Topic ID: 6235
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ConvolutedEmpty
Writer

 Gender:  Age: 18 Joined: 11 Sep 2005 Posts: 97 Reviews: 13 Country: utopia, the rainbow flavoured version 300 Points
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Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 1:38 am Post subject: Stamps of Upside Down |
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Zakei’s took off in a stoner’s hippie van, his only bag cow’s clothing, echo.
A toothbrush, a bathing suit, some underwear
a couple of twenty-dollar bills.
His black trenchcoat, filled with american and canadian pennies, controversy, stilleto heel cigars, and stamps of upside down.
Useless unless he wanted to converse in pen with MC Escher, bless his twisted, confused heart.
Started off on dirty paths watching dirty fields run by, to touch the brown in the sky
Oh, he loved his chocolate world, he liked it dark with hazelnut
Ended in city life where women with warm mouths had cold hearts and eyes like winter sky
Sang him lullabies that only tramps can sing
The words are broken, all unseeing, off tune and squeaky clean
He made his life in cheap potato chip crumbs in-the-sheets motels
Rolling over brown wool with beautiful people in ugly lives
Pale limbs and dark sweat, sweet mouths with bitter tears
And plastic lies ; the lullabies that woman sang with winter eyes
Ended in Italia, a city of hot inhales and fierce white exhales
The women watched him like cats watched mice desire in eyes like coal
The bellas of italia ; all long legs and scented smoke
And murmurs like not so beatles after all music
All empty promises and lies like lullabies the woman wore their winter eyes like revlon envy
Smelling chardonnay on ms.italia’s breath
Her tongue was sour lemonade
That tongue she used to sing a lullaby, watching him
With winter eyes, as she took time
To spread her legs, and show him he was welcome
The silken garters wounded the woolen sheets of a dying mattress
Long way from home, on grimy foreign streets with crumbs between his jeans and ass
The cowboy boots coming apart
But they looked good
On twiggy boy
The only boy
That could look good, with his long legs and scented smoke and chardonnay lemonade tongue singing lullabies, in painted revlon envy
Saying goodbye
he kissed her with his winter eyes
she said they looked like sky.
wrote this a few months ago, before joining YWS, 'bout a character of mine |
_________________ Words are spilling out like endless rain into a paper cup, they slither while they pass. They slip away across the universe... Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting thorough my open mind possessing and caressing me.. |
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Whatsarahsaid
Senior Writer

 Gender:  Age: 16 Joined: 12 Sep 2005 Posts: 144 Reviews: 53 Country: england. 300 Points
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Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 5:42 pm Post subject: |
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Amazing. I can scarcely type, this is the best thing I have read in sometime.
You are everthing I could hope to be... Love your style.
"he kissed her with his winter eyes
she said they looked like sky. " |
_________________ Alice♥
"stay up all night with the stars." |
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ConvolutedEmpty
Writer

 Gender:  Age: 18 Joined: 11 Sep 2005 Posts: 97 Reviews: 13 Country: utopia, the rainbow flavoured version 300 Points
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Posted: Sat Dec 10, 2005 7:51 pm Post subject: |
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| Aw, you're so nice. There should be more commenters like you at YWS! |
_________________ Words are spilling out like endless rain into a paper cup, they slither while they pass. They slip away across the universe... Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting thorough my open mind possessing and caressing me.. |
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Whatsarahsaid
Senior Writer

 Gender:  Age: 16 Joined: 12 Sep 2005 Posts: 144 Reviews: 53 Country: england. 300 Points
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Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 8:55 pm Post subject: actually... |
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| Well actually, I'm sure I'm breaking a rule or too..... |
_________________ Alice♥
"stay up all night with the stars." |
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Snoink
Snuggly Writer of Legend

 Gender:  Age: 20 Joined: 02 Apr 2005 Posts: 8446 Reviews: 2105 Country: USA 624 Points
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Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:09 am Post subject: |
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Reminds me of the show, "Lonely Planet" which has since been called "Globetrekkers." Basically? See the world!
Yeah..
The images were interesting. I have no idea about the meaning of the poem (my mind isn't working tonight) but it reminds me of traveling. And reading of foreign places in different languages.
I have to say though, this by far was the most "wow! pay attention!" moment of the poem:
"To spread her legs, and show him he was welcome."
XD I'm such a perv... |
_________________ Leopluridon '08: He Will Show Us The Way!
"So, Obama calls McCain erratic. Well, I call Obama a squirrel." -- Rush Limbaugh |
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