Topic ID: 18064
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Quill
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 Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:05 pm Post subject: Closets (title soon to change) |
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Beginning Note: First off, the characters mentioned in this script are not fictional. The plot, though, is fictional. So no worrying, k? ^_~ Enjoy!
Setting: The YWS lounge at 11:33am. The only people on are Shane and Syd (Aquarius Angel and Quill)
Final note: Alexis = Chili Peppa
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Aquarius Angel: no
Quill: plz?
Aquarius Angel: no
Quill: plz??
Aquarius Angel: NO!
Quill: SYYYYYD!! Please??????????????
Aquarius Angel: SHAAANE!! No!!!!!!!!!
Quill cries in a corner.
Aquarius Angel: No. I’m waiting for Mark to get on so I can ask him something.
Quill: =O
Quill: Uncool!
[The Lounge: Skell has entered at 11:35]
Quill: =O
Quill: ‘s like a dream come true, ain’t it syddy?
Aquarius Angel: oh shut up
Aquarius Angel: hi mark
Skell: hey syd
Quill: aaaaaaaaask
Quill: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[The Lounge: Claudette has entered at 11:37]
Claudette: Quill, stop spamming.
[The Lounge: Claudette has left at 11:37]
Aquarius Angel: O_O
Aquarius Angel: Wow. She’s good.
Skell: lol
Skell: ask me waht
Skell: what
Aquarius Angel: ahem. *clears throat*
Aquarius Angel: who is better? Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck?
Quill: …
Aquarius Angel: 
Quill: …
Skell: lol umm
Skell: mickey?
Quill: …
Quill: you’ve waited thirty minutes… to ask him about some DISNEY CHARACTER?????????
Quill glares
Aquarius Angel: yup yup yup!
Quill: whatever. Well since u asked him, now will u do it?
Skell: do what?
Aquarius Angel: *sigh* He wants me to bite him because alexis did, and now he’s “infected”. my bite will “heal” him.
Skell: umm
Aquarius Angel: yeah. exactly.
Quill: lol do it!
Quill extends his arm.
Aquarius Angel: no!
[The Lounge: Mattster has entered at 12:21]
Mattster: Moo =)
Aquarius Angel: You’ll live, man, just go away!!
Mattster: Moo =(
[The Lounge: Mattster has left at 12:21]
Skell: lol
Aquarius Angel: oops. I didn’t mean him!! *megaphone* COME BACK, MATT!!!!!!!
Quill: XD
Quill: evil. Just……………………… evil
Aquarius Angel: =(
[The Lounge: Claudette has entered at 12:26]
Claudette: Quill, stop abusing the ellipses.
[The Lounge: Claudette has left at 12:26]
[The Lounge: Skell has left at 12:26]
Aquarius Angel: LOL how does she know this stuff???
Aquarius Angel: =O
Aquarius Angel: he left =(
Aquarius Angel cries
Quill: lol she’s a mod. She gets magic by default.
[The Lounge: Skell has entered at 12:30]
Skell: sorry. it kicked me out
Aquarius Angel tackle hugs mark
Aquarius Angel: Well I forbid it from ever happening again.
Skell: lol ok
…
…
…
…
Quill shoots the silence
Quill: actually I’m gonna go. Bye
Aquarius Angel: cya
Skell: bye
[The Lounge: Quill has left at 12:35]
Aquarius Angel: he’s weird
Aquarius Angel: it scares me
Skell: yeah
Skell: was that really what you wanted to ask me?
Aquarius Angel: no. I didn’t want to ask you anything
Aquarius Angel: just making excuses so he would stop asking me to bite him. *pinches you* you weren’t suppose to come on! Gosh, you can’t stall! couldn’t you have saved some cat from a tree or something before deciding to come on?? Jog around the city? *snaps* you coulda went to the moon, ya know. Anything to waste time!
Skell: lol
Skell: sorry
Skell: *pinches back* and don’t pinch me
Aquarius Angel: lol
Skell: hmm. i’m surprised Matt hasn’t come back yet
Aquarius Angel: *shrugs* he’s probably upgrading his udder.
There’s a new Super Ultra Milker 3000.01 out now.
