sounded unsure now, Sabrina’s appearance must have made her rethink the amount of food she had.
“It smells great, but we really should be getting home,” Luke said looking at Colin, “I’m sure Colin would like to get some rest before he has to start classes.”
“Oh, alright.” Colin hoisted his bag onto his shoulder, waving good-bye to Jason he passed through the door into the hall, “Do come by and see me.”
“Will do, night.” She shut the door, the lock clinking at once.
“Lucky for you,” Sabrina said nudging Colin, “Bertha is a little rusty with her abilities.”
“What do you mean?” Colin asked.
“You can’t go thinking to yourself without the proper precautions around here. We need to show you some shelling techniques so your thoughts don’t go flying around the place.”
“You heard me?”
“We both did, otherwise we would have stayed.”
“I just want to go home.” Colin leaned against the elevator wall as they descended.
“Are you okay?” Luke asked.
“Fine, just tired.” It was an easy excuse, something less likely to be questioned as long as Colin didn’t think about it and give himself away. After a few more seconds of elevator they were leaving the building and climbing into a small half egg shaped vehicle. “What is this?”
“My car,” Sabrina said, sliding her door shut.
“Car?”
“Surely you’ve noticed we don’t use wheels anymore.”
“Yeah, it’s just a different design I guess.” The shimmering blue car rose upward from the ground, higher than the buses ever had, before joining a pulsating path of other various vehicles.
Colin gripped the seat as they zoomed in between other cars. He gripped it even tighter when the other vehicles were flying around them. Seeing the passengers go by, mere inches from Colin’s window was almost more than he could bear.
“Relax,” Luke said, “It’s totally safe. They’re engineered with sensors so they cant more than five inches from each other.”
“How…comforting.” Sabrina broke from the main flux and headed down a side street with a few others. Soon they were lowering to the ground, Colin was glad to put his feet on it.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Sabrina said. She waved from her front seat as she floated upward again.
“I wonder if my schedule is in the mailbox.” Colin entered the building, waiting for Luke to open the small metal box.
“I’m sure it is. They wanted to get you started as soon as possible since you’re both so far behind.” Luke inserted his small silver key into the box and opened it. There was a large manila envelope sitting inside, very different from Jason’s. “It’s addressed to you.” Colin took it tentatively.
Why is it in this big envelope?
“We’ll look it over upstairs.” Luke shut the box and they went to the apartment. Colin felt a little excited; he wanted to know what was in the envelope, even if it was just his classes.
They sat on the couch; Colin peeled the flap back carefully and slid the pages from their manila prison. The first page was indeed his schedule. It was marked with several classes he would be taking and on the bottom was a handwritten note:
Colin,
You will be attending private lessons with Jason every evening at 5:00 P.M. on the fifty-sixth floor of the Tower.
Mrs. McDaniel
Then he flipped to the next page, his mouth feel open. It was his parents Will. “There must be a mistake, shouldn’t this have been sorted out already?” Luke looked over the papers, as shocked as Colin.
“They left you a book?” Luke said, “Why didn’t they go over this before now?”
“A book? A book has gotten me ten pages of paper work?”
“It looks like it. This is very odd; though we cant do anything about it now. It’s too late in the day. I’ll make us something to eat. You can put all this in your room for tomorrow.”
“Right, mind if I read it over?”
“No, go crazy.” Luke went to the pantry and started riffling while Colin retreated to his room. He looked over each page, trying to find something important or interesting about his parents. It was like looking at a cryptograph.
This is getting me now where…I wish Alice were here. She was always good with these fancy worded documents. I wonder how she’s doing…
Colin thumped the papers on his desk, disgusted at his inability to understand them. After a quick bite and change of clothes he was lying in his dark room, waiting for sleep. It resisted as his mind raced from image to image.
First it was Jared dead on the asphalt, and then it was Alice screaming. He filtered through them, over and over, wetting his pillow in quiet sorrow. After thirty minutes he drifted into the White Room.
It burst into a football field filled with people. About forty, lined up with shiny instruments ready to be played. Colin could see himself standing at the Marimba, soft yarn mallets ready to strike the hard wooden keys. Standing beside him was Alice. The scene was frozen; Colin sat on the ground, looking at her. Wondering what she might be doing.
I miss you… |
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| Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:37 am Post subject: |
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Well I've already talked to you on what I've thought of this chapter so I'll summarize it here.
Basically, I can understand on why you were showing on how life has changed since he moved to Atlantis. It's described well and shows another aspect of the society of Atlantis.
However, it doesn't really drive the plot forward and sends the story into a stand still.
What's the point of having inner conflicts when they are not used?
Nevertheless, despite the boringness of the chapter, it was good overall. But you need to stop focusing on the society of Atlantis and to move the plot of the novel. |
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| Posted: Mon Sep 24, 2007 12:49 am Post subject: |
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It's not exactly 1666, because modding comes first, but it's pretty close!
