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helloiloveyou24
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 Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 7:48 pm Post subject: Life is Like Playdough |
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I created this for a speech I had to make in an English class. Ever since then, it's been quite controversial amongst my acquaintances. I would like to know what others think about it.
Life is like playdough. It comes in all colors, all shapes, and all sizes. You can make your playdough into whatever you want. People are going to come along and try to ruin what you are beginning to make, but you cannot let them crush your playdough. Don't let them take it away from you either, they have their own playdough to worry about. Most importantly, never give up on what you are trying to make. One day it will be finished, and then all the hard work will finally pay off. You gain satisfaction in what you make, and you gain in life exactly what you put into it. It all comes together, it represents you, and it is no better, or greater, than the next person's playdough. |
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Trident
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| Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 8:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Well the words are inspirational, and it sounds good. But the word "playdough" is kind of contradictory in this style. It's almost as if it's too silly of a word to be used this seriously. |
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| Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2006 7:31 pm Post subject: |
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I really like that  |
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carelessaussie13
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| Posted: Thu Nov 16, 2006 10:59 pm Post subject: |
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| I agree that playdough is too silly a word fot the style of writing you have chosen. Even just switching it to clay would, in my opinion, add a lot to the piece. Really good, though, and an unteresting perspective. |
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RoxanneR
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| Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 11:50 am Post subject: |
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What else are you supposed to change playdough to?! I like it. It sums up most of life, just the way it is. Keep writing!
RR* |
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rosethorn
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| Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 12:26 pm Post subject: |
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It draws a very clear parallel. I like the idea.
The idea of "playdough" is actually great. Because this is a serious idea but it's also comical because it's playdough. And can't life be comical and serious just the same?
As always,
Miss POKE |
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Phorcys
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| Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 6:54 pm Post subject: |
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I like the playdough idea. I think it juxtaposes a serious message with a fun thought and also presents the ideology an a witty way.
but thats just my opinion of course. |
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irnbru666
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| Posted: Fri Jan 12, 2007 11:18 pm Post subject: |
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| Trident wrote: |
| Well the words are inspirational, and it sounds good. But the word "playdough" is kind of contradictory in this style. It's almost as if it's too silly of a word to be used this seriously. |
I disagree with this, I think playdough is a perfectly appropriate word, because I believe life shouldn't be taken too seriously. I feel the word playdough adds humour to this theory and shows the reader how something as simple as life can be compared to something so simple and childlike. |
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| Posted: Fri Jan 12, 2007 11:21 pm Post subject: |
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| I liked it. The meaning behind it is great. but yeah "playdough" is too silly a word for the narrator who sound so serious and stern. If you lightened up the voice you were using then it would work better. |
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The Gambler
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| Posted: Fri Feb 02, 2007 9:54 am Post subject: |
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| I like! It's got big serious ideas in it, but you stop it sounding overly pretentious by using "playdough". Very clever, and rather neat. |
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| Posted: Sun Feb 04, 2007 2:20 am Post subject: |
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| thats really cute. |
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| Posted: Sun Feb 04, 2007 5:32 am Post subject: |
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Very simple but it contains a really good metaphor for this estranged game of Life we've got going on.
I agree with everyone else that "play dough" distracts from the tone of the piece. Changing it to "clay" would help it.
Great work!
LUNA |
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| Posted: Sun Feb 04, 2007 4:30 pm Post subject: |
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"Life is like a box of chocolates."
"Life is like a roller coaster."
Look, life can be like anything. My friend and I once played a game where we related random objects in her garage to life. It can be done: sidewalk chalk, wrenches, flat tires, all can be related to life if you have a speck of imagination. This is not original. It is cliche to the sixteenth power, as most inspirational speeches are.
As an inspirational speech, it is successful, I'll give you that, if your target audience is that of sobby English teachers and people who like "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition".
Also, how can it be controversial? I'd like to know just what the controversy was over a sappy life metaphor.
I can see that it's well-written and structured, with few errors. Apply those skills to something more original.
Colleen |
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| Posted: Mon Feb 12, 2007 11:59 am Post subject: |
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| Chill out. Life can be almost everything. You should expand it, and include your experiences. You should also use some quotes from Plato, Shakespeare or whatever. But it was inspirational (regardless of playdough). |
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gymnast_789
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| Posted: Sat Feb 17, 2007 6:16 pm Post subject: |
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| I agree that playdough is too silly a word fot the style of writing you have chosen. Even just switching it to clay would, in my opinion, add a lot to the piece. Really good, though, and an unteresting perspective. |
I disagree with this, playdough is fine. Its adds a little bit of fun.
I really that, Good Job! |
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