Skell: lol yeah
Skell: so syd
Skell: how are you?
Aquarius Angel: bored and hungry. you?
Skell: pretty good but I have this pain in my leg that just won’t fo ayaw
Aquarius Angel: that won’t what?
Skell: oops. not fo ayaw
[The Lounge: Mattster has entered at 12:51]
Skell: go away
Mattster: =O
Mattster: Well fine, then!
[The Lounge: Mattster has left at 12:51]
Aquarius Angel: LOL
Aquarius Angel falls over laughing.
Skell: haha
Aquarius Angel: hehe well anywho
Aquarius Angel: I gtg. So cya later
Skell: =O
Skell: *sigh* ok. bye bye syd
Skell: *hugs* have a nice day
Aquarius Angel: *hugs back* you too. bye!
[The Lounge: Aquarius Angel has left at 12:56]
Skell: *sigh* alone
[The Lounge: Skell has left at 12:57]
LATER THAT DAY. TIME: 9:30PM U.S. (Georgia) TIME.
Setting: Syd’s kitchen. Her younger brother is the only occupant.
Brother: (dancing in front of the TV to the Digimon theme song. He had recorded it.) Digimon!
Digital Monsters!
Digimon are the champions!
Digimon!
Digital Monsters!
Digimon are the champions!
Change into Digital Champions to save the Digital World!
Digimon!
Digital Monsters!
Digimon are the champions!
Digimon!
Digital Monsters!
Digimon are the champions!
Digivolve into champions!
Armor Digivolve!
Digimon! Digital Monsters! Digimon are the champions…
[SYDNEY ENTERS]
Sydney: (sighing and rolling her eyes) Please stop singing that.
Brother: (still dancing) Why?
Sydney: 1. It’s annoying 2. You’re offbeat and 3. It’s annoying!
Brother: You know you said that twice, right?
Sydney: (picking up an apple) I like to make a point.
Brother: (shrugs and continues singing anyway)
Sydney sighs and walks away, eating her apple as she makes her way to her room. On her way there, the phone rings; she answers it and enters her bedroom.
Setting: Sydney’s bedroom. The lights are on; she is the only occupant.
Sydney: (falling on her bed) Hello?
Alexis: (on the receiver end) Hey! It’s Lexy.
Sydney: Hi. What’s up?
Alexis: Not much. How’ve you been?
Sydney: Bored. (sighing sadly) I can’t believe summer’s almost over. I’m not ready to go back to school just yet.
Alexis: Yeah. Neither am I.
Long pause.
Alexis: Anyway. The reason I called was because I have a favor to ask of you.
Sydney: And that would be…?
Alexis: (whispering) Don’t turn off your closet light. Mwahaha! (giggling) Bye
Alexis hangs up.
Sydney: ok…?
Sydney hangs up and looks at her open closet the door.
Sydney: (eating her apple) Psh. As if I’m actually sleeping with that light on!
Sydney gets up and turns her closet light off, shutting the door. She hops on her bed and turns her TV on, watching it until she is lulled to sleep. |
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-Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End) |
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Leja
Slightly more inclined to writing than previously
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:23 pm Post subject: |
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Claudette's appearances made me laugh.
Style note: I think it would be easier to read if it were less like a chat log and more like a script [since this is the scripts forum, not the other fiction forum] as most of what's written, such as time stamps and things like this:
| Quote: |
Skell: lol ok
…
…
…
…
Quill shoots the silence |
will never be heard. Come to think of it, this might go better in the "Other Fiction" section just because it's so visual and seems to lend itself more to being read than being spoken. Come to think of it [part two] it might be well placed in fan fiction even. EDIT [after I've finished reading the whole thing] Never mind, maybe scratch the fan fiction part.
Oh, the paragraph thing I was talking about before; from this:
| Quote: |
Aquarius Angel: oh shut up
Aquarius Angel: hi mark
Skell: hey syd
Quill: aaaaaaaaask
Quill: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim
[The Lounge: Claudette has entered at 11:37]
Claudette: Quill, stop spamming.
[The Lounge: Claudette has left at 11:37]
Aquarius Angel: O_O
Aquarius Angel: Wow. She’s good.