Anyway, here it is. And, halfway through recording, I realized that you had dial-up so... hopefully it won't bug you too much to download the files. I cut down the files as much as I could, so hopefully that will help, but yeah...
Also, this is only the first chapter. Yep...
Anyway! The files!
http://snoink.com/me/voice/writing/adam1.mp3
First section. 6.2 MB. 10:47 minutes.
http://snoink.com/me/voice/writing/adam2.mp3
Second section. 16.6 MB. 28:50 minutes.
http://snoink.com/me/voice/writing/adam3.mp3
Third (final) section. 6.1 MB. 10:36 minutes.
http://snoink.com/me/voice/writing/adam4.mp3
Conclusion. 4.8 MB. 8:21 minutes.
*Courtesy of SPEW* |
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| Posted: Sun Nov 04, 2007 7:49 am Post subject: Chapter 10 WC: 2,450 |
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Chapter 10
Foul
The sharp beeps of the alarm clock were a disappointing jerk back to reality. Colin smacked the top button to silence the disruption. School…Not much of an adjustment period. He pushed the comfortable sheets away and allowed himself to be exposed to the chilly morning air.
With weary eyes and unruly hair, Colin ventured to the kitchen. Nothing was cooking, but a few boxes of what could only be cereal were side by side on the counter. A small note had been placed on the table, Colin’s name was written on it.
Sorry I can’t see you off to school. We had an emergency and I had to go. Sabrina will be by to take you, See you soon.
Luke
“On my own yet again,” he mumbled, searching the cabinets for bowls. Then he found silverware and made himself a bowl of cereal. It tasted a bit odd, a little dry as well, but Colin didn’t really care. He busied himself with cleaning up, going over his school supplies again and again and checking his schedule at least ten times. He had to keep his mind focused; all he wanted was to not think about Alice or Jared for a day.
A strong but tender rapping at the door told Colin Sabrina had arrived. With a last second check, he opened the door. There was no Sabrina.
“Umm, Hi,” Colin said, trying to not cower in the massive man’s shadow. His pale green skin glistened in the fluorescent lighting.
“I have come seeking Lucas Banks,” his voice pounded down the hall, Colin’s insides quivered.
“H-he’s not here right now. He left and note and said he had an emergency.”
“I see, you are Colin Banks then?”
“Yes, s-sir.” the man bent forward, navy dreadlocks framing his boldly defined face. He looked deep into Colin’s eyes, His light green eyes slicing into Colin.
“Indeed you are,” he stood straight again, “I shall come at another time then. I bid you farewell, young Banks.”
“If y-you w-w-want I can talk a message.”
“Inform him, Poseidon came to discuss the documents.” He turned on his heel, arms held firmly behind his back and walked. His long legs carried him to the elevator in four strides, deep rippling blue robe trailing behind him.
Sabrina appeared at the far end of the hall, Colin was still staring after Poseidon. “What are you looking at?” she asked.
“This guy came to see Luke, he said his name was Poseidon.”
“Poseidon! No Way! Why would an Elder come here, they usually stayed all stowed up in the top of the tower?”
“He said something about discussing the documents, I wonder if he’s talking about the will?”
“More than likely, come on, you don’t want to be late. Some of those teachers can be…well merciless.”
“Sounds great,” they took the elevator down, feeling the force push up when it stopped. “Can you tell me more about these Elders?”
“Well, they make the big decisions about Atlantis. They founded the city and built the Tower themselves. Other than that no one seems to know much. At least no one says anything.”
“Then why do you keep following them? They keep you guys in the dark, no information or anything. They could be planning world domination up there.”
“Get in the car,” Sabrina said, pushing Colin’s head down into the seat, “And stop inciting revolutions.” she slid into the driver side. “They do a good job, we’ve had almost no problems with them. The only issue the city has ever really had is security.”
Sabrina clicked on her dashboard, entering a sequence of commands on her control panel. The car rose high into the sky before filtering into the skyway. It seemed a little less frightening this time. Colin was engrossed with to many emotions to worry over his transportation.
Could it really be him? A real life Greek god? And he wants to talk to Luke. The curiosity of it all was eating at Colin’s mind, distorting his thoughts. Sabrina set the car down in front of a large green lawn. Colin glanced at the randomly aged students traversing the sidewalk. I hope I find Jason soon.
“Luke is going to try and pick you up, hopefully he’ll be able to.” Sabrina wished Colin luck as he slid the door shut. With a swift dive into his pocket, Colin looked over his schedule. Even after the hundredth time he still couldn’t remember where homeroom was. Building B, room 215. This shouldn’t be too hard. As he looked up, the large dark green letter B beckoned Colin to his first class.
He made his way slowly at first, scanning the crowds for any sign of the only person he knew. There were a few looks, nothing really out of the ordinary, save the students practicing their powers. For these moments Colin stopped and stared. Seeing others use their abilities openly, freely without fear, gave him a small boost of hope.
A grassy courtyard held the majority of the waiting students between the four white buildings. The outer rim Colin traveled kept fairly empty as he walked to the glass double doors that led inside the B Building. It was quiet inside. There were no students, only their muffled voices from the courtyard. He looked at the schedule again and went to the elevator.
