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Nectar of the Gods
Nectar of the Gods

by Bittersweet in Historical Fiction
Young Writers Society Forum Index » Fanfiction

This thread was created on May 30, 2007
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A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 30)
A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 31)
A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 32)
A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 33)
A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 34)
A New Fan Fiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 35)
Outpost 101 - Chapter 1
Outpost 101 - Chapter 2
Outpost 101 - Chapter 3
Outpost 101 - Chapter 4
Outpost 101 - Chapter 5
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A New Fanfiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 2)
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Dynamo   View This User's Portfolio
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 1:03 am    Post subject: A New Fanfiction: Final Fantasy 8 (Chapter 2) Reply with quote

(My skills get better after every chapter. It's like I gain experience and at one point I level up, just like in the game! Wouldn't that be cool?)

Tylor approached Squall and Quistis. They were both waiting patiently for him. Squall is wearing the same black jacket, black leather pants, and white T-shirt he had on when he left the classroom. Quistis on the other hand, is wearing her usual red outfit that she wears in the game. As he approached he noticed both of his swords lying on the front gate’s stairs.

“Quistis,” he asked, “why are my swords here? I thought you said someone would take them to my room later.”

Quistis replied, “Your arrival took us by such short notice that we didn’t have time to prepare a room for you. You’ll be getting your own room and school uniform after the SeeD exam. As for why your swords are here, you can’t very well fight monsters without a weapon now can you?”

“I guess not.” Tylor went over to his swords. He picked them up and held them in each hand for the first time. He held the futuristic sword, Armageddon in his right hand and the ancient looking sword, Apocalypse in his left. To anyone else it would have been impossible to hold just one without both hands, yet they were as light as feathers in his grip.

“Ready to go?” Quistis asked. Tylor placed his swords on his back to carry them and nodded. “The Fire Cavern used for the test is located east of here.” With that they headed to the Fire Cavern.

They arrived at the Fire Cavern fifteen minutes later. Two Garden faculty members stood in front of the entrance. They wore long red and white robes and yellow hats that hid their faces.

Quistis addressed one of them. “We’re here for the test.”

The faculty member told them, “The objective is to obtain a low-level Guardian Force. A SeeD member must act as support. Are you ready?”

Tylor and Squall both saluted said, “I’m ready.”

Quistis did the same and said, “I’m their support. Instructor No. 14, Quistis Trepe.”

The man continued, “Please select a time limit. Choose one suited to your abilities. Challenging yet reasonable.”

Tylor spoke out, “Twenty minutes should be more than enough for me.”

“Very well. Good luck.” Both men stepped aside so they could enter the cave. Once inside they began they test.

The inside of the cavern is filled with lava and rock. Hundreds of stalagmites rose from the ground and even more stalactites hung from the ceiling. Smoke rose off of the lake of lava. A stone formation acted as a path through the cavern.

As they walked Quistis said, “My job is to support you in battle. Everything else is up to you two.”

Squall replied, “Fine.”

As they continued through the cavern they met surprisingly little resistance from monsters. Quistis continued, “You know, the boys often choke on this test when I come with them. My guess is that my charm makes them nervous.”

Squall didn’t say anything but Tylor decided to fill the void. “I think they should keep they’re minds on the fight at hand or they’ll end up dead.”

“I’m just kidding! Trying to keep you two relaxed, that’s all.”

They continued on through the cavern. By Tylor’s calculation they were about half way to the end. Just then two round fiery creatures known as bombs jumped out from the lava and attack them. As if by instinct Tylor retrieved one of his swords, Armageddon. He lunged at the bomb to the left and attacked it with a horizontal slash. Within the same motion he spun his body around and brought his sword back for another slash. The bomb’s body suddenly got larger as it was about to explode. Tylor jumped back a few feet and blasted it with an ice spell. The magical attack knocked the creature back before it exploded, keeping everyone out of the blast radius.

Tylor turned back to Squall and Quistis who were just finishing off the other bomb. Quistis came up to him and complimented his fighting skill. “Very good, Tylor. I can see you were trained very well in your last Garden. You were quick to react and took out your opponent before it had a chance to strike.”

