Queen Lucinda’s eyebrows arched high as she shrieked. “This is all your fault!”
“My fault?” King Rupert replied indignantly.
Both King and Queen sat in the courtyard of their castle. Directly in the middle of the courtyard to be exact, a rather pleasant place to be since early spring was about and flowers bloomed fervently all around them. They were having their morning tea. A tradition that recently started after Lucinda complained in her shrilly voice to Rupert that they never had tea together like the other Kings and Queens. So there they were, not less then a day later, sitting in the courtyard having tea- making the prominent known fact that the Queen ran everything all the more obvious. And although they sat about two inches from each other on finely crafted chairs, their voices raised to fill the whole courtyard. Queen Lucinda’s face was even beginning to turn a very unqueenly shade of purple.
“Yes, your fault. She’s your child!”
The King chuckled at this. “Really Lucinda, I think she’s your child too.”
The Queen glared at her husband and put a large dose of sugar in her tea, unnecessarily since the cup was practically overflowing. “Well, if you hadn’t named her what you did maybe she wouldn’t be so-”
“So what?” Rupert cut in angrily. “Sam was my mother’s name and she was a fine lady. A fine name Sam is…”
“…a fine boyish name,” Lucinda finished. “I told you when she was born. Do you remember? I said, ‘Rupert, name her carefully, a name determines a person’s character.’ And what do you do? Name her Sam! A boyish name, that explains it.”
“Explains what dear? I’m afraid you seem to be more informed then me on the matter at hand. God knows you always are.”
“Do you know what I caught your daughter doing today? Sword fighting!” She spat the words out distastefully. “And dressed like a stable hand too!”
“Really? I heard rumors…Is she as good as they claim?” King Rupert asked excitingly.
“Rupert!” the Queen gasped. “Don’t encourage her! It’s bad enough such unprincesslike rumors are true!”
The King coughed politely. “Umm, I mean, how disastrous!”
“Yes,” Lucinda agreed, “if word of this gets out she’ll hardly be able to get a decent princess job. No witch will want to cast a spell on her; no giant will want to capture her…Imagine, Rupert, the consequences! She won’t need any prince to rescue her. She won’t ever be married! Our bloodline as we know it will disappear!”
“Come now dear, it wouldn’t be that bad.”
“Yes it would. However will she be married off then Rupert?” The Queen swooned dramatically, a touch she often added for affect. However, she promptly collapsed right out of her chair, landing right on the ground with a loud ‘thump’.
Rupert frowned at this new revelation as he routinely got out of his chair and fanned his temporally fainted wife. Since the servants were neither concerned nor troubled by his supposed unconscious wife, it was his designated job to tend to her. As he did so he thought about the daughter in question.
Sam was the youngest of his five daughters. All the rest of his girls were already happily married off after a scheduled capture, leaving Sam the last one. She was just turning seventeen today, past the usual time of being married at sixteen. He wasn’t in any rush or generally worried. Sam was a slender, petite, and normally charming, intelligent girl. However, he had to admit she had a knack for odd things. But whoever heard of a princess sword fighting? Or arguing court politics for dwarfs? It was simple unheard of. It was simple not done.
His wife fluttered her eyes and sat up out of his arms, deciding that the allotted time for a dramatic affect had passed. “I’m sorry Rupert. I guess the thought of such things was a spell to much for my comfort.”
“Of course dear, you must remember not to get so worked up.” He thought for a while then added, “If it makes you happy, I’ll sit Sam down and give her a good talking to.”
“Thank you Rupert. That’s really all I’m asking for.” Lucinda stood up with a swish of her golden dress. Quite quick for a woman recently fainted, but the Queen was a woman of many talents. “I think I shall retire now. It is way too early in the morning to be fully awake anyways.”
As she left, the King muttered to himself under his breath. “And it was your flipping idea to get up so early for morning tea!”
I love how the King and Queen seem so.... real. Like my parents they argue it's funny. I love your last line but Kisses was right use 'bloody' or something else flipping is kinda of cheesy. Nonetheless I iked it!