Skell: lol
Skell: ask me waht
Skell: what
Aquarius Angel: ahem. *clears throat* |
to this:
| Quote: |
Aquarius Angel: oh shut up
Aquarius Angel: hi mark
Skell: hey syd
Quill: aaaaaaaaask
Quill: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim
[The Lounge: Claudette has entered at 11:37]
Claudette: Quill, stop spamming.
[The Lounge: Claudette has left at 11:37]
Aquarius Angel: O_O
Aquarius Angel: Wow. She’s good.
Skell: lol
Skell: ask me waht
Skell: what
Aquarius Angel: ahem. *clears throat* |
might be easier to read.
Personally, I think that you went a little over the top with chat speak.
This:
| Quote: |
| Aquarius Angel: just making excuses so he would stop asking me to bite him. *pinches you* you weren’t suppose to come on! Gosh, you can’t stall! couldn’t you have saved some cat from a tree or something before deciding to come on?? Jog around the city? *snaps* you coulda went to the moon, ya know. Anything to waste time! |
was funny for the first few sentences, but you dragged the humour on for a little too long.
This was ridiculously weird:
| Quote: |
Skell: hmm. i’m surprised Matt hasn’t come back yet
Aquarius Angel: *shrugs* he’s probably upgrading his udder. There’s a new Super Ultra Milker 3000.01 out now.
Skell: lol yeah |
The end, the part with Syd that wasn't chat logged, had seemingly nothing to do with the beginning, though methinks I hear an urban ledgend making its way into the story. |
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Sexy.Lexy.Chili.Peppa
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Country: I don't remeber... Oh! But, I do know that there are grass, trees, and people there. Does that help?
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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:O I don't talk like that!!!!
kidding, kidding, kidding. yes i do *is in denial*
I liked it. Nice and humerous!  I agree with Amelia, though, some parts could use a little work. I think I may know where you're going with this...  *frightened* teehee
well cya!
~~Alexis~~ |
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*pout* You're just jealous because my lollipop has more colors in it than yours. - Aquarius Angel (sydney) |
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Lady Sydney
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
| Aquarius Angel: just making excuses so he would stop asking me to bite him. *pinches you* you weren’t suppose to come on! Gosh, you can’t stall! couldn’t you have saved some cat from a tree or something before deciding to come on?? Jog around the city? *snaps* you coulda went to the moon, ya know. Anything to waste time! |
XDDD That is so me!
...you scare me sometimes.
Hmm.... so this is going to revolve around closets, huh? That's... new.
And I love Claudette's lines!
| Quote: |
| Claudette:Quill, stop abusing the ellipses. |
hehe nice
I'm in character.
Mark's in character.
Alexis is in character.
Matt is... oddly in character. (he likes his moo-ing, huh?)
So yes. Good on you for that, but echoing Amelia, this would be better under Other Fiction.
So I take it that you're aiming for humor AND horror type of thing. *nods* cool.
Good luck,
Syd |
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Formerly known as Silly Sydstix... as well as Aquarius Angel. |
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Kitty15
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 8:55 pm Post subject: |
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| This was really cool. I haven't been in the chat room too often but this seems to fit. Claudette and Mattster certainly have the best lines. Basically, great job! |
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 9:38 pm Post subject: |
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hahaha, you make me sound like a slave driving moderator of magical status XD How creative of you! Really though, I'm not that demanding... sometimes.
Ack, I'm half tempted to move this to fanfiction, honestly >_< It's more chat log/randomness than script. Because I take scripts in two ways: read, and acted out on stage/viewed. This couldn't be done the second way, honestly, other than the very end. It was slightly funny, but for a script it just didn't do well =/ You know? Plot less, goal less. It was meant to make you laugh, I suppose, rather than read a script...hmmm.
But, ah well. That was uh... creative? haha. |
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PsychicNinja
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 11:47 pm Post subject: |
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| haha! |
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| Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 12:52 am Post subject: |
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LMAO! poor Matt! You guys are mean to him  |
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| Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:37 am Post subject: |
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| Lol I don't know these people, but this is funny! XD Poor poor Mattster... whoever he/she is. ^_^ Update this soon! It sounds promisine. =) |
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