“Uh… thanks, I guess.” Tylor didn’t really care about the compliment. What he was really worried about is how he was able to fight as well has he just did. He knows he’s in a video game, but everything just feels so really. He had never picked up a sword in his life and yet he instinctively knew when to attack and how to use his sword. What’s even weirder is how he was able to use magic without even thinking. It was as if during the battle something else had taken control of his body, as if another part of his mind he didn’t know existed had opened up and told him what to do.

Quistis stated, “We’d better move on. We only have fifteen more minutes to finish this before our time runs out.”

Tylor shook his head. “Right.” He could worry about this later. Right now he has to use this new ‘experience’ to his advantage.

After a few more battles they began to reach the end of the cavern. As they approached the final area Quistis spoke to Squall. “I guess I was right. You and Seifer are in a class of your own. You both have amazing strength and potential.” They reached an outcropping of stalagmites in the centre of the lake of lava. A hole is seen in the middle of the outcropping, glowing bright orange the closer they came. Quistis stopped them. “OK, this is it. Are you two ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Tylor said. Squall just waved his hand.

“You both seem confident enough.”

The ground began to shake as the hole started spitting out bits of lava and rock. A large creature jumped out and landed in front of them. The creature’s name is Ifrit. He’s a minatuar type creature with fire for hair and long horns that curved behind his head. His body was slightly hunched over. He let out a terrifying roar.

Tylor instinctively began giving out orders to Squall and Quistis. “Squall! Start casting ice type magic. Quistis! Summon Shiva. I’ll destract him!” They nodded in agreement.

Squall attacked first. He cast the ice spell called Blizzard. While the spell was materializing Tylor grabbed both his swords and charged Ifrit. A giant sphere of is appeared over the creature’s head. If fell to hit his head but Ifrit knocked it away as if it was nothing. Tylor lunged at him and brought both his swords down on his chest. Ifrit’s hide is too thick to penitrate with a single attack and both swords bounced off his skin.

Ifrit smacked Tylor with the back of his hand, sending him flying towards one of the stalagmites edging the platform. He spun his body and landed feet first on the rock. He used the rock to jump back into battle, this time from above. He landed on Ifrit’s back and slashed his head with both swords. As the swords came down Ifrit jerked his head, making his horns get in the way of one of the swords. The blade of Armageddon cut Ifrit’s head, but didn’t penitrate his skull. The creature roared in pain and flung Tylor off his head. Squall had another Blizzard spell ready and dropped another sphere of ice on his head, this time it hit. Ifrit stumbled and fell to one knee.

“Impudent humans!”

Tylor came back and slashed Ifrit’s arm. This time the attack was enough to draw blood. But instead of blood, lava flowed from the wound. Ifrit let out another roar of pain and flung his arm at Tylor. He lifted his swords to shield his body from the attack. The swords took most of the impact but he was knocked back a few feet.

Quistis yelled out, “Tylor! Get out of there!” Knowing that she was about to summon Shiva he jumped to the top of one of the stalagmites and grabbed on to keep clear of the blast radius.

White, icy mist began to accumulate in front of Quistis. A large pinnacle of ice shot out of the ground. In it was a naked woman with blue skin and yellow hair, Shive. She broke from the ice and lifted her arms over her head. A glowing white light began to grow in her hands. When it reached the point where it was too big to hold she thrust her arms forward and let out an icy blast that froze everything it touched, including Ifrit. The ice shattered once Shiva disappeared.

Ifrit shouted out, “They have Shiva?!” He got to his feet and started to glow with a fiery orange light. Ifrit cast the magic spell called Fire on Quistis. It didn’t cause any serious burns but it did manage to make her lose her balance.

Tylor used this moment of distraction to his advantage. He leaped off the rock and sliced Ifrit down the back. The creature roared. With great speed he spun around and grabbed Tylor with one hand. Ifrit’s grip kept Tylor’s arms bound so he couldn’t get free. The creature lifted him up to his face and growled at him. Scorching hot air left Ifrit’s mouth and nearly scalded Tylor’s face. But, another sphere of ice had appeared above his head. Squall had cast another Blizzard spell while he wasn’t looking. The ice slammed hard into Ifrit’s head. His grip loosened and Tylor was able to get himself free. Before Ifrit had a chance to regain his balance Tylor lifted both swords over his head and slashed Ifrit’s chest with a cris-cross motion. Lava spurted from the wound in different directions as Ifrit fell to his knees.