“What do you think you’re doing?” came a crisp deadly voice. Colin turned, facing the withered man across from him. “Students are not allowed into the buildings before classes begin.
“I’m sorry; I just started today and…”
“You think you can just be above with the rules, do you?”
“No sir, I just…” A small pamphlet flew from the corner of the room, missing Colin by millimeters.
“Those are the rules of the school, read them, live them and obey them.” The old man rolled back the sleeves of his grey sweater, showing a number of healed wounds. His stark blue eyes drilled into Colin’s mind.
“Um, I think I’ll just go wait outside.” Colin plucked the rules from the air and headed back to the doors.
“A wise decision, Mr. Banks.” with a quickened pace, Colin was outside again. Within seconds a deep chime hurdled across the courtyard, the small clock tower in the center vibrating with its clanging bell.
The crowd caught Colin, forcing him inside the building and into an elevator. Pulled along with the other students, he found himself halfway down a hall on the second floor. The polished oak doors gleamed with the reflections of fluorescent lights. He read the numbers, trying to find the room.
“Colin!” Jason was holding a door open down the hall, the bronze numbers read: B215.
“Thank goodness,” Colin sighed following his friend into the classroom.
“Welcome to Junior History Class,” Colin’s mouth nearly dropped, it was the old man he had met just minutes before. “You seem to have the room alright,” he smirked. “I am Mr. Hendry, if you two would open your books to page five hundred and ninety six, we will be studying the rise of Christianity this chapter.”
The class seemed to drag on and on, Mr. Hendry’s either liked Colin or hated him because he continuously called on him. It was like watching a war, each side landing a few shots. Sometimes Colin knew the answer, but most of the time he was totally lost.
Just a few more minutes, a few more, Colin thought, hoping he wouldn’t be asked another question.
“Tell me, Mr. Banks, What was the key difference in Christianity and Classicism?”
“God, the two sides had a lot of differences, but classicism didn’t look to a higher being, they believed that the human rational thought could understand everything. Christianity held God above all else and without him there was nothing.”
“Nicely said,” A faint sliver of a smile cracked the hard surface of the man’s face, allowing Colin to presume that Mr. Hendry liked him. “Be sure and read the book and answer the questions before Monday.” A stack of white papers flew around the room, most likely controlled by the teacher, and gave everyone a copy of the questions.
“That wasn’t so bad,” Jason said stuffing the papers into his backpack.
“Speak for your self,” Colin rubbed the massive headache he had attained while in class. “That was brutal, what do we have next?”
“Algebra. How depressing.”
“It couldn’t be worse than history.” Colin’s center of balance was destroyed when a long slender object collided with his shins. The floor grew closer until his face smacked into it. Laughter chorused from behind, a tall boy stood over Colin, laughing with the rest.
“Have a nice trip?” he scoffed, invoking more laughter and knee slapping with his thick French accent. Colin lifted himself up, seeing the blur of Jason’s fist collide with the boy’s face. He fell back into the laughing group.
“See you next fall,” Jason snarled.
“How dare you touch me, filthy American.” the feeling came first, anger was flowing out of the boy, then there was a bright red blaze before Jason was set a flame.
“Jason!” Colin clambered to his feet, trying to calm himself, to use his powers. A stream of water shot out of the crowd and dosed Jason before the fire could spread. Pain blistered Colin’s body as he was held against the wall by an unseen force.
“What is going on here?” Isabella split the crowd with her voice and released the three boys. “Lamont, I should have figured you were involved.” She eyed Jason and Colin as they rubbed the soreness from their heads. “Follow me, all of you.”
Dread settled in Colin’s stomach as they were led further and further from the B building and into the A building. Up the stairs to the third landing and down the seemingly infinite hallway. With a stern look they were ushered them into a fair sized office. The numerous shelves of dusty books caused Colin to sneeze, filling his sinus cavities.
“Lamont, You’ve already been in trouble for fighting, I don’t think your parents are going to be happy to hear you have been suspended.” Isabella said from her comfy high-backed chair.
“If it gets me away from zis scum, I gladly accept.” Lamont spat at Colin.
“That is enough!” She was on her feet, rage filling her every particle. “Get out of my office. I will notify your parents to come retrieve you.” He stuck his nose as high into the air as possible without falling backwards and left the room with an air of dignity he had lost a few minutes ago.
Colin wanted to smile, but was sure if he did his punishment would be very painful. He racked his mind for excuses, reasonings and anything else he could use to defend himself and Jason from Isabella’s flaming wrath.
“I’m very sorry about that, Lamont still holds to his indoctrinated beliefs from childhood.” she had become softer now, like she had been the first time Colin met her. “I have to punish you Jason for fighting, but Colin you’re free to go.
“But he was only trying to help me, please…” Colin started but was cut off at once.
“Unless you want to join him of course?”
“It’s fine Colin,” Jason said, “I’ve be | |
