Topic ID: 6223
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mystical*dragons
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 Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 7:07 am Post subject: Of Lavender and Shooting Stars |
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Sorry...taking this off... |
Last edited by mystical*dragons on Sun Feb 26, 2006 2:47 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Boni_Bee
An old fashioned girl
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| Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 8:24 am Post subject: Re: Of Lavender and Stars |
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| silver*glitter wrote: |
| I know it’s been more than a year since we last talked, and well I was missing you? |
That line doesn't work somehow, but the rest.......was awesome!!! I really like the imagery, and it didn't seem cliche to me like most stories like this do. Interesting...  Its a very grown-up piece of work....  lol....
Good job  |
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Crayon
stuby, pink with a ripped slip. :)
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| Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 1:06 am Post subject: |
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 So Sad! i really could image somebody crying over love letters...watching shooting stars! its really great and im sure everybody can relate to it! So apart from the fact that i almost started bawling in the middle of computer class i think its great =D> |
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mystical*dragons
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 6:16 am Post subject: |
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Hi there,
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on this piece. I'm glad you guys liked it |
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Snoink
Snuggly
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| Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:23 am Post subject: |
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Oh dear...
I feel like I'm getting more apathetic each day. This hardly did anything for me. 
But still...
Why don't you send it to him anyway, just for kicks? Who knows what could happen... |
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"So, Obama calls McCain erratic. Well, I call Obama a squirrel." -- Rush Limbaugh
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mystical*dragons
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| Posted: Thu Dec 22, 2005 3:41 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks Snoink 
Send it to him? No way, he'd never understand. Oh well... |
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Angel17
Hidden thoughts
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| Posted: Thu Dec 22, 2005 11:18 pm Post subject: |
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I really loved it. I loved the imagery in the words. I didn't really like some of the parts about the angels at the end though, i didn't think all fit. I loved this line about angels though.
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| I hear them sometimes; they comfort me, when thoughts and memories of you do not. |
I didn't like this line so much though.
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| Do you hear the angels whispering? I hear them sometimes |
Overall i loved this piece if writing, i really felt your words. |
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diamond_eyes
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| Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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| wow thats a sad story, but sad ending for u... even tho there was no kisses and that kind of stuff it was soo romantic...it was great! |
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diamond_eyes
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| Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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| wow thats a sad story, but sad ending for u... even tho there was no kisses and that kind of stuff it was soo romantic...it was great! |
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Tazy
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| Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 4:35 am Post subject: |
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| Very interesting it captivated me. I just couldnt stop reading the imegrey was fantstic. |
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smaur
robot in disguise
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| Posted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 2:16 am Post subject: |
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Oh, this is gorgeously written. There are a couple of grammatical errors (it's the commas; they're the kiss of death, or something close enough) and a few words/sentences that jar the sound/atmosphere that the rest of the piece creates (the word nonetheless completely kills the last sentence), but I'll strangle my inner editor into silence (well, sort-of silence) for this one because I'm thinking a few out-of-place commas don't matter in the long run for this piece. (You didn't, I assume, post it so we could pick apart the sentence structure.) Like Snoink, I don't think the emotional oomph has quite carried across, but it's a lovely piece of word candy, which is enough. Good stuff.
(And if the distance between the two of you is wide enough, I do sort of think you should send it. Because, if he's not the kind of person to flout the letter, the potential gain outweighs the potential loss. And, if nothing else — well, it's a very pretty letter.) |
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