Ifrit’s breath came out in wheezes. “Ugh… I underestimate you. Very well, I will join you.” With that Ifrit retreated back down the fiery hole whence he came.

Once everyone had regrouped Quistis stated, “Well done. Squall, your use of magic was good.”

Squall just crossed his arms and said, “Whatever.”

She turned to Tylor. “Tylor, if it wasn’t for your fighting skill your selfless act of heroism might have gotten you killed, but you put up a good fight and made it easier for us to cast magic from a safe distance. You also gave well thought out orders within the small amount of time given to you. You have good planning skills.”

“Thanks.”

Quistis nodded. “Alright, let’s go back to Garden.” They head towards the entrance of the cavern.

After a long walk through Fire Cavern and through the forest they made it back to Balamb Garden, and in one piece too. When they reached the front gate Quistis congratulated them. “Well done.” She crossed her arms and began to think. “Let’s see… I thought there was something else I needed to go over with you before you take the SeeD exam… Oh yes! Taking care of your Guardian Force. GF for short. This is something you have to watch out for.” She gave a lecture to Tylor and Squall explaining how to take care of their GFs. Apparently every student in the Garden gets an implant in the back of the head when they first come. Through this implant the students can call GFs to their sides and connect certain magic spells through the creatures to raise their own strengths. This was never mentioned in the game but now it makes sense to Tylor. But to his knowledge he never received an implant so how was he able to equip his Guardian Forces? When Quistis finished with the lecture she said, “Now change into your uniform and assemble at the first floor lobby.” Tylor opened his mouth to say something but she continued, “Since you don’t have a uniform, Tylor, you’ll just have to do the exam in those clothes. Just be sure to stay close to your squad members so you are not mistaken for an enemy.”

“Got it.” Nothing else to say, Quistis left them. Tylor turned to Squall and said, “Hey, maybe we’ll be in the same squad for the exam?”

“Whatever.”

Tylor chuckled. “Nothing about you changes, does it?”

Squall looked at him and asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Worried that his cover might be blown he said, “Uh, nothing. Good luck in the exam.” He ran off before Squall had a chance to say anything else.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 21, 2007 7:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Another good chapter; I spotted some issues with grammar and spelling, but I'll cut you some slack since you already said that you've been having issues with that since you got back from Japan. Very Happy

Liked the description of the boss battle; not your typical "he hit him, then got hit back" type battle. Well done.

P.S.: Thanks for the game tips! Very Happy That explains why I got so far on level 16. I thought that I was just lucky. Laughing

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 21, 2007 9:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A few spelling errors, but that's pretty much it. Bravo!

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 6:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

great job i couldn't find chpt 1 though i even checked you're portfolio pm me and tell me what happens please
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PostPosted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 10:33 pm    Post subject: fun gaming Reply with quote

Very Happy a few mistakes:
Quote:
Tylor and Squall both saluted said, “I’m ready


this should say either "tylor and squall both saluted and said,"I'm ready."
or "tylor and squall both saluted, saying,"I'm ready."

Quote:
Once inside they began they test.

"once inside they began their test" is the correct sentence.

Quote:
I think they should keep they’re minds on the fight at hand or they’ll end up dead.”


once again, you used the wrong form of "they're". it should be "their".

Quote:
If fell to hit his head but Ifrit knocked it away as if it was nothing


"If"should be "It".

overall, it was great . the story was more interesting than i thought it would be. well done!! Smile

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Couple spelling errors, A few grammar ones, but aside from a lot of telling in the opening it was good.

Just to be clear, I could not find your chapter 1 either. Unless you counted the prologue as it.

Very good work on the first mission, it was actually like playing it again, but for some reason it seemed to be rushed, and not just because of the time limit. Quistis's little side comments came up as more annoying then actually useful. A good teacher waits and talks about it afterwards and not in the middle of a fight, so it came off a weird.
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 4:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You did tend to lapse into present tense a lot. Like "The cavern is full of lava" and so on. Otherwise, the story was well written and the action flowed smoothly.

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