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Nate
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 Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 4:14 am Post subject: Sanctum Chronicle, Issue 1, Volume 1 |
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The Sanctum Chronicle
Issue 1, Volume 1
http://sanctum.youngwriterssociety.com
Mine Collapse! Dozens Stunned!
Citizens from across Sanctum converged upon the mines earlier this week to remove stones that had collapsed due to one miner’s greed. Fifteen miners were trapped in the wreckage. All are in stable condition at the Healer’s Hut in Sanctum.
Just the latest in a series of embarrassing mine collapses, public outrage is deafening. “I don’t know who’s in charge around here,” Uhtred the Bard of Sanctum says, “But the government needs to hold a public inquiry into these so-called mine collapses.”
Many conjecture that the mine collapses are in fact caused by Lily, the owner of the mines. Whenever tragedy occurs, Lily sells ten times more pickaxes and helmets than normal. Lily had no comment for this story.
Werewolves: A Rising Menace?
The Sanctum Health and Safety Commission has issued a release stating that despite an increase in reports, Werewolves are in fact not real.
“There is no scientific basis for the so-called Werewolf,” Secretary Hidzonni said. “These reports are simply fabrications conjured from someone’s bored imagination.”
Townspeople say otherwise, however. “Werewolves aren’t real?” Nate the barkeep rhetorically pondered. “Excuse my French, but that’s total bull-feathers. I just served one a Mule Daniels yesterday. I remember because they usually tip well.”
Hundreds Arrive from Isle of Wen: Hunting a “Green” Dragon?
Long-time residents of Sanctum have been baffled by the 130 new residents that have recently arrived from the Isle of Wen only in the past couple of months.
“They say they’re hunting a green Dragon,” Llywen says. “Personally, I think Nate’s putting something in their ale.”
Other townspeople have different theories. “Have you seen the Matrix?” Deimos asks. “I think we’re living in it, and these are people from the outside world.”
None of the new residents could be reached for comment, although one muttered something about how a ‘Firestarter’ beat him with random historical references. |
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Adam_Atlantian
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| Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 5:14 am Post subject: |
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*falls to the ground in laughter*
I love it! And werewolves are so real. |
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kitty15
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| Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:29 am Post subject: |
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| That is awesome! |
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JabberHut
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:09 pm Post subject: |
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LOL!
That was awesome. 
Jabber, the One and Only! |
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gyrfalcon
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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Oh I love it! *rolls on the ground, choking with laughter* You should do one about "Uthred: Sanctum's No. 1 Ladies' Man."  |
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Kyte
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| Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 9:39 pm Post subject: |
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| That was great. |
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