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Finding Claire Summary
Finding Claire Summary

by thevoiceinside in NaNoWriMo
Young Writers Society Forum Index » Science-Fiction

This thread was created on March 10, 2006
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The Wonder Door

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 12:25 pm    Post subject: The Wonder Door Reply with quote

Aard focused on the black door ahead. It was like no other door, its smoothness grand, its glimmer like no other door. There was no architrave present, the door just melded with the wall. Aard flicked back his curls of blond hair, he took a single step which brought him an inch from the blackness.

He placed a single finger onto the film of the door, it rippled like a liquid, sending silvered waves across the surface, Aard had felt nothing like it, a film with so much strength, yet so much softness. He brought his finger away and the silver vanished leaving plain blackness once more.

Aard breathed deeply, his nose curling inwards to try and flick of the sweat on the tip. This was it, something Aard had been waiting for several years. He placed his hand on the door's film. An indent was made sending out ripple shock waves over the entire door, an entire spectrum was created on the door and a pure note rang out from the folding of the ripples.

Aards foot kicked it and smashed the door until it went on the other side of it, a burning sensation ran through his bare feet along with cuts and lesions. A hole had been formed.

"What are you doing?" A surge of footsteps followed a strict voice down the corridor, Aard turned his foot smothered in blood, unable to speak, in shock, who were these people?

"Damaging LCD screens is classed as illegal." The strict voice dictated. "Step away from the computer monitor!"


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 1:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
flick of the sweat


Off

I really thought this was going to be an actually door like a gate to another world or teleporter but it turns out to be something I didn't expect it to be.

This is just a one-off I'm guessing?

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2006 1:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes it was a challenge on another forum.

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 3:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nice twist.

In the third paragraph you kept mentioning door which seemed a little repetitive, seeing as we know what the boy is touching. Apart from that it's a good short.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 7:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thankyou

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This thread was created on March 10, 2